.04 ::'CAUSE :=Mama: 'Cause nobody ever got hurt, I guess. Agnes .08 ::'DISH :=Jessie: what things mean on my lists. I see 'dish towels,' and I used to wonder whether .01 ::'EM :=Jessie: washed. I'll be right back. And get 'em real dry. You dry your hands till I get .01 ::'EM :=Mama: You want me to wash 'em now or are you making your mess first? .04 ::'EM :=Mama: don't have to be true to talk about 'em, you know. .04 ::'EM :=Mama: to watch the fires as soon as she set 'em. One time she set out porch chairs and .10 ::'NIGHT :=Jessie: 'Night, Mother. .10 ::'NIGHT :=Jessie: I came over and kissed you and said, "'Night, Mother," and you heard me close .10 ::'NIGHT :=Mama: too? We sat around, you kissed me, "'Night Mother?" They'll want to know more, .08 ::120 :=Mama: a full-time secretary job and an IQ of 120. .01 ::A :=Jessie: And a big piece of plastic like a rubber sheet .01 ::A :=Jessie: Not a thing. Feel fine. .01 ::A :=Jessie: That's a good idea, Mama. .01 ::A :=Jessie: It's not a joke, Mama. .01 ::A :=Jessie: Shoot myself. In a couple of hours. .01 ::A :=Jessie: I'll go back and get it in a minute. There's a wagon wheel up there, .01 ::A :=Jessie: And a big piece of plastic like a rubber sheet or something. Garbage bags .01 ::A :=Jessie: wheel up there, too. There's even a churn. I'll get it all if you want. .01 ::A :=Jessie: an old blanket or towels we got in a soap box sometime? .01 ::A :=Jessie: anywhere, or a foam cushion out of a yard chair would be real good. .01 ::A :=Jessie: about some old pillows anywhere, or a foam cushion out of a yard chair would .01 ::A :=Jessie: more coming tomorrow. I ordered you a whole case. .01 ::A :=Jessie: back and get it in a minute. There's a wagon wheel up there, too. There's even .01 ::A :=Jessie: Your hands aren't washed. Do you want a manicure or not? .01 ::A :=Jessie: if I didn't say it? You want it to be a surprise? You're lying there in your bed .01 ::A :=Mama: A whole case will go stale, Jessie. .01 ::A :=Mama: It's not a floor at all, hon, it's a board now and .01 ::A :=Mama: Don't go making a big mess, Jessie. It's eight o'clock a .01 ::A :=Mama: I said don't make a mess. Your hair is black enough, hon. .01 ::A :=Mama: I don't like the idea of a gun, Jess. .01 ::A :=Mama: Ricky is mixed up. That's not a crime. .01 ::A :=Mama: You are not! Don't even say such a thing, Jessie. .01 ::A :=Mama: been in it again. I ought to put a big mirror on the refrigerator door. That'll .01 ::A :=Mama: It's not a floor at all, hon, it's a board now and then. Measure this for me. .01 ::A :=Mama: Ricky will grow out of this and be a real fine boy, Jess. But I have to tell .01 ::A :=Mama: or get a job or one day you'll get a call and he'll say he's sorry for all the .01 ::A :=Mama: Fletcher sold hers to somebody with a flea market for forty dollars. .01 ::A :=Mama: I wouldn't want Ricky to know we had a gun in the house. .01 ::A :=Mama: come down from there before you have a fit. I can't come up and get you, you .01 ::A :=Mama: what's out here to steal. Never seen a one. .01 ::A :=Mama: way too serious, hon. I've never seen a criminal in my life. This is way too far .01 ::A :=Mama: sugar. He'll get back in school or get a job or one day you'll get a call and he'll .02 ::A :=Jessie: Jesus was a suicide, if you ask me. .02 ::A :=Jessie: He took it as a compliment. He thought I might be taking .02 ::A :=Jessie: prowlers. He said he thought it was a good idea. He told me what kind to ask .02 ::A :=Jessie: with the robe, he'll say. Be back in a minute. .02 ::A :=Jessie: got me dusting powder, Loretta got me a new housecoat, pink probably, and Dawson .02 ::A :=Mama: It's a sin. You'll go to hell. .02 ::A :=Mama: Dawson will put a stop to this. Yes he will. He'll take the .02 ::A :=Mama: You'll cock the pistol and have a fit. .02 ::A :=Mama: You'll miss. You'll just wind up a vegetable. How would you like that? Shoot .02 ::A :=Mama: They're my towels. I've had them for a long time. I like my towels. .02 ::A :=Mama: eyes. Stuff cotton in your ears. Take a nap! It's quiet in your room. I'll leave .03 ::A :=Jessie: Not a bit. I am worried about you, but I'm going .03 ::A :=Jessie: Only a matter of time, anyway, Mama. When the .03 ::A :=Jessie: No. It's a funny idea, though. What do you sing? .03 ::A :=Jessie: If it was a mistake, we made it together. You took .03 ::A :=Jessie: Nothing. Want a caramel? .03 ::A :=Jessie: I want to hang a big sign around my neck, like Daddy's on .03 ::A :=Jessie: Mama -- I'm just not having a very good time and I don't have any reason .03 ::A :=Jessie: There's extra light bulbs in a box in the hall closet. And we've got a .03 ::A :=Jessie: The washer repair number is on a little card taped to the side of the m .03 ::A :=Jessie: and they learned it before you had a chance to say whether you wanted them to .03 ::A :=Jessie: or do you want Dawson to? I've got a note to him. I'll add that to it if you .03 ::A :=Jessie: a seizure any time. What good would a job do? The kind of job I could get would .03 ::A :=Jessie: going to sit around tonight. I made a list of things. .03 ::A :=Jessie: name when you call. The number's on a whole list of numbers on the back cover .03 ::A :=Jessie: I went to the hospital. I could have a seizure any time. What good would a job .03 ::A :=Jessie: box in the hall closet. And we've got a couple of packages of fuses in the fuse .03 ::A :=Jessie: going to stop it. So. Let's just have a good time. .03 ::A :=Jessie: somewhere else, you wouldn't get such a glare on it during the day. I'll do whatever .03 ::A :=Jessie: won't let them put it in the bottom of a sack like that one time, remember? .03 ::A :=Mama: Have a good time. .03 ::A :=Mama: We've got a good life here! .03 ::A :=Mama: I asked you a question. .03 ::A :=Mama: We could get a new dog and keep him in the house. Dogs .03 ::A :=Mama: You could get a job! .03 ::A :=Mama: You're not having a good time! Whoever promised you a good .03 ::A :=Mama: a good time! Whoever promised you a good time? Do you think I've had a good .03 ::A :=Mama: get another dog, Jessie! You liked a big dog, now, didn't you? That King dog, .03 ::A :=Mama: made some new friends at least. Had a life to lead. Had your own things around .03 ::A :=Mama: you might want a place of your own. A grown woman should... .03 ::A :=Mama: Or maybe the doctor would let you get a driver's license now, or I know what let's .03 ::A :=Mama: You could work some puzzles or put in a garden or go to the store. Let's call a .03 ::A :=Mama: garden or go to the store. Let's call a taxi and to the A&P! .03 ::A :=Mama: into. You could get one that he's got a job, that he's getting married, or how .03 ::A :=Mama: then, but I can see how you might want a place of your own. A grown woman shoul .03 ::A :=Mama: you a good time? Do you think I've had a good time? .03 ::A :=Mama: your own things around you. Give Ricky a place to come see you. You never should've .04 ::A :=Jessie: I didn't know she had a house full of birds! .04 ::A :=Jessie: She really eats okra twice a day? Where does she get it in the wint .04 ::A :=Jessie: Does that mean I can't have a caramel apple? .04 ::A :=Jessie: sometime? Or did she see me have a fit and's afraid I might have another one .04 ::A :=Jessie: cocoa, Mama. And I'd like to have a caramel apple and do your nails. .04 ::A :=Jessie: go? She can't get Buster to build her a new one, he's dead. How could she burn .04 ::A :=Mama: "Like a corpse," she says, "and I'm gonna be one .04 ::A :=Mama: When she was a girl, Jess, not now. Long time ago. But .04 ::A :=Mama: Well now, what a good idea. We should've had more cocoa. .04 ::A :=Mama: You didn't eat a bite of supper. .04 ::A :=Mama: Well, she eats it a lot. Maybe not two meals, but... .04 ::A :=Mama: Why does she have a house full of birds? .04 ::A :=Mama: Her kitchen is just a tiny thing. When she comes over here, she .04 ::A :=Mama: Wouldn't surprise me a bit. .04 ::A :=Mama: She's calling me from a pay phone this week. God only knows why. .04 ::A :=Mama: That's fine with me. I'm not a bit sleepy. .04 ::A :=Mama: in. Eight fire, and she's due for a new one any day now. .04 ::A :=Mama: She's as crazy as they come. She's a lunatic. .04 ::A :=Mama: ever make out about it. Agnes like a feeling of accomplishment. .04 ::A :=Mama: life filled up, she says. She says a lot of stupid things. It's all that okra .04 ::A :=Mama: just willy-nilly eat okra two meals a day and expect to get away with it. Made .04 ::A :=Mama: she feels like -- Well, we all like a change of scene, don't we? .04 ::A :=Mama: not. I mean -- Of course you can have a caramel apple. .04 ::A :=Mama: whistles. Just little plastic ones on a necklace she won playing Bingo, and I only .04 ::A :=Mama: about it because I thought I might get a laugh out of you for once even if it wasn't .04 ::A :=Mama: just follow her home. Well, I know for a fact she's still paying on the last parrot .04 ::A :=Mama: this week. God only knows why. She has a perfectly good Trimline at home. .05 ::A :=Jessie: Or make me a boyfriend out of pipe cleaners and sit .05 ::A :=Jessie: to dance and wasn't I going to get a kick out of that. Or sit up with a sick .05 ::A :=Jessie: Sorry for you, I mean. He seemed like a nice man. .05 ::A :=Jessie: get a kick out of that. Or sit up with a sick cow all night and leave me a chain .05 ::A :=Jessie: hair done, you could take them all for a walk! .05 ::A :=Jessie: with a sick cow all night and leave me a chain of sleepy stick elephants on my bed .05 ::A :=Mama: It's a real waste of chocolate. You don't have .05 ::A :=Mama: No. It was a big fat lie, the whole thing. He just thought .05 ::A :=Mama: He never said a word he didn't have to, Jessie. That was .05 ::A :=Mama: Into what? The Queen? A clerk in a shoe store? Why should I? Because .05 ::A :=Mama: I'll tell her to bring a pan. You said you would do whatever I wanted! .05 ::A :=Mama: if he were still alive. That's a fine thing to figure out, isn't it? .05 ::A :=Mama: He felt sorry for me. He wanted a plain country woman and that's what he .05 ::A :=Mama: Into what? The Queen? A clerk in a shoe store? Why should I? Because he said .05 ::A :=Mama: That's why I left. He didn't say a thing. It was his last chance not to talk .05 ::A :=Mama: I love him, Jessie. I didn't have a thing he wanted. He got his share, though. .05 ::A :=Mama: do whatever I wanted! I don't want a bunch of pans cluttering up my cabinets .05 ::A :=Mama: on the porch and I told him to get a shirt on and he went in and got one and .05 ::A :=Mama: all he'd have to show for it was -- a whole pipe-cleaner family -- chickens, .05 ::A :=Mama: at them and I hid his pipe cleaners a couple of times but he always had more .05 ::A :=Mama: family -- chickens, pigs, a dog with a bad leg -- it was creepy strange. It made .05 ::A :=Mama: think you can rest easy if you get me a new babysitter? Well, I don't want to live .05 ::A :=Mama: were born and he said you didn't have a chance. .05 ::A :=Mama: yourself about that. He said you were a runt and he said it from the day you were .05 ::A :=Mama: pipe-cleaner family -- chickens, pigs, a dog with a bad leg -- it was creepy strange. .06 ::A :=Jessie: You didn't need a porch, Mama. .06 ::A :=Jessie: I told them I was taking a little holiday and to look after you. .06 ::A :=Jessie: I guess you and Agnes had a good talk about that, huh? .06 ::A :=Jessie: I told them to keep delivering a quart a week no matter what you said. I .06 ::A :=Jessie: and you give the bills to Dawson once a month. .06 ::A :=Jessie: I told them to keep delivering a quart a week no matter what you said. I told them .06 ::A :=Mama: He had a girl, Jessie. I walked right in on them .06 ::A :=Mama: It's the same thing. A seizure in the hospital is a fit at ho .06 ::A :=Mama: How were you going to get a husband never opening your mouth to a living .06 ::A :=Mama: All right! I wanted you to have a husband. .06 ::A :=Mama: sees the driveway looking down from a stretcher passed out cold? .06 ::A :=Mama: thing. A seizure in the hospital is a fit at home. .06 ::A :=Mama: a husband never opening your mouth to a living soul? .06 ::A :=Mama: just any old woman now? When you have a fit, do you see stars or what? How did .07 ::A :=Jessie: move it. I said, "How long does a baby bed have to last, anyway?" But maybe .07 ::A :=Jessie: stay awake. I tried to learn to ride a horse. And I tried to stay outside with .07 ::A :=Jessie: us together for all time in too small a space. And we're tearing each other apart, .07 ::A :=Jessie: It didn't have to be anything special, a couple of boards would have been just fine, .07 ::A :=Jessie: was strong enough, it might keep Ricky a baby. .07 ::A :=Mama: He was a selfish man. He told me once he hated to .07 ::A :=Mama: He had responsibilities here. He had a wife and son here and he failed you. .08 ::A :=Jessie: Just a way of saying it, Mama. Thinking about .08 ::A :=Jessie: I have a box of things I want people to have. I'm .08 ::A :=Jessie: I made a list of all the birthdays for you. I even .08 ::A :=Jessie: Foaming like a mad dog the whole time. .08 ::A :=Jessie: O.K. Pick one, then. A good one. I think I want to know now. .08 ::A :=Jessie: It does not. It's just a sickness, not a curse. Epilepsy doesn't .08 ::A :=Jessie: I won't be here. If I'd ever had a year like this, to think straight and all, .08 ::A :=Jessie: about my list, that's all. Well, a little more than that. I was trying to .08 ::A :=Jessie: out of the box as soon as you open a new one and put them in this drawer. They'll .08 ::A :=Jessie: there is this dizzy stupid feeling a little before it, but if the TV's on, well, .08 ::A :=Jessie: all right that Cecil left. It was -- a relief in a way. I never was what he wanted .08 ::A :=Jessie: mad and I'm not afraid it will start a fit if I do, I just go ahead. .08 ::A :=Jessie: I know it means wrap them up, they're a present for Loretta's birthday. .08 ::A :=Jessie: to tell me I had fits all the time as a kid and you just told me I fell down or .08 ::A :=Jessie: It does not. It's just a sickness, not a curse. Epilepsy doesn't mean anything. .08 ::A :=Jessie: that Cecil left. It was -- a relief in a way. I never was what he wanted to see, .08 ::A :=Jessie: to go get it for you. You -- just rest a minute. .08 ::A :=Mama: I don't want a manicure! .08 ::A :=Mama: Make you feel like a freak, is that what I should have done .08 ::A :=Mama: How do you tell that to a five-year-old? .08 ::A :=Mama: You did! You were eating a popsicle and down you went. He gave it .08 ::A :=Mama: had a seizure for a solid year. A whole year, do you realize that? .08 ::A :=Mama: like a baby spitting up. I go get a wet washcloth, that's all. And then the .08 ::A :=Mama: two weeks altogether, and she had a full-time secretary job and an IQ of 1 .08 ::A :=Mama: I'm standing there poking you with a cattle prod or you're sticking your finger .08 ::A :=Mama: between five and five hundred fits a day and they lasted maybe fifteen seconds .08 ::A :=Mama: for God's sake; it's bubbling like a baby spitting up. I go get a wet washcloth, .08 ::A :=Mama: He thought you were -- you fell down a lot. That's what he thought. You were careless. .08 ::A :=Mama: You just -- crumple, in a heap, like a puppet and somebody cut the strings all .08 ::A :=Mama: fits. I read this a long time ago in a magazine, how little fits go, just little .08 ::A :=Mama: even brought this up! You haven't had a seizure for a solid year. A whole year, .08 ::A :=Mama: much to tell. You just -- crumple, in a heap, like a puppet and somebody cut the .08 ::A :=Mama: chair and had little fits. I read this a long time ago in a magazine, how little .08 ::A :=Mama: didn't know it soon enough. Maybe it's a punishment. .08 ::A :=Mama: fed you the wrong thing. Maybe you had a fever sometime and I didn't know it soon .08 ::A :=Mama: prod or you're sticking your finger in a light socket as fast as you can... .08 ::A :=Mama: this up! You haven't had a seizure for a solid year. A whole year, do you realize .08 ::A :=Mama: wasn't the first time, Jessie. You had a fit when you were five years old. .08 ::A :=Mama: You got me once real good. I had to get a tetanus! But I know what to watch for now. .09 ::A :=Jessie: I should've just left you a note! .09 ::A :=Jessie: You don't know when. Like in a scary movie. .09 ::A :=Jessie: How could I think you would want a manicure? We could hold hands for an hour .09 ::A :=Jessie: I know that. So it's really just a matter of where I'd rather be. .09 ::A :=Jessie: around over her head and chewed on a polka-dot whale and woke up knowing some .09 ::A :=Jessie: make it. Me -- who might have made a difference to me -- I'm not going to show .09 ::A :=Mama: Stay with me just a little longer. Just a few more years. I .09 ::A :=Mama: over and you can sneak them a piece of candy when their daddy's not looking .09 ::A :=Mama: thinking, "Boy, are they all in for a surprise." Well, nobody's going to be a .09 ::A :=Mama: can't, Jessie. You make me feel like a fool for being alive, child, and you are .09 ::A :=Mama: surprise." Well, nobody's going to be a bit surprised, sweetheart. This is just .09 ::A :=Mama: Stay with me just a little longer. Just a few more years. I don't have that many .10 ::A :=Jessie: I think he'll feel like a real jerk if he doesn't. Me telling him .10 ::A :=Jessie: it already. I'd like to buy him a good meal. .10 ::A :=Jessie: And all my house slippers are in a sack for her in my closet. Tell her I know .10 ::A :=Jessie: mostly stuff for the house, like a new rug in your bathroom and needlework, .10 ::A :=Jessie: Agnes could come stay with you for a few days. .10 ::A :=Jessie: you, so read it if you want. There's a list of presents for you for at least twenty .10 ::A :=Jessie: they won't. They're just things, like a free tube of toothpaste I found hanging .10 ::A :=Jessie: next Christmas. I think you'll like it a lot and you'd never think of it. .10 ::A :=Mama: Ireland. I think it just comes with a green wrapper. .10 ::A :=Mama: told me to do! I'll tell Cecil what a miserable man he was to make you feel the .10 ::A :=Mama: I do. We're not through yet. We've got a lot of things to take care of here. I don't .03 ::A&P :=Mama: store. Let's call a taxi and to the A&P! .10 ::ABLE :=Jessie: to come in. First of all, you won't be able to get in by yourself, but I don't want .01 ::ABOUT :=Jessie: It's not for my hair, Mama. What about some old pillows anywhere, or a foam .01 ::ABOUT :=Jessie: Towels you don't want anymore. How about this swimming towel Loretta gave us? .01 ::ABOUT :=Jessie: hands and don't talk to me any more about Ricky. Those two rings he took were .02 ::ABOUT :=Jessie: I told him I was worried about prowlers. He said he thought it was .02 ::ABOUT :=Jessie: On the phone with Agnes. About the milk can, I guess. Anyway, I asked .02 ::ABOUT :=Jessie: Feed store Dawson told me about. .02 ::ABOUT :=Jessie: things. He got through telling me all about the bullets and then he said we ought .02 ::ABOUT :=Mama: we better call the doctor. Or how about the ambulance. You like the one driver, .02 ::ABOUT :=Mama: ear off? You know what the doctor said about getting excited. You'll cock the pistol .02 ::ABOUT :=Mama: now. We'll just see what he has to say about this little stunt. .03 ::ABOUT :=Jessie: About? .03 ::ABOUT :=Jessie: They know about you, and they learned it before you .03 ::ABOUT :=Jessie: I shopped you up for about two weeks already. You're not going .03 ::ABOUT :=Jessie: Not a bit. I am worried about you, but I'm going to do what I can .03 ::ABOUT :=Jessie: And it's time I did something about it. .03 ::ABOUT :=Jessie: No, I don't. That's what I like about it. .03 ::ABOUT :=Jessie: He's hurt me, I've hurt him. We're about even. .03 ::ABOUT :=Jessie: it's my day, so it's mine to wonder about, not his. .03 ::ABOUT :=Jessie: make it better, make me feel better about it. Like it better, make it work. But .03 ::ABOUT :=Jessie: can't. And I can't do anything either, about my life, to change it, make it better, .03 ::ABOUT :=Mama: About what? .03 ::ABOUT :=Mama: Sad about what? .03 ::ABOUT :=Mama: O.K. Sad about what? There's nothing real sad going .03 ::ABOUT :=Mama: If you're mad about doing the wash, we can get Loretta .03 ::ABOUT :=Mama: What's this all about, Jessie? .03 ::ABOUT :=Mama: What do they know about you? I'll tell them never to talk about .03 ::ABOUT :=Mama: But I can't do anything about that! .03 ::ABOUT :=Mama: you? I'll tell them never to talk about it again. Is it Ricky or Cecil or your .03 ::ABOUT :=Mama: down? How long have you been thinking about this? .03 ::ABOUT :=Mama: job, that he's getting married, or how about he's joined the army, wouldn't that .04 ::ABOUT :=Jessie: You lied about setting the fire to all those houses .04 ::ABOUT :=Jessie: like me! She's scared of me! How about that! Scared of me. .04 ::ABOUT :=Jessie: the fire to all those houses and about how many birds she has and how much .04 ::ABOUT :=Jessie: No, that's all right. I just wondered about it. When I'm in the hospital, does .04 ::ABOUT :=Jessie: you mean. You didn't have to lie to me about Agnes. .04 ::ABOUT :=Mama: Why are you asking about Agnes? One cup or two? .04 ::ABOUT :=Mama: Why do you have to know so much about things, Jessie? There's just not that .04 ::ABOUT :=Mama: them. What's there to understand about birds? .04 ::ABOUT :=Mama: Something just downright disgusting about it. .04 ::ABOUT :=Mama: Things don't have to be true to talk about 'em, you know. .04 ::ABOUT :=Mama: for it, is all I could ever make out about it. Agnes like a feeling of accomp .04 ::ABOUT :=Mama: visit. I didn't know you ever thought about her at all. I'll tell her she just .04 ::ABOUT :=Mama: won playing Bingo, and I only told you about it because I thought I might get a .05 ::ABOUT :=Jessie: We talked about why black socks are warmer than blue .05 ::ABOUT :=Jessie: It feels good to be right about it. .05 ::ABOUT :=Jessie: then. It's just something to think about. .05 ::ABOUT :=Jessie: back and smile like the stick man was about to dance and wasn't I going to get .05 ::ABOUT :=Mama: What did you talk about? .05 ::ABOUT :=Mama: I don't like things to think about. I like things to go on. .05 ::ABOUT :=Mama: Oh no? Then what were you asking about him for? Why did you want to know if .05 ::ABOUT :=Mama: So that's why you're pestering me about Agnes. You think you can rest easy .05 ::ABOUT :=Mama: It wasn't important. We didn't talk about it. Take all these pots out to the .05 ::ABOUT :=Mama: I'm here for, but then I don't think about it. But I bet you wouldn't be killing .05 ::ABOUT :=Mama: you, too, Jessie, don't kid yourself about that. He said you were a runt and he .05 ::ABOUT :=Mama: every night. What were you whispering about? .05 ::ABOUT :=Mama: left you stuck with me and you're mad about it. .05 ::ABOUT :=Mama: But you, you knew what he was thinking about and you're going to tell me. .05 ::ABOUT :=Mama: shop, he told Dawson. They all laughed about it. And he'd come back from fishing .06 ::ABOUT :=Jessie: They said it was about time, but why didn't I take you with .06 ::ABOUT :=Jessie: What are you talking about? .06 ::ABOUT :=Jessie: What are you talking about? You liked him better than I did. You .06 ::ABOUT :=Jessie: I guess you and Agnes had a good talk about that, huh? .06 ::ABOUT :=Mama: they didn't think something was funny about that? You who doesn't go to the front .07 ::ABOUT :=Jessie: So I was quiet about it, so what? .07 ::ABOUT :=Mama: Things happen. You do what you can about them and you see what happens next. .08 ::ABOUT :=Jessie: You want to talk about fits, is that it? .08 ::ABOUT :=Jessie: Yeah, the phenobarb's about right now, I guess. .08 ::ABOUT :=Jessie: Just a way of saying it, Mama. Thinking about my list, that's all. Well, a little .08 ::ABOUT :=Mama: If I told him about you, I'd have to tell him about hi .08 ::ABOUT :=Mama: I'm not talking about the fits here, Jessie! I'm talking .08 ::ABOUT :=Mama: I can tell when you're about to have one. Your eyes get this big! .08 ::ABOUT :=Mama: What have we just been talking about? You'll be here. You're well, Jessie. .08 ::ABOUT :=Mama: the fits here, Jessie! I'm talking about this killing yourself. It has to be .08 ::ABOUT :=Mama: I don't know. Because of how I felt about your father. Because I didn't want .08 ::ABOUT :=Mama: Jessie, but I don't know what to do about it now! .08 ::ABOUT :=Mama: him about you, I'd have to tell him about him! .08 ::ABOUT :=Mama: know what he thought. He didn't think about it. .08 ::ABOUT :=Mama: that out of her life, she'd only lost about two weeks altogether, and she had a .09 ::ABOUT :=Jessie: I could go shoot myself? I'm sorry about tonight, Mama, but it's exactly why .09 ::ABOUT :=Jessie: is who is left. That's what this is about. It's somebody I lost, all right, it's .09 ::ABOUT :=Jessie: say. This is how I say what I thought about it all and I say no. To Dawson and .09 ::ABOUT :=Mama: going to feel sorry for? Me! How about that! Not you, me! They're going to .09 ::ABOUT :=Mama: you think they'll all have to talk about you now! I guess you think this will .09 ::ABOUT :=Mama: Yes. Ashamed! If somebody asks Dawson about it, he'll change the subject as fast .09 ::ABOUT :=Mama: subject as fast as he can. He'll talk about how much he has to pay to park his .10 ::ABOUT :=Jessie: Tell him we talked about him and I only had good things to say .10 ::ABOUT :=Jessie: I guess. I tried to be quiet about it. Those are just little presents. .10 ::ABOUT :=Jessie: that way. If they know we talked about it, they really won't understand how .10 ::ABOUT :=Jessie: haven't seen for years, but I thought about what you should say to get you over .10 ::ABOUT :=Jessie: him and I only had good things to say about him, but mainly tell him to find Ricky .10 ::ABOUT :=Jessie: letter is for Dawson, but it's mostly about you, so read it if you want. There's .10 ::ABOUT :=Mama: I don't think I should ask about their children. I'll talk about what .10 ::ABOUT :=Mama: ask about their children. I'll talk about what they have on, that's always good. .10 ::ABOUT :=Mama: to get away from me, Jessie. I'm not about to let you... .02 ::ABSOLUTELY :=Jessie: them if he told them to. And he was absolutely right. Here they are. .03 ::ACCIDENT :=Mama: By accident! .03 ::ACCIDENT :=Mama: Family is just accident, Jessie. It's nothing personal, .08 ::ACCIDENT :=Jessie: I fell off the horse. It was an accident. .04 ::ACCOMPLISHMENT :=Mama: out about it. Agnes like a feeling of accomplishment. .03 ::ACCOUNT :=Jessie: I just don't like their talk. The account at the grocery is in Dawson's name .05 ::ACROSS :=Jessie: We weren't whispering, you were just across the room. .02 ::ACT :=Jessie: If I'd known you were going to act like this, I wouldn't have told you. .02 ::ACT :=Mama: How an I supposed to act? Tell you to go ahead? O.K. by me, sugar? .08 ::ACT :=Mama: to. I can take it. You don't have to act like you're just visiting here, Jessie. .03 ::ACTING :=Mama: You're acting like some little brat, Jessie. You're .03 ::ADD :=Jessie: to? I've got a note to him. I'll add that to it if you want. .03 ::ADD :=Jessie: them what we need and tell them to add on cigarettes until it gets to fifteen .10 ::ADD :=Jessie: you want anything special you better add it to this list before you give it to .08 ::ADDED :=Jessie: remembering, I could see what it all added up to. .07 ::ADMIT :=Mama: I married you off to the wrong man, I admit that. So I took you in when he left. .05 ::ADVANTAGE :=Mama: not to talk to me and he took full advantage of it. .02 ::AFRAID :=Mama: Jessie, for the most part. We're all afraid to die. .04 ::AFRAID :=Jessie: Or did she see me have a fit and's afraid I might have another one if she came .08 ::AFRAID :=Jessie: worrying or getting mad and I'm not afraid it will start a fit if I do, I just .09 ::AFRAID :=Jessie: Afraid of what? .09 ::AFRAID :=Mama: I'm afraid of it, for me, I mean. When my time .09 ::AFRAID :=Mama: And you're not afraid? .03 ::AFTER :=Mama: real sad going on right now. If it was after your divorce or something, that would .05 ::AFTER :=Jessie: I thought it might be better for you after he died. You'd get interested in things. .05 ::AFTER :=Mama: had those quiet little conversations after supper every night. What were you whispering .06 ::AFTER :=Jessie: taking a little holiday and to look after you. .07 ::AFTER :=Mama: to see people move into his houses after he built them. He knew they'd mess .08 ::AFTER :=Jessie: I wouldn't remember where I put them after I washed them, but now I know it means .09 ::AFTER :=Jessie: maybe it's not so strange. Anyway, after Christmas, after I decided to do this, .09 ::AFTER :=Jessie: so strange. Anyway, after Christmas, after I decided to do this, I would wonder, .09 ::AFTER :=Mama: do it. How can I live with myself after th is, Jessie? .10 ::AFTERWARD :=Jessie: be sure to invite enough people home afterward so you get enough food to feed .01 ::AGAIN :=Mama: I think maybe Dawson's been in it again. I ought to put a big mirror on the .03 ::AGAIN :=Mama: doesn't ever have to come over here again. Dawson can just leave her at home .03 ::AGAIN :=Mama: you sick? If your gums are swelling again, we can get you to the dentist in the .03 ::AGAIN :=Mama: them ever setting foot in this house again. .03 ::AGAIN :=Mama: I'll tell them never to talk about it again. Is it Ricky or Cecil or your fits .07 ::AGAIN :=Mama: Jessie, Cecil might be ready to try it again, honey, that happens sometimes. Go .09 ::AGAIN :=Jessie: Sure you can. You just did. Say it again. .09 ::AGAIN :=Mama: gone home and left you to your quiet again. .10 ::AGAIN :=Mama: I guess. Want me to wash my hands again? .05 ::AGAINST :=Mama: what he married, and then he held it against me the rest of my life like I was .01 ::AGNES :=Mama: got you to bring down that milk can. Agnes Fletcher sold hers to somebody with .02 ::AGNES :=Jessie: On the phone with Agnes. About the milk can, I guess. Anyway, .04 ::AGNES :=Jessie: Why Agnes likes them, for one thing. Why they .04 ::AGNES :=Jessie: You talk to Agnes today? .04 ::AGNES :=Jessie: Do you know how much okra Agnes eats? .04 ::AGNES :=Jessie: You didn't have to lie to me about Agnes. .04 ::AGNES :=Jessie: means. How they fly. What they think Agnes is. .04 ::AGNES :=Mama: That's Agnes. "Jessie's shook the hand of death .04 ::AGNES :=Mama: I'm serious! Agnes Fletcher's burned down every house .04 ::AGNES :=Mama: Why are you asking about Agnes? One cup or two? .04 ::AGNES :=Mama: 'Cause nobody ever got hurt, I guess. Agnes woke everybody up to watch the fires .04 ::AGNES :=Mama: is all I could ever make out about it. Agnes like a feeling of accomplishment. .05 ::AGNES :=Jessie: Agnes. .05 ::AGNES :=Jessie: year and you want to go picking with Agnes. .05 ::AGNES :=Jessie: birds bothered you, well, one day when Agnes is out getting her hair done, you could .05 ::AGNES :=Mama: Agnes gets more talk out of her birds than .05 ::AGNES :=Mama: Well, I don't want to live with Agnes. I barely want to talk with Agnes. .05 ::AGNES :=Mama: go back, that's all. I'm not letting Agnes near this place. You don't get off .05 ::AGNES :=Mama: with Agnes. I barely want to talk with Agnes. She's just around. We go back, that's .05 ::AGNES :=Mama: So that's why you're pestering me about Agnes. You think you can rest easy if you .06 ::AGNES :=Jessie: I guess you and Agnes had a good talk about that, huh? .09 ::AGNES :=Jessie: know. For the rest of your life. For Agnes burning down one more house or Dawson .10 ::AGNES :=Jessie: And Agnes will be there, so you might not have .10 ::AGNES :=Jessie: Maybe Agnes could come stay with you for a few .10 ::AGNES :=Jessie: And pick some songs you like or let Agnes pick, she'll know exactly which ones. .10 ::AGNES :=Jessie: then call the police, and then call Agnes. And then you'll need something to .06 ::AGNES'S :=Mama: She was Agnes's girl, Carlene. Judge for yoursel .02 ::AGO :=Jessie: feel stupid for not doing it ten years ago. .04 ::AGO :=Mama: was a girl, Jess, not now. Long time ago. But she's still got it in her, I'm sure .08 ::AGO :=Mama: little fits. I read this a long time ago in a magazine, how little fits go, just .02 ::AHEAD :=Jessie: just in time to help you clean up. Go ahead, call him. Then call the police. Then .02 ::AHEAD :=Mama: an I supposed to act? Tell you to go ahead? O.K. by me, sugar? Might try it myself. .08 ::AHEAD :=Jessie: it will start a fit if I do, I just go ahead. .04 ::AIN'T :=Mama: and you can understand or not, but I ain't comin'. I'll come up the driveway, .04 ::AIN'T :=Mama: the chance it's catching, Thelma, so I ain't comin' over, and you can understand .08 ::AIR :=Mama: you sound like you're gagging, sucking air in and out like you can't breathe. .02 ::ALARM :=Mama: be quiet at all. What if it's like an alarm clock and you can't wake up so you .03 ::ALIVE :=Mama: I'll sing till morning to keep you alive, Jessie, please! .05 ::ALIVE :=Mama: be killing yourself if he were still alive. That's a fine thing to figure out, .09 ::ALIVE :=Mama: Jessie, you've got the guts to stay alive. .09 ::ALIVE :=Mama: make it better, convince you to stay alive, and I couldn't do it. How can I live .09 ::ALIVE :=Mama: You make me feel like a fool for being alive, child, and you are so wrong! I like .01 ::ALL :=Jessie: hands till I get back or it's no go, all right? .01 ::ALL :=Jessie: too. There's even a churn. I'll get it all if you want. .01 ::ALL :=Mama: It's not a floor at all, hon, it's a board now and then. Measure .01 ::ALL :=Mama: a call and he'll say he's sorry for all the trouble he's caused and invite you .01 ::ALL :=Mama: all chipped, see? I've been waiting all week, Jess. It's Saturday night, sug .01 ::ALL :=Mama: what night it is, have you? They're all chipped, see? I've been waiting all week, .01 ::ALL :=Mama: know you've felt like it, well, we've all felt like shooting somebody, but we don't .01 ::ALL :=Mama: if you want. When I die, you'll get it all, anyway. .02 ::ALL :=Jessie: And that's all. .02 ::ALL :=Jessie: I'm not, Mama. I'm cold all the time, anyway. .02 ::ALL :=Jessie: Seems O.K. I had Cecil's all ready in there, just in case I couldn't .02 ::ALL :=Jessie: in things. He got through telling me all about the bullets and then he said we .02 ::ALL :=Jessie: point in fighting me over it, that's all. Want some coffee? .02 ::ALL :=Mama: in your room. I'll leave the TV off all night. .02 ::ALL :=Mama: come, Jessie, for the most part. We're all afraid to die. .02 ::ALL :=Mama: dead is like. It might not be quiet at all. What if it's like an alarm clock and .03 ::ALL :=Jessie: All the same -- they opened it. They saw .03 ::ALL :=Jessie: It all. .03 ::ALL :=Jessie: See where all this is? Red hots up front, sour balls .03 ::ALL :=Jessie: What would you do all day? .03 ::ALL :=Jessie: Off and on, ten years. On all the time, since Christmas. .03 ::ALL :=Jessie: next door to the grocery and it'll all come out together. Be sure you talk to .03 ::ALL :=Jessie: to. He's always wondering what I do all day. I mean, I wonder that myself, but .03 ::ALL :=Jessie: nothing on I want to listen to. It's all I really have that belongs to me and .03 ::ALL :=Mama: What's this all about, Jessie? .03 ::ALL :=Mama: other things? Hurt -- You had this all ready to say to me, didn't you? Did you .03 ::ALL :=Mama: Maybe if she didn't wear that yellow all the time. .03 ::ALL :=Mama: much for me. I can fill pill bottles all day, Jessie, and change the shelf paper .03 ::ALL :=Mama: yourself. Something like -- buying us all new dishes! I'd like that. Or maybe the .04 ::ALL :=Jessie: No, that's all right. I just wondered about it. When .04 ::ALL :=Jessie: We can't go on fussing all night. I mean, I could ask you things .04 ::ALL :=Jessie: What else? Why does she wear all those whistles around her neck? .04 ::ALL :=Jessie: out of you, this is going to take all night. .04 ::ALL :=Jessie: You lied about setting the fire to all those houses and about how many birds .04 ::ALL :=Mama: know you ever thought about her at all. I'll tell her she just has to come and .04 ::ALL :=Mama: down anyway, so why wait for it, is all I could ever make out about it. Agnes .04 ::ALL :=Mama: She says a lot of stupid things. It's all that okra she eats. You can't just willy-nilly .04 ::ALL :=Mama: You put it in the pan and stir it up. All right. Fine. Caramel apples. Cocoa. .04 ::ALL :=Mama: over here, she feels like -- Well, we all like a change of scene, don't we? .04 ::ALL :=Mama: she just has to come and she'll come, all right. She owes me one. .05 ::ALL :=Jessie: I'm putting them all back in. I'm not taking them to the porch. .05 ::ALL :=Jessie: I didn't think you did, that's all. .05 ::ALL :=Jessie: her hair done, you could take them all for a walk! .05 ::ALL :=Jessie: was bad, but it's not. It's the milk, all right. .05 ::ALL :=Jessie: out of that. Or sit up with a sick cow all night and leave me a chain of sleepy .05 ::ALL :=Mama: All right. Ask me whatever you want. Her .05 ::ALL :=Mama: And throw out all the plates and cups. I'll use paper. .05 ::ALL :=Mama: We didn't talk about it. Take all these pots out to the porch! .05 ::ALL :=Mama: him around like some -- Jessie, all the man ever did was farm and sit -- .05 ::ALL :=Mama: have to, Jessie. That was probably all he'd said to me all day, Jessie. So if .05 ::ALL :=Mama: And he'd come back from fishing and all he'd have to show for it was -- a whole .05 ::ALL :=Mama: box was full of chewing tobacco and all he ever did was drive out to the lake .05 ::ALL :=Mama: She's just around. We go back, that's all. I'm not letting Agnes near this place. .05 ::ALL :=Mama: That was probably all he'd said to me all day, Jessie. So if he said it, there .05 ::ALL :=Mama: at the bait shop, he told Dawson. They all laughed about it. And he'd come back .06 ::ALL :=Jessie: They didn't bother him at all. Except he did feel responsible for it. .06 ::ALL :=Jessie: porch or I'd never even met him at all. You thought maybe he'd help you out .06 ::ALL :=Jessie: pots to cook it in? This stuff will all spoil in here, Mother. .06 ::ALL :=Jessie: to you. God knows what you thought. All that curly hair. .06 ::ALL :=Jessie: reason to call the ambulance for me. All they did for me in the emergency room .06 ::ALL :=Mama: All right! I wanted you to have a husban .06 ::ALL :=Mama: Keep the ketchup. Keep it all. .06 ::ALL :=Mama: of it! What have you been living on all these years, toothpaste? .06 ::ALL :=Mama: the cocoa. You never like eating at all, did you? Any of it! What have you been .07 ::ALL :=Jessie: "I'm sorry, Jessie, I can't fix it all for you." I said I'd always love me, .07 ::ALL :=Jessie: Ricky is the two of us together for all time in too small a space. And we're .07 ::ALL :=Jessie: He gave himself another chance, that's all. But I did beg him to take me with him. .08 ::ALL :=Jessie: Least of all me. Oh, right. That was mine to know, .08 ::ALL :=Jessie: I made a list of all the birthdays for you. I even put yours .08 ::ALL :=Jessie: You mean to tell me I had fits all the time as a kid and you just told me .08 ::ALL :=Jessie: to do with you! What if you are all I have and you're not enough? What if .08 ::ALL :=Jessie: not enough? What if I could take all the rest of it if only I didn't have .08 ::ALL :=Jessie: remembering, I could see what it all added up to. .08 ::ALL :=Jessie: better when he wasn't looking at me all the time. .08 ::ALL :=Jessie: than that. I was trying to say it's all right that Cecil left. It was -- a relief .08 ::ALL :=Jessie: to buy the cheap ones. And I've got all the ties here with the hammers and all. .08 ::ALL :=Jessie: Mama. Thinking about my list, that's all. Well, a little more than that. I was .08 ::ALL :=Jessie: year like this, to think straight and all, before now, I'd be gone already. .08 ::ALL :=Jessie: all the ties here with the hammers and all. Take them out of the box as soon as .08 ::ALL :=Mama: It wasn't all the time, Jessie. And they changed when .08 ::ALL :=Mama: He said kids have them all the time. He said there wasn't anything .08 ::ALL :=Mama: I did, but I did it, I know. This is all my fault, Jessie, but I don't know what .08 ::ALL :=Mama: You're well, Jessie. You're starting all over. You said it yourself. You're remembering .08 ::ALL :=Mama: up. I go get a wet washcloth, that's all. And then the jerks slow down and you .08 ::ALL :=Mama: a puppet and somebody cut the strings all at once, or like the firing squad in .08 ::ALL :=Mama: and let your life get away from you or all of it put together. I don't know what .08 ::ALL :=Mama: ever! You might be through with it for all time! .08 ::ALL :=Mama: I didn't want anybody to know. Least of all you. .09 ::ALL :=Jessie: is how I say what I thought about it all and I say no. To Dawson and Loretta and .09 ::ALL :=Jessie: this is about. It's somebody I lost, all right, it's my own self. Who I never .09 ::ALL :=Mama: gone! I guess you think they'll all have to talk about you now! I guess you .09 ::ALL :=Mama: Do it the hard way, that's my girl, all right. You know who they're going to .09 ::ALL :=Mama: and get just the right rain for them all summer. And Ricky will be married by .09 ::ALL :=Mama: want. Maybe with me gone, you'll have all the quiet you want, right here in the .09 ::ALL :=Mama: yourself and thinking, "Boy, are they all in for a surprise." Well, nobody's going .09 ::ALL :=Mama: No. No. I -- might not have thought of all the things you've said. .09 ::ALL :=Mama: to make it stop hurting and I was here all the time and I never even saw it. And .10 ::ALL :=Jessie: Me telling him to, like this and all. Now, this number's where you call Cecil. .10 ::ALL :=Jessie: so you might not have to talk at all. .10 ::ALL :=Jessie: back on the sofa. You had no idea. All right? I really think it's better that .10 ::ALL :=Jessie: so you get enough food to feed them all and have some left for you. But don't .10 ::ALL :=Jessie: to have it now, don't you think? And all my house slippers are in a sack for her .10 ::ALL :=Jessie: I don't want you to come in. First of all, you won't be able to get in by yourself, .10 ::ALL :=Mama: Oh. All right, then. .10 ::ALL :=Mama: When did you do all this? During my naps, I guess. .10 ::ALL :=Mama: Loretta will get all the food set up, honey. It's only fair .10 ::ALL :=Mama: No, Jessie, you've got all night! .10 ::ALL :=Mama: I think I'll stay here. All they've got is Sanka. .10 ::ALL :=Mama: I didn't know! I was here with you all the time. How could I know you were so .03 ::ALONE :=Mama: it better because I'm not letting you alone till you do. What were those other .09 ::ALONE :=Jessie: Leave me alone. .10 ::ALONE :=Mama: the time. How could I know you were so alone? Jessie! Please! Jessie, Jessie, child .05 ::ALONG :=Mama: it? I'm sitting in the mud, he comes along, drags me in the kitchen, "She's been .05 ::ALONG :=Mama: him. And it didn't mean we didn't get along. It wasn't important. We didn't talk .01 ::ALREADY :=Jessie: Took it already. .01 ::ALREADY :=Jessie: Full of shoes. I looked already. .01 ::ALREADY :=Mama: We're out of these. Did I say that already? .01 ::ALREADY :=Mama: a big mess, Jessie. It's eight o'clock already. .03 ::ALREADY :=Jessie: I shopped you up for about two weeks already. You're not going to need toilet .08 ::ALREADY :=Jessie: and all, before now, I'd be gone already. .09 ::ALREADY :=Mama: you! I can't stop you because you're already gone! I guess you think they'll all .09 ::ALREADY :=Mama: life. Who am I talking to? You're gone already, aren't you? I'm looking right through .10 ::ALREADY :=Jessie: idea. I appreciate him not stealing it already. I'd like to buy him a good meal .08 ::ALTOGETHER :=Mama: life, she'd only lost about two weeks altogether, and she had a full-time secretary .03 ::ALWAYS :=Jessie: I'll do that. If you want. I always thought if the TV was somewhere else, .03 ::ALWAYS :=Jessie: he knows who he's talking to. He's always wondering what I do all day. I mean, .03 ::ALWAYS :=Mama: Honey, nothing says those calls are always going to be some new trouble he's .04 ::ALWAYS :=Jessie: I mean, I could ask you things I always wanted to know and you could make .05 ::ALWAYS :=Mama: pipe cleaners a couple of times but he always had more somewhere. .06 ::ALWAYS :=Jessie: is the only thing I know that's always just what you think it's going to .06 ::ALWAYS :=Mama: over there, where you are? Do people always say the right thing or get whatever .07 ::ALWAYS :=Jessie: we're tearing each other apart, like always, inside that boy, and if you don't .07 ::ALWAYS :=Jessie: can't fix it all for you." I said I'd always love me, not Cecil. But that's how .07 ::ALWAYS :=Jessie: tried to stay outside with him, but he always knew I was trying, so it didn't w .08 ::ALWAYS :=Mama: Your memory's always been good. When couldn't you remember .08 ::ALWAYS :=Mama: lists, too, I've noticed that. You always know where they are now! Loretta's .08 ::ALWAYS :=Mama: couldn't you remember things? You're always reminding me what... .09 ::ALWAYS :=Jessie: because you have to. It's what you've always done. .10 ::ALWAYS :=Mama: talk about what they have on, that's always good. And I'll have some crochet work .01 ::AM :=Jessie: I am. .03 ::AM :=Jessie: Not a bit. I am worried about you, but I'm going to do .06 ::AM :=Mama: Do you remember how I used to look, or am I just any old woman now? When you have .08 ::AM :=Jessie: I sure am feeling good. I really am. The double .08 ::AM :=Jessie: I sure am feeling good. I really am. The double vision's gone and my gums .09 ::AM :=Jessie: I am what became of your child. I found an .09 ::AM :=Jessie: because I'm not -- very good company. Am I. .09 ::AM :=Mama: No. And neither am I. .09 ::AM :=Mama: noise like that in your life. Who am I talking to? You're gone already, aren't .09 ::AM :=Mama: to have my hands full someday and how am I supposed to protect myself anyhow when .02 ::AMBULANCE :=Mama: call the doctor. Or how about the ambulance. You like the one driver, I know. .06 ::AMBULANCE :=Jessie: there never was any reason to call the ambulance for me. All they did for me in .10 ::AMBULANCE :=Jessie: what happened, and by that time, the ambulance will be here and they'll come in .01 ::AN :=Jessie: Maybe an old blanket or towels we got in a soap .01 ::AN :=Jessie: I found the bullets. They were in an old milk can. .02 ::AN :=Jessie: He thought I might be taking an interest in things. He got through telling .02 ::AN :=Mama: How an I supposed to act? Tell you to go ahead? .02 ::AN :=Mama: not be quiet at all. What if it's like an alarm clock and you can't wake up so you .06 ::AN :=Jessie: and he leaves the order blanks in an egg box, and you give the bills to Dawson .06 ::AN :=Jessie: the bottom drawer of your dresser in an old Milk of Magnesia box. Cecil left me .08 ::AN :=Jessie: If I'd known I was an epileptic, Mama, I wouldn't have ridden .08 ::AN :=Jessie: I fell off the horse. It was an accident. .08 ::AN :=Mama: she had a full-time secretary job and an IQ of 120. .09 ::AN :=Jessie: a manicure? We could hold hands for an hour and then I could go shoot myself? .09 ::AN :=Jessie: I am what became of your child. I found an old baby picture of me. And it was somebody .10 ::AN :=Jessie: doorbell ring and I don't care if it's an hour, you keep washing that pan. .01 ::AND :=Jessie: And I told you -- The gun is for me. .01 ::AND :=Jessie: And a big piece of plastic like a rubber .01 ::AND :=Jessie: I'll go back and get it in a minute. There's a wagon wheel .01 ::AND :=Jessie: Then wash your hands and don't talk to me any more about Ricky. .01 ::AND :=Jessie: Every word. Wash your hands and that's the last time I'm telling you .01 ::AND :=Jessie: in the attic? I looked your whole nap and couldn't find it anywhere. .01 ::AND :=Jessie: maybe you're just brushing your teeth and you hear this -- noise down the hall .01 ::AND :=Jessie: your hands washed. I'll be right back. And get 'em real dry. You dry your hands .01 ::AND :=Mama: And I told you, we don't get criminals out .01 ::AND :=Mama: Ricky will grow out of this and be a real fine boy, Jess. But I have .01 ::AND :=Mama: sugar. Put it on the list, O.K.? And we're out of Hershey bars, and where's .01 ::AND :=Mama: O.K.? And we're out of Hershey bars, and where's that peanut brittle? I think .01 ::AND :=Mama: a floor at all, hon, it's a board now and then. Measure this for me. I need six .01 ::AND :=Mama: sorry for all the trouble he's caused and invite you out for supper someplace .01 ::AND :=Mama: before you have a fit. I can't come up and get you, you know. .01 ::AND :=Mama: get a job or one day you'll get a call and he'll say he's sorry for all the trouble .02 ::AND :=Jessie: And that's all. .02 ::AND :=Jessie: Dead is everybody and everything I ever knew, gone. Dead is .02 ::AND :=Jessie: I have to go in the bedroom and lock the door behind me so they won't .02 ::AND :=Jessie: telling me all about the bullets and then he said we ought to talk like this .02 ::AND :=Jessie: It's exactly what I want. It's dark and quiet. .02 ::AND :=Jessie: the funeral home. Then call Loretta and see if she'll do your nails. .02 ::AND :=Jessie: phone, I'll just walk in the bedroom and lock the door. Dawson will get here just .02 ::AND :=Jessie: they'd send them if he told them to. And he was absolutely right. Here they a .02 ::AND :=Jessie: want anybody else over here. Just you and me. If Dawson comes over, it'll make .02 ::AND :=Jessie: you if you wanted that swimming towel and you said you didn't. .02 ::AND :=Jessie: got me a new housecoat, pink probably, and Dawson got me new slippers, too small, .02 ::AND :=Jessie: he thought they'd send me some bullets and he said he'd just call for me, because .02 ::AND :=Mama: And then I told you where the gun was. .02 ::AND :=Mama: And where was I while this was going on? .02 ::AND :=Mama: And you can't use your father's gun, either. .02 ::AND :=Mama: excited. You'll cock the pistol and have a fit. .02 ::AND :=Mama: gun, either. It's mine now, too. And you can't do it in my house. .02 ::AND :=Mama: like every other night in the world and then you're going to kill yourself? You'll .02 ::AND :=Mama: unless you're retarded or deranged, and you're as normal as they come, Jessie, .02 ::AND :=Mama: all. What if it's like an alarm clock and you can't wake up so you can't shut it .03 ::AND :=Jessie: And it's time I did something about it. .03 ::AND :=Jessie: And that's when they took the books away .03 ::AND :=Jessie: Off and on, ten years. On all the time, since .03 ::AND :=Jessie: No. You can't. And I can't do anything either, about my .03 ::AND :=Jessie: They know about you, and they learned it before you had a chance .03 ::AND :=Jessie: I called this morning and canceled the papers, except for Sunday, .03 ::AND :=Jessie: It's O.K. Handi-Wipes and sponges under the sink. .03 ::AND :=Jessie: Oh, everything from you and me to Red China. .03 ::AND :=Jessie: I took that telephone sales job and I didn't even make enough money to pay .03 ::AND :=Jessie: even if I ride fifty more years and get off then, it's the same place when .03 ::AND :=Jessie: in the world you want to get off and the only reason in the world you don't .03 ::AND :=Jessie: bulbs in a box in the hall closet. And we've got a couple of packages of fuses .03 ::AND :=Jessie: won't deliver on Saturday anymore. And if you want your order the same day, .03 ::AND :=Jessie: What I do is tell them what we need and tell them to add on cigarettes until .03 ::AND :=Jessie: and bumpy and crowded and too noisy and more than anything in the world you want .03 ::AND :=Jessie: enough money to pay the phone bill, and I tried to work at the gift shop at the .03 ::AND :=Jessie: paper. I don't like how things are. And they're not any better out there than .03 ::AND :=Jessie: your fudge next door to the grocery and it'll all come out together. Be sure .03 ::AND :=Jessie: I'm going to say what happens to it. And it's going to stop. And I'm going to .03 ::AND :=Jessie: I'm just not having a very good time and I don't have any reason to think it'll .03 ::AND :=Jessie: all I really have that belongs to me and I'm going to say what happens to it. .03 ::AND :=Jessie: the bus. Riding the bus and it's hot and bumpy and crowded and too noisy and more .03 ::AND :=Jessie: used to ride the bus. Riding the bus and it's hot and bumpy and crowded and too .03 ::AND :=Jessie: Riding the bus and it's hot and bumpy and crowded and too noisy and more than anything .03 ::AND :=Jessie: but you call Dawson if you've got one and let him do it. .03 ::AND :=Jessie: not. They were there when it happened and it don't belong to them, it belongs to .03 ::AND :=Jessie: this one sack. New packages of toffee and licorice right in back there. .03 ::AND :=Jessie: work at the gift shop at the hospital and they said I made people real uncomfortable .03 ::AND :=Jessie: bus and it's hot and bumpy and crowded and too noisy and more than anything in the .03 ::AND :=Jessie: fuses in the fuse box. There's candles and matches in the top of the broom closet, .03 ::AND :=Jessie: happens to it. And it's going to stop. And I'm going to stop it. So. Let's just .03 ::AND :=Jessie: if the lights go out, just call Dawson and sit tight. But don't open the refrigerator .03 ::AND :=Jessie: same day, you have to call before ten. And they won't deliver less than fifteen .03 ::AND :=Jessie: this is? Red hots up front, sour balls and horehound mixed together in this one .03 ::AND :=Mama: We could get a new dog and keep him in the house. Dogs are chea .03 ::AND :=Mama: You're mad and everybody's boring and you don't have anything to do and you .03 ::AND :=Mama: and you don't have anything to do and you don't like me and you don't like .03 ::AND :=Mama: out and you don't like staying in and you never talk on the phone and you don't .03 ::AND :=Mama: Jessie, and change the shelf paper and wash the floor when I get through. You .03 ::AND :=Mama: in and you never talk on the phone and you don't watch TV and you're miserable .03 ::AND :=Mama: don't watch TV and you're miserable and it's your own sweet fault. .03 ::AND :=Mama: on the phone and you don't watch TV and you're miserable and it's your own sweet .03 ::AND :=Mama: anything to do and you don't like me and you don't like going out and you don't .03 ::AND :=Mama: like me and you don't like going out and you don't like staying in and you never .03 ::AND :=Mama: some little brat, Jessie. You're mad and everybody's boring and you don't have .03 ::AND :=Mama: just leave her at home when he comes. And we don't ever have to see Dawson either .03 ::AND :=Mama: or go to the store. Let's call a taxi and to the A&P! .03 ::AND :=Mama: can fill pill bottles all day, Jessie, and change the shelf paper and wash the floor .04 ::AND :=Jessie: Trouble and everything. .04 ::AND :=Jessie: I bought cocoa, Mama. And I'd like to have a caramel apple and .04 ::AND :=Jessie: and about how many birds she has and how much okra she eats and why she won't .04 ::AND :=Jessie: burns up? Her clothes and pillows and everything? I'm not sure I believe t .04 ::AND :=Jessie: she has and how much okra she eats and why she won't come over here. If I have .04 ::AND :=Jessie: And I'd like to have a caramel apple and do your nails. .04 ::AND :=Jessie: setting the fire to all those houses and about how many birds she has and how .04 ::AND :=Jessie: Her whole house burns up? Her clothes and pillows and everything? I'm not sure .04 ::AND :=Jessie: ask you things I always wanted to know and you could make me some hot chocolate. .04 ::AND :=Mama: Or used to. And you don't get cocoa like mine anywhere .04 ::AND :=Mama: Well, she does. And she says they just follow her home. Well, .04 ::AND :=Mama: "Like a corpse," she says, "and I'm gonna be one soon enough as it .04 ::AND :=Mama: Thelma, so I ain't comin' over, and you can understand or not, but I ain't .04 ::AND :=Mama: "Jessie's shook the hand of death and I can't take the chance it's catching, .04 ::AND :=Mama: now and she could bring the birds and come visit. I didn't know you ever thought .04 ::AND :=Mama: I'll tell her she just has to come and she'll come, all right. She owes me .04 ::AND :=Mama: What trouble? You put it in the pan and stir it up. All right. Fine. Caramel .04 ::AND :=Mama: house she ever lived in. Eight fire, and she's due for a new one any day now. .04 ::AND :=Mama: on a necklace she won playing Bingo, and I only told you about it because I thought .04 ::AND :=Mama: willy-nilly eat okra two meals a day and expect to get away with it. Made her .04 ::AND :=Mama: Jessie. I could call her up right now and she could bring the birds and come visit. .04 ::AND :=Mama: 'em. One time she set out porch chairs and served lemonade. .05 ::AND :=Jessie: You came storming out of his room and said I could wait it out with him if .05 ::AND :=Jessie: out of pipe cleaners and sit back and smile like the stick man was about to .05 ::AND :=Jessie: they'll be here. You'll bend down and get them, like you got the one for the .05 ::AND :=Jessie: ever love him, or he did something and you stopped loving him, or what? .05 ::AND :=Jessie: they'll have something to cook in, and that's the end of it! .05 ::AND :=Jessie: Or sit up with a sick cow all night and leave me a chain of sleepy stick elephants .05 ::AND :=Jessie: like you got the one for the cocoa. And if somebody else comes over here to cook, .05 ::AND :=Jessie: me a boyfriend out of pipe cleaners and sit back and smile like the stick man .05 ::AND :=Jessie: What if you leave carrots on cooking and burn up that pan? .05 ::AND :=Jessie: both of you and somebody to talk to. And if the birds bothered you, well, one .05 ::AND :=Jessie: together. Be cheaper for both of you and somebody to talk to. And if the birds .05 ::AND :=Jessie: like the stick man was about to dance and wasn't I going to get a kick out of that. .05 ::AND :=Jessie: if the strawberries are good this year and you want to go picking with Agnes. .05 ::AND :=Mama: And throw out all the plates and cups. I'll .05 ::AND :=Mama: Oh, I see. He died and left you stuck with me and you're mad .05 ::AND :=Mama: And throw out all the plates and cups. I'll use paper. Loretta can have .05 ::AND :=Mama: It made me sick to look at them and I hid his pipe cleaners a couple of times .05 ::AND :=Mama: woman and that's what he married, and then he held it against me the rest of .05 ::AND :=Mama: Dawson. They all laughed about it. And he'd come back from fishing and all he'd .05 ::AND :=Mama: He died and left you stuck with me and you're mad about it. .05 ::AND :=Mama: one big spoon, and the can opener, and put them out where I can get them. .05 ::AND :=Mama: to me and it didn't matter to him. And it didn't mean we didn't get along. It .05 ::AND :=Mama: I loved him. It didn't matter to me and it didn't matter to him. And it didn't .05 ::AND :=Mama: I wasn't here for his entertainment and I'm not here for yours either, Jessie. .05 ::AND :=Mama: about that. He said you were a runt and he said it from the day you were born .05 ::AND :=Mama: and sit in his car. Dawson told me. And Bennie at the bait shop, he told Dawson. .05 ::AND :=Mama: it. And he'd come back from fishing and all he'd have to show for it was -- a .05 ::AND :=Mama: me. He wanted a plain country woman and that's what he married, and then he held .05 ::AND :=Mama: you knew what he was thinking about and you're going to tell me. .05 ::AND :=Mama: him to get a shirt on and he went in and got one and then he said, real peaceful, .05 ::AND :=Mama: one day he was standing on the porch and I told him to get a shirt on and he went .05 ::AND :=Mama: the man ever did was farm and sit -- and try to think of somebody to sell the .05 ::AND :=Mama: Jessie, all the man ever did was farm and sit -- and try to think of somebody to .05 ::AND :=Mama: a shirt on and he went in and got one and then he said, real peaceful, but to the .05 ::AND :=Mama: he ever did was drive out to the lake and sit in his car. Dawson told me. And Bennie .05 ::AND :=Mama: he said it from the day you were born and he said you didn't have a chance. .05 ::AND :=Mama: my life like I was supposed to change and surprise him somehow. Like I remember .05 ::AND :=Mama: was his last chance not to talk to me and he took full advantage of it. .05 ::AND :=Mama: Wrapped in plastic or coming in sacks. And tuna. I like tuna. I'll eat tuna, thank .05 ::AND :=Mama: me one knife, one fork, one big spoon, and the can opener, and put them out where .05 ::AND :=Mama: paper. Loretta can have what she wants and Dawson can sell the rest. .05 ::AND :=Mama: porch and I told him to get a shirt on and he went in and got one and then he said, .05 ::AND :=Mama: tackle box was full of chewing tobacco and all he ever did was drive out to the .06 ::AND :=Jessie: And I couldn't get one on my own, of cou .06 ::AND :=Jessie: I guess you and Agnes had a good talk about that, hu .06 ::AND :=Jessie: I told them you'd run out of Cokes and you'd have to drink it. I told them I .06 ::AND :=Jessie: but why didn't I take you with me? And I said I didn't think you'd want to go, .06 ::AND :=Jessie: comes on Wednesdays and Saturdays, and he leaves the order blanks in an egg .06 ::AND :=Jessie: here. Now, I'll just call them out and you say yes or no. I know you like pickles. .06 ::AND :=Jessie: them I was taking a little holiday and to look after you. .06 ::AND :=Jessie: time, right there when you want it and real quiet. .06 ::AND :=Jessie: or what? How can you want your food and not want your pots to cook it in? This .06 ::AND :=Jessie: know the milkman comes on Wednesdays and Saturdays, and he leaves the order blanks .06 ::AND :=Jessie: because he made me choose between him and smoking. .06 ::AND :=Jessie: said I didn't think you'd want to go, and they said, "Yeah, everybody's got their .06 ::AND :=Jessie: help you out around the place, come in and get some coffee and talk to you. God .06 ::AND :=Jessie: leaves the order blanks in an egg box, and you give the bills to Dawson once a .06 ::AND :=Jessie: the place, come in and get some coffee and talk to you. God knows what you thought. .06 ::AND :=Mama: And I want to know why you've lived here .06 ::AND :=Mama: And they didn't think something was funny .06 ::AND :=Mama: And you told them you weren't going to be .06 ::AND :=Mama: Your fits made him sick and you know it. .06 ::AND :=Mama: I ever did was good enough for you and I want to know why. .07 ::AND :=Jessie: And say what? Nothing's changed. Cecil, I'd .07 ::AND :=Jessie: Yes I do and so did Cecil. Ricky is the two of us .07 ::AND :=Jessie: like there's loose boards in the floor, and you know who laid that floor, .07 ::AND :=Jessie: I tried to learn to ride a horse. And I tried to stay outside with him, but .07 ::AND :=Jessie: man, Mama. I loved Cecil so much. And I tried to get more exercise and I tried .07 ::AND :=Jessie: take me with him, but he couldn't and I understood that. I wrote that note .07 ::AND :=Jessie: I did tell him I would leave Ricky and you and everything I loved out here if .07 ::AND :=Jessie: fine, but he used that yellow pine and rubbed it smooth... .07 ::AND :=Jessie: for all time in too small a space. And we're tearing each other apart, like .07 ::AND :=Jessie: he talks. We look out at the world and we see the same thing: Not Fair. And .07 ::AND :=Jessie: me. And he knows not to try to get work, and guess where he got that. He walks .07 ::AND :=Jessie: on it, but he said it had to last, and the thing ended up weighing two hundred .07 ::AND :=Jessie: anybody and he got it straight from me. And he knows not to try to get work, .07 ::AND :=Jessie: Ricky's out there trying to get even . And he knows not to trust anybody and he .07 ::AND :=Jessie: and we see the same thing: Not Fair. And the only difference between us is Ricky's .07 ::AND :=Jessie: apart, like always, inside that boy, and if you don't see it, then you're just .07 ::AND :=Jessie: ended up weighing two hundred pounds and I couldn't move it. I said, "How long .07 ::AND :=Jessie: get even . And he knows not to trust anybody and he got it straight from me. And .07 ::AND :=Jessie: tell him I would leave Ricky and you and everything I loved out here if only he .07 ::AND :=Jessie: much. And I tried to get more exercise and I tried to stay awake. I tried to learn .07 ::AND :=Mama: here. He had a wife and son here and he failed you. .07 ::AND :=Mama: responsibilities here. He had a wife and son here and he failed you. .07 ::AND :=Mama: happen. You do what you can about them and you see what happens next. I married .08 ::AND :=Jessie: Just get the manicure tray and sit down! .08 ::AND :=Jessie: No thanks. You get the manicure and I'll be right there. .08 ::AND :=Jessie: a year like this, to think straight and all, before now, I'd be gone already .08 ::AND :=Jessie: me I had fits all the time as a kid and you just told me I fell down or something .08 ::AND :=Jessie: Davis's dogs get in it if you don't. And keep ordering the heavy black bags. It .08 ::AND :=Jessie: My head turns around and I fall down and then what? .08 ::AND :=Jessie: feeling like worrying or getting mad and I'm not afraid it will start a fit if .08 ::AND :=Jessie: with you! What if you are all I have and you're not enough? What if I could take .08 ::AND :=Jessie: yours on it. So you can call Loretta and remind her. .08 ::AND :=Jessie: I really am. The double vision's gone and my gums aren't swelling. No rashes or .08 ::AND :=Jessie: It doesn't pay to buy the cheap ones. And I've got all the ties here with the hammers .08 ::AND :=Jessie: just told me I fell down or something and it wasn't till I had the fit when Cecil .08 ::AND :=Jessie: the box as soon as you open a new one and put them in this drawer. They'll get .08 ::AND :=Jessie: to turn around or hear myself scream. And sometimes there is this dizzy stupid .08 ::AND :=Jessie: I'm not laughing. My head turns around and I fall down and then what? .08 ::AND :=Jessie: drawer. They'll get lost if you don't, and rubber bands or something else won't .08 ::AND :=Jessie: got all the ties here with the hammers and all. Take them out of the box as soon .08 ::AND :=Jessie: mean on my lists. I see 'dish towels,' and I used to wonder whether I was supposed .08 ::AND :=Mama: Your mouth bites down and I have to get your tongue out of the .08 ::AND :=Mama: Well, your chest squeezes in and out, and you sound like you're gagging, .08 ::AND :=Mama: It wasn't all the time, Jessie. And they changed when you started to school. .08 ::AND :=Mama: five and five hundred fits a day and they lasted maybe fifteen seconds apiece, .08 ::AND :=Mama: But I know what to watch for now. And then you turn blue and the jerks start .08 ::AND :=Mama: all. And then the jerks slow down and you wet yourself and it's over. Two minutes .08 ::AND :=Mama: maybe their eyes don't even close and people just call them "thinking spel .08 ::AND :=Mama: This lady had anywhere between five and five hundred fits a day and they lasted .08 ::AND :=Mama: You did! You were eating a popsicle and down you went. He gave it to you. It's .08 ::AND :=Mama: it down to you like your green eyes and your straight hair. It's not my faul .08 ::AND :=Mama: like you're gagging, sucking air in and out like you can't breathe. .08 ::AND :=Mama: -- crumple, in a heap, like a puppet and somebody cut the strings all at once, .08 ::AND :=Mama: here with the two of you turning off and on like light bulbs some nights. .08 ::AND :=Mama: in this story had kept track of hers and she'd had eighty thousand of them in .08 ::AND :=Mama: jerks slow down and you wet yourself and it's over. Two minutes tops. .08 ::AND :=Mama: I go get a wet washcloth, that's all. And then the jerks slow down and you wet .08 ::AND :=Mama: Well, your chest squeezes in and out, and you sound like you're gagging, sucking .08 ::AND :=Mama: and she had a full-time secretary job and an IQ of 120. .08 ::AND :=Mama: off to the wrong man or I took you in and let your life get away from you or all .08 ::AND :=Mama: only lost about two weeks altogether, and she had a full-time secretary job and .08 ::AND :=Mama: thing. Maybe you had a fever sometime and I didn't know it soon enough. Maybe it's .08 ::AND :=Mama: up someplace nice, O.K.? But, Jessie, and this is the reason I even brought this .08 ::AND :=Mama: watch for now. And then you turn blue and the jerks start up. Like I'm standing .08 ::AND :=Mama: Let's take Loretta to Howard Johnson's and have those fried clams. I know you love .08 ::AND :=Mama: fits, too. I think he sat in his chair and had little fits. I read this a long time .08 ::AND :=Mama: get you cleaned up before he gets here and I make him leave before you wake up. .08 ::AND :=Mama: it yourself. You're remembering things and... .09 ::AND :=Jessie: We could hold hands for an hour and then I could go shoot myself? I'm sorry .09 ::AND :=Jessie: somebody who cried and got fed, and reached up and got held and kicked but .09 ::AND :=Jessie: and epilepsy and Ricky and Cecil and you. And me. And hope. I say no! Just .09 ::AND :=Jessie: and the Red Chinese and epilepsy and Ricky and Cecil and you. And me. And .09 ::AND :=Jessie: some new trick nearly every day, and rolled over and drooled on the sheet .09 ::AND :=Jessie: nearly every day, and rolled over and drooled on the sheet and felt your hand .09 ::AND :=Jessie: I found an old baby picture of me. And it was somebody else, not me. It was .09 ::AND :=Jessie: else, not me. It was somebody pink and fat who never heard of sick and lonely, .09 ::AND :=Jessie: Somebody who mainly just laid there and laughed at the colors waving around over .09 ::AND :=Jessie: and I say no. To Dawson and Loretta and the Red Chinese and epilepsy and Ricky .09 ::AND :=Jessie: and kicked but didn't hurt anybody, and slept whenever she wanted to, just by .09 ::AND :=Jessie: about it all and I say no. To Dawson and Loretta and the Red Chinese and epilepsy .09 ::AND :=Jessie: and Ricky and Cecil and you. And me. And hope. I say no! Just let me go easy, .09 ::AND :=Jessie: even. I'm what was worth waiting for and I didn't make it. Me -- who might have .09 ::AND :=Jessie: got fed, and reached up and got held and kicked but didn't hurt anybody, and slept .09 ::AND :=Jessie: head and chewed on a polka-dot whale and woke up knowing some new trick nearly .09 ::AND :=Jessie: pink and fat who never heard of sick and lonely, somebody who cried and got fed, .09 ::AND :=Jessie: rolled over and drooled on the sheet and felt your hand pulling my quilt back .09 ::AND :=Jessie: to stay, except to keep you company, and that's -- not reason enough because I'm .09 ::AND :=Jessie: up over me. That's who I started out and this is who is left. That's what this .09 ::AND :=Jessie: Somebody I waited for who never came. And never will. So, see, it doesn't much .09 ::AND :=Jessie: Who I never was. Or who I tried to be and never got there. Somebody I waited for .09 ::AND :=Jessie: epilepsy and Ricky and Cecil and you. And me. And hope. I say no! Just let me go .09 ::AND :=Jessie: how I say what I thought about it all and I say no. To Dawson and Loretta and the .09 ::AND :=Jessie: who cried and got fed, and reached up and got held and kicked but didn't hurt anybody, .09 ::AND :=Jessie: Dawson and Loretta and the Red Chinese and epilepsy and Ricky and Cecil and you. .09 ::AND :=Jessie: here, what might be worth staying for, and you know what it was? It was maybe if .09 ::AND :=Jessie: of sick and lonely, somebody who cried and got fed, and reached up and got held .09 ::AND :=Jessie: the Red Chinese and epilepsy and Ricky and Cecil and you. And me. And hope. I say .09 ::AND :=Jessie: the colors waving around over her head and chewed on a polka-dot whale and woke .09 ::AND :=Jessie: up! This is the other thing I'm trying . And I'm sure there are some other things .09 ::AND :=Mama: And you're not afraid? .09 ::AND :=Mama: No. And neither am I. .09 ::AND :=Mama: Jessie. I can't just sit here and say O.K., kill yourself if you want .09 ::AND :=Mama: to tell me to stand up straight and say how nice I look in my pink dress, .09 ::AND :=Mama: put in some begonias up the walk and get just the right rain for them all .09 ::AND :=Mama: you've been laughing to yourself and thinking, "Boy, are they all in for a .09 ::AND :=Mama: And Ricky will be married by then and he'll bring your grandbabies over and .09 ::AND :=Mama: to be out there making the coffee and watching me get older every day, and .09 ::AND :=Mama: have that many more to go, Jessie. And as soon as I'm dead, you can do whatever .09 ::AND :=Mama: you want, right here in the house. And maybe one day you'll put in some begonias .09 ::AND :=Mama: be real glad when they've gone home and left you to your quiet again. .09 ::AND :=Mama: hurting and I was here all the time and I never even saw it. And then you gave .09 ::AND :=Mama: like a fool for being alive, child, and you are so wrong! I like it here, and .09 ::AND :=Mama: me go, until they drag me screaming and I mean screeching into my grave, and .09 ::AND :=Mama: the right rain for them all summer. And Ricky will be married by then and he'll .09 ::AND :=Mama: and I mean screeching into my grave, and you're real smart to get away before .09 ::AND :=Mama: and watching me get older every day, and you're supposed to help me die when the .09 ::AND :=Mama: candy when their daddy's not looking and then be real glad when they've gone home .09 ::AND :=Mama: for me to have my hands full someday and how am I supposed to protect myself anyhow .09 ::AND :=Mama: when I don't know what he looks like and I don't know how he sounds coming up .09 ::AND :=Mama: all the time and I never even saw it. And then you gave me this chance to make .09 ::AND :=Mama: and he'll bring your grandbabies over and you can sneak them a piece of candy when .09 ::AND :=Mama: and you are so wrong! I like it here, and I will stay here until they make me go, .09 ::AND :=Mama: kill yourself to make it stop hurting and I was here all the time and I never even .09 ::AND :=Mama: my milk. You're supposed to go around and lock up so I know we're safe for the .09 ::AND :=Mama: say how nice I look in my pink dress, and drink my milk. You're supposed to go .09 ::AND :=Mama: You can keep trying. You can get brave and try some more . You don't have to give .09 ::AND :=Mama: hate the quiet and I don't want to die and I don't want you to go, Jessie. How can .09 ::AND :=Mama: it better, convince you to stay alive, and I couldn't do it. How can I live with .09 ::AND :=Mama: not like you, Jessie. I hate the quiet and I don't want to die and I don't want .09 ::AND :=Mama: up so I know we're safe for the night, and when I wake up, you're supposed to be .10 ::AND :=Jessie: And Agnes will be there, so you might not .10 ::AND :=Jessie: And be sure to invite enough people home .10 ::AND :=Jessie: And it won't be so bad once your friends .10 ::AND :=Jessie: And pick some songs you like or let Agnes .10 ::AND :=Jessie: Don't try and stop me, Mama, you can't do it. .10 ::AND :=Jessie: We made some hot chocolate and put the cover back on the sofa. You had .10 ::AND :=Jessie: I think you'll like it a lot and you'd never think of it. .10 ::AND :=Jessie: Tell him we talked about him and I only had good things to say about him, .10 ::AND :=Jessie: bound to ask you why I did it and you just say you don't know. That you .10 ::AND :=Jessie: It's Granny's ring she gave me and I thought you might like to have it, .10 ::AND :=Jessie: I don't want you to wake Dawson and Loretta when you call. I want them to .10 ::AND :=Jessie: do that gunpowder test, I guess, and ask you what happened, and by that time, .10 ::AND :=Jessie: will be here and they'll come in and get me and you know how that goes. You .10 ::AND :=Jessie: Call Dawson, then call the police, and then call Agnes. And then you'll need .10 ::AND :=Jessie: of our lives, and then I came over and kissed you and said, "'Night, Mother," .10 ::AND :=Jessie: "I appreciate your coming, Connie." And then ask how their garden was this summer .10 ::AND :=Jessie: I guess, and ask you what happened, and by that time, the ambulance will be here .10 ::AND :=Jessie: Tonight is private, yours and mine, and I don't want anybody else to have any .10 ::AND :=Jessie: and then I came over and kissed you and said, "'Night, Mother," and you heard .10 ::AND :=Jessie: but then he saw one he liked better and he couldn't bring both of them home with .10 ::AND :=Jessie: goes. You stay out here with Dawson and Loretta. You keep Dawson out here. I .10 ::AND :=Jessie: pan till you hear the doorbell ring and I don't care if it's an hour, you keep .10 ::AND :=Jessie: she'll know exactly which ones. Oh, and I had your dress cleaned that you wore .10 ::AND :=Jessie: fit and I've never worn any of them, and make sure Dawson hears you tell her that. .10 ::AND :=Jessie: for at least twenty more Christmases and birthdays, so if you want anything special .10 ::AND :=Jessie: her to have it now, don't you think? And all my house slippers are in a sack for .10 ::AND :=Jessie: like every other night of our lives, and then I came over and kissed you and said, .10 ::AND :=Jessie: see their flowers, they'd like that. And When they say, "I'm so sorry, Thelma," .10 ::AND :=Jessie: you call. I want them to still be up and dressed so they can get right over. .10 ::AND :=Jessie: you get enough food to feed them all and have some left for you. But don't let .10 ::AND :=Jessie: call the police, and then call Agnes. And then you'll need something to do till .10 ::AND :=Jessie: doesn't. Me telling him to, like this and all. Now, this number's where you call .10 ::AND :=Jessie: he gets some good dope with it, Mama. And the rest of this is for you. .10 ::AND :=Jessie: say you don't know. That you loved me and you know I loved you and we just sat .10 ::AND :=Jessie: something for him, out here, from me, and to come get it. .10 ::AND :=Jessie: that time, the ambulance will be here and they'll come in and get me and you know .10 ::AND :=Jessie: you call Cecil. I called it last week and he answered, so I know he still ther .10 ::AND :=Jessie: you loved me and you know I loved you and we just sat around tonight like every .10 ::AND :=Jessie: and you heard me close my bedroom door and the next thing you heard was the shot. .10 ::AND :=Jessie: be here and they'll come in and get me and you know how that goes. You stay out .10 ::AND :=Jessie: him, but mainly tell him to find Ricky and tell him what I did, and tell Ricky you .10 ::AND :=Jessie: house, like a new rug in your bathroom and needlework, but next Christmas, you're .10 ::AND :=Jessie: kissed you and said, "'Night, Mother," and you heard me close my bedroom door and .10 ::AND :=Jessie: my closet. Tell her I know they'll fit and I've never worn any of them, and make .10 ::AND :=Jessie: the next thing you heard was the shot. And whatever reasons I had, well, you guess .10 ::AND :=Jessie: to find Ricky and tell him what I did, and tell Ricky you have something for him, .10 ::AND :=Jessie: It's private. Tonight is private, yours and mine, and I don't want anybody else to .10 ::AND :=Mama: And you think he'll go for it? .10 ::AND :=Mama: What if Dawson and Loretta want me to go home with them .10 ::AND :=Mama: I'll make my calls and then I'll just sit. I won't need something .10 ::AND :=Mama: Is that what I tell Dawson and Loretta, too? We sat around, you kissed .10 ::AND :=Mama: watch to Dawson if I feel like it and the only way you can make sure I do what .10 ::AND :=Mama: do what you want is you come out here and make me, Jessie! Jessie! Stop this! I .10 ::AND :=Mama: don't know where my prescriptions are and you didn't tell me what to tell Dr. Davis .10 ::AND :=Mama: too! I'll stand in front of this hall and you can't get past me. You'll have to .10 ::AND :=Mama: he was to make you feel the way he did and I'll give Ricky's watch to Dawson if .10 ::AND :=Mama: what they have on, that's always good. And I'll have some crochet work with me. .04 ::AND'S :=Jessie: sometime? Or did she see me have a fit and's afraid I might have another one if .03 ::ANOTHER :=Mama: Let's get another dog, Jessie! You liked a big dog, .03 ::ANOTHER :=Mama: just watch me. You don't have to do another thing in this house if you don't .03 ::ANOTHER :=Mama: you'd kept your little house or found another place when Cecil left you, you'd .04 ::ANOTHER :=Jessie: have a fit and's afraid I might have another one if she came over, or what? .04 ::ANOTHER :=Mama: using the pay phone because she had another little fire problem at home. .07 ::ANOTHER :=Jessie: did the right thing. He gave himself another chance, that's all. But I did beg .08 ::ANOTHER :=Jessie: But I didn't have another one. .08 ::ANOTHER :=Mama: wasn't anything to do but wait for another one. .08 ::ANOTHER :=Mama: You bet it is. You might never have another one, ever! You might be through with .10 ::ANSWERED :=Jessie: Cecil. I called it last week and he answered, so I know he still there. .01 ::ANY :=Jessie: We got any old towels? .01 ::ANY :=Jessie: wash your hands and don't talk to me any more about Ricky. Those two rings he .02 ::ANY :=Jessie: Dawson doesn't have any more to do with this. .02 ::ANY :=Mama: If he had any idea... .03 ::ANY :=Jessie: I can't do any of that nice work, Mama. .03 ::ANY :=Jessie: I can't say it any better. .03 ::ANY :=Jessie: a very good time and I don't have any reason to think it'll get anything but .03 ::ANY :=Jessie: like how things are. And they're not any better out there than they are in he .03 ::ANY :=Jessie: the hospital. I could have a seizure any time. What good would a job do? The kind .03 ::ANY :=Mama: You didn't have any business being by yourself right then, .03 ::ANY :=Mama: That's because without him there wasn't any business, Jessie! .04 ::ANY :=Mama: fire, and she's due for a new one any day now. .05 ::ANY :=Jessie: than you did, but I didn't know him any better. .05 ::ANY :=Mama: meant for people to go around without any clothes on, they'd have been born that .06 ::ANY :=Jessie: You know there never was any reason to call the ambulance for me. .06 ::ANY :=Mama: how I used to look, or am I just any old woman now? When you have a fit, do .06 ::ANY :=Mama: You never like eating at all, did you? Any of it! What have you been living on all .07 ::ANY :=Jessie: as much like me as it's possible for any human to be. We even wear the same size .08 ::ANY :=Jessie: Mama, I wouldn't have ridden any horses. .08 ::ANY :=Mama: your father. Because I didn't want any more children. Because I smoked too much .10 ::ANY :=Jessie: and I don't want anybody else to have any of it. .10 ::ANY :=Jessie: I know they'll fit and I've never worn any of them, and make sure Dawson hears you .10 ::ANY :=Mama: Jessie! Jessie! What if I don't do any of the things you told me to do! I'll .02 ::ANYBODY :=Jessie: I don't want anybody else over here. Just you and me. .03 ::ANYBODY :=Mama: Or anybody could call us, Jessie. .07 ::ANYBODY :=Jessie: to get even . And he knows not to trust anybody and he got it straight from .08 ::ANYBODY :=Jessie: But you didn't tell anybody. .08 ::ANYBODY :=Jessie: the fit when Cecil was looking that anybody bothered to find out what was the .08 ::ANYBODY :=Mama: I didn't want anybody to know. Least of all you. .09 ::ANYBODY :=Jessie: got held and kicked but didn't hurt anybody, and slept whenever she wanted to, .10 ::ANYBODY :=Jessie: yours and mine, and I don't want anybody else to have any of it. .10 ::ANYBODY :=Jessie: have some left for you. But don't let anybody take anything home, especially L .01 ::ANYBODY'D :=Mama: to help, sugar. We don't have anything anybody'd want, Jessie. I mean, I don't even .09 ::ANYHOW :=Mama: how am I supposed to protect myself anyhow when I don't know what he looks like .01 ::ANYMORE :=Jessie: Towels you don't want anymore. How about this swimming towel Loretta .03 ::ANYMORE :=Jessie: The grocery won't deliver on Saturday anymore. And if you want your order the same .04 ::ANYMORE :=Mama: you don't get cocoa like mine anywhere anymore. .05 ::ANYMORE :=Jessie: Not anymore. He didn't mean to. I didn't have .06 ::ANYMORE :=Mama: Not anymore, I'm not. That hot chocolate was .06 ::ANYMORE :=Mama: them you weren't going to be ordering anymore? .09 ::ANYMORE :=Jessie: might work, but might work isn't good enough anymore. I need something that will .01 ::ANYTHING :=Mama: trying to help, sugar. We don't have anything anybody'd want, Jessie. I mean, .03 ::ANYTHING :=Jessie: No. You can't. And I can't do anything either, about my life, to change .03 ::ANYTHING :=Jessie: have any reason to think it'll get anything but worse. I'm tired. I'm hurt. .03 ::ANYTHING :=Jessie: crowded and too noisy and more than anything in the world you want to get off .03 ::ANYTHING :=Jessie: You know I couldn't work. I can't do anything. I've never been around people by .03 ::ANYTHING :=Mama: But I can't do anything about that! .03 ::ANYTHING :=Mama: everybody's boring and you don't have anything to do and you don't like me and .05 ::ANYTHING :=Jessie: He didn't mean anything by that, Mama. .05 ::ANYTHING :=Mama: He didn't have anything to say to me, Jessie. That's why .05 ::ANYTHING :=Mama: What if he did? It didn't change anything. .05 ::ANYTHING :=Mama: because you'd rather talk to him than anything! If I had died instead of him, he .06 ::ANYTHING :=Jessie: that day. It was his idea I could do anything if I just made up my mind to. I .07 ::ANYTHING :=Jessie: of the house. It didn't have to be anything special, a couple of boards would .07 ::ANYTHING :=Mama: knew much. How was I supposed to learn anything living out here? I didn't know enough .08 ::ANYTHING :=Jessie: It doesn't have anything to do with you! .08 ::ANYTHING :=Jessie: not a curse. Epilepsy doesn't mean anything. It just is. .08 ::ANYTHING :=Jessie: my gums aren't swelling. No rashes or anything. I'm feeling as good as I ever felt .08 ::ANYTHING :=Mama: all the time. He said there wasn't anything to do but wait for another one. .08 ::ANYTHING :=Mama: to do with me, Jessie. You can't do anything, wash your face or cut your finger, .09 ::ANYTHING :=Jessie: so you wouldn't feel bad. There wasn't anything you could say to change my mind. .10 ::ANYTHING :=Jessie: and birthdays, so if you want anything special you better add it to this .10 ::ANYTHING :=Jessie: for you. But don't let anybody take anything home, especially Loretta. .01 ::ANYWAY :=Mama: want. When I die, you'll get it all, anyway. .02 ::ANYWAY :=Jessie: test your hands for gunpowder, anyway, but you'll pass. .02 ::ANYWAY :=Jessie: Agnes. About the milk can, I guess. Anyway, I asked Dawson if he thought they'd .02 ::ANYWAY :=Jessie: I'm not, Mama. I'm cold all the time, anyway. .03 ::ANYWAY :=Jessie: Only a matter of time, anyway, Mama. When the call comes, you let .03 ::ANYWAY :=Mama: You leave the room when they come over, anyway. .04 ::ANYWAY :=Mama: you knew they were going to fall down anyway, so why wait for it, is all I could .05 ::ANYWAY :=Mama: up my cabinets I can't get down to, anyway. Throw them out. Every last one. .05 ::ANYWAY :=Mama: not going to cook. I never liked it, anyway. I like candy. Wrapped in plastic .07 ::ANYWAY :=Jessie: long does a baby bed have to last, anyway?" But maybe he thought if it was strong .09 ::ANYWAY :=Jessie: well, maybe it's not so strange. Anyway, after Christmas, after I decided .01 ::ANYWHERE :=Jessie: Mama. What about some old pillows anywhere, or a foam cushion out of a yard .01 ::ANYWHERE :=Jessie: your whole nap and couldn't find it anywhere. .04 ::ANYWHERE :=Mama: to. And you don't get cocoa like mine anywhere anymore. .08 ::ANYWHERE :=Mama: to what I'm telling you. This lady had anywhere between five and five hundred fits .07 ::APART :=Jessie: a space. And we're tearing each other apart, like always, inside that boy, and .08 ::APIECE :=Mama: and they lasted maybe fifteen seconds apiece, so that out of her life, she'd only .04 ::APPLE :=Jessie: Mama. And I'd like to have a caramel apple and do your nails. .04 ::APPLE :=Jessie: Does that mean I can't have a caramel apple? .04 ::APPLE :=Mama: -- Of course you can have a caramel apple. .05 ::APPLE :=Jessie: What if you want to make apple butter? You can't make apple butter .05 ::APPLE :=Jessie: to make apple butter? You can't make apple butter in that little pan. What if .05 ::APPLE :=Mama: Ready for your apple now? .06 ::APPLE :=Mama: You won't like the apple, either. It'll be just like the cocoa. .08 ::APPLE :=Mama: I'll make your apple now. .04 ::APPLES :=Mama: I make the best caramel apples in the world. .04 ::APPLES :=Mama: stir it up. All right. Fine. Caramel apples. Cocoa. O.K. .03 ::APPRECIATE :=Jessie: we made it together. You took me in. I appreciate that. .10 ::APPRECIATE :=Jessie: That's the idea. I appreciate him not stealing it already. I'd .10 ::APPRECIATE :=Jessie: so sorry, Thelma," you just say, "I appreciate your coming, Connie." And then .01 ::ARE :=Mama: You are not! Don't even say such a thing, Je .01 ::ARE :=Mama: What are you doing? .01 ::ARE :=Mama: There you are! .01 ::ARE :=Mama: You want me to wash 'em now or are you making your mess first? We're out .02 ::ARE :=Jessie: These are from last week. .02 ::ARE :=Jessie: And he was absolutely right. Here they are. .02 ::ARE :=Mama: Those bullets are at least fifteen years old. .03 ::ARE :=Jessie: The way things are. .03 ::ARE :=Jessie: She thinks she's better than we are. She's not. .03 ::ARE :=Jessie: not any better out there than they are in here. .03 ::ARE :=Jessie: that kind of stuff. The mousetraps are under the sink, but you call Dawson if .03 ::ARE :=Jessie: the paper. I don't like how things are. And they're not any better out there .03 ::ARE :=Mama: Then what is it? Are you sick? If your gums are swelling again, .03 ::ARE :=Mama: Honey, nothing says those calls are always going to be some new trouble he's .03 ::ARE :=Mama: dog and keep him in the house. Dogs are cheap! .03 ::ARE :=Mama: even mean to be your family, they just are. .03 ::ARE :=Mama: what is it? Are you sick? If your gums are swelling again, we can get you to the .04 ::ARE :=Jessie: Then what are the whistles for? .04 ::ARE :=Mama: Why are you asking about Agnes? One cup or t .04 ::ARE :=Mama: Your hands are cold. .05 ::ARE :=Jessie: What are you doing? .05 ::ARE :=Jessie: What if the strawberries are good this year and you want to go picking .05 ::ARE :=Jessie: We talked about why black socks are warmer than blue socks. Is that something .06 ::ARE :=Jessie: Are you going to drink ketchup from the bottle .06 ::ARE :=Jessie: What are you talking about? .06 ::ARE :=Jessie: What are you talking about? You liked him better .06 ::ARE :=Mama: What's it like over there, where you are? Do people always say the right thing .07 ::ARE :=Jessie: even wear the same size pants. These are his, I think. .08 ::ARE :=Jessie: everything to do with you! What if you are all I have and you're not enough? What .08 ::ARE :=Mama: You are. I know you are! .08 ::ARE :=Mama: The fits are over! .08 ::ARE :=Mama: You are. I know you are! .08 ::ARE :=Mama: that. You always know where they are now! Loretta's birthday isn't coming .09 ::ARE :=Jessie: other thing I'm trying . And I'm sure there are some other things that might work, .09 ::ARE :=Mama: You are my child! .09 ::ARE :=Mama: to yourself and thinking, "Boy, are they all in for a surprise." Well, nobody's .09 ::ARE :=Mama: a fool for being alive, child, and you are so wrong! I like it here, and I will .10 ::ARE :=Jessie: I tried to be quiet about it. Those are just little presents. For whenever you .10 ::ARE :=Jessie: you think? And all my house slippers are in a sack for her in my closet. Tell .10 ::ARE :=Mama: I don't know where my prescriptions are and you didn't tell me what to tell Dr. .01 ::AREN'T :=Jessie: Your hands aren't washed. Do you want a manicure or .08 ::AREN'T :=Jessie: The double vision's gone and my gums aren't swelling. No rashes or anything. I'm .09 ::AREN'T :=Mama: am I talking to? You're gone already, aren't you? I'm looking right through you! .07 ::ARMED :=Jessie: Five years for forgery, ten years for armed assault... .01 ::ARMY :=Jessie: them. You ought to call the Salvation Army before the whole thing falls in on you. .03 ::ARMY :=Mama: married, or how about he's joined the army, wouldn't that be nice? .02 ::AROUND :=Mama: We're just going to sit around like every other night in the world .03 ::AROUND :=Jessie: I want to hang a big sign around my neck, like Daddy's on the barn. .03 ::AROUND :=Jessie: I go. We're not just going to sit around tonight. I made a list of things. .03 ::AROUND :=Jessie: I can't do anything. I've never been around people by whole life except when I .03 ::AROUND :=Mama: a life to lead. Had your own things around you. Give Ricky a place to come see .04 ::AROUND :=Jessie: we do. Plus there's no birds diving around. .04 ::AROUND :=Jessie: Why does she wear all those whistles around her neck? .05 ::AROUND :=Mama: for both of us. You followed him around like some -- Jessie, all the man ever .05 ::AROUND :=Mama: If God had meant for people to go around without any clothes on, they'd have .05 ::AROUND :=Mama: want to talk with Agnes. She's just around. We go back, that's all. I'm not letting .05 ::AROUND :=Mama: He could've had that GONE FISHING sign around his neck in that chair. I saw him .06 ::AROUND :=Jessie: You thought maybe he'd help you out around the place, come in and get some coffee .07 ::AROUND :=Jessie: just didn't know how things fall down around me like they do. I think he did the .07 ::AROUND :=Jessie: work, and guess where he got that. He walks around like there's loose boards in .08 ::AROUND :=Jessie: I'm not laughing. My head turns around and I fall down and then what? .08 ::AROUND :=Jessie: Sometimes I feel my head start to turn around or hear myself scream. And sometimes .09 ::AROUND :=Jessie: there and laughed at the colors waving around over her head and chewed on a polka-dot .09 ::AROUND :=Mama: drink my milk. You're supposed to go around and lock up so I know we're safe for .10 ::AROUND :=Jessie: you know I loved you and we just sat around tonight like every other night of .10 ::AROUND :=Mama: I tell Dawson and Loretta, too? We sat around, you kissed me, "'Night Mother?" They'll .02 ::ARREST :=Jessie: lock the door behind me so they won't arrest you for killing me. They'll probably .01 ::AS :=Mama: It's plenty safe! As long as you don't go up there. .01 ::AS :=Mama: It's plenty safe! As long as you don't go up there. .02 ::AS :=Jessie: He took it as a compliment. He thought I might be taking .02 ::AS :=Jessie: to do it before he gets here. Soon as you hang up the phone, I'll just walk .02 ::AS :=Mama: retarded or deranged, and you're as normal as they come, Jessie, for the most .02 ::AS :=Mama: or deranged, and you're as normal as they come, Jessie, for the most part. .03 ::AS :=Jessie: I stay as long as I can. Besides, it's you they .03 ::AS :=Jessie: I stay as long as I can. Besides, it's you they come to .03 ::AS :=Jessie: I feel like it, I can get off. As soon as I've had enough, it's my stop. .03 ::AS :=Jessie: door. Things will stay cool in there as long as you keep the door shut. .03 ::AS :=Jessie: I feel like it, I can get off. As soon as I've had enough, it's my stop. I've had .03 ::AS :=Jessie: Things will stay cool in there as long as you keep the door shut. .03 ::AS :=Mama: I don't do it as well as you. I just meant if it tires .03 ::AS :=Mama: I don't do it as well as you. I just meant if it tires you out .04 ::AS :=Mama: up to watch the fires as soon as she set 'em. One time she set out porch .04 ::AS :=Mama: I hate milk. Coats your throat as bad as okra. Something just downright .04 ::AS :=Mama: "and I'm gonna be one soon enough as it is." .04 ::AS :=Mama: up the driveway, but that's as far as I go." .04 ::AS :=Mama: woke everybody up to watch the fires as soon as she set 'em. One time she set .04 ::AS :=Mama: I hate milk. Coats your throat as bad as okra. Something just downright disgusting .04 ::AS :=Mama: I'll come up the driveway, but that's as far as I go." .04 ::AS :=Mama: then, but she's crazy. She's as crazy as they come. She's a lunatic. .04 ::AS :=Mama: O.K. Yes, then, but she's crazy. She's as crazy as they come. She's a lunatic. .05 ::AS :=Mama: near this place. You don't get off as easy as that, child. .05 ::AS :=Mama: this place. You don't get off as easy as that, child. .06 ::AS :=Jessie: Soon as I'm through here, Mama. .07 ::AS :=Jessie: He is not. Ricky is as much like me as it's possible for any .07 ::AS :=Jessie: He is not. Ricky is as much like me as it's possible for any human to be. We .08 ::AS :=Jessie: or anything. I'm feeling as good as I ever felt in my life. I'm even feeling .08 ::AS :=Jessie: and all. Take them out of the box as soon as you open a new one and put them .08 ::AS :=Jessie: No rashes or anything. I'm feeling as good as I ever felt in my life. I'm even .08 ::AS :=Jessie: to tell me I had fits all the time as a kid and you just told me I fell down .08 ::AS :=Jessie: Garbage night is Tuesday. Put it out as late as you can. The Davis's dogs get .08 ::AS :=Jessie: night is Tuesday. Put it out as late as you can. The Davis's dogs get in it if .08 ::AS :=Jessie: all. Take them out of the box as soon as you open a new one and put them in this .08 ::AS :=Mama: right! You might as well kill me as you, Jessie, it's the same thing. This .08 ::AS :=Mama: it to me. That's right! You might as well kill me as you, Jessie, it's the .08 ::AS :=Mama: your finger in a light socket as fast as you can... .08 ::AS :=Mama: sticking your finger in a light socket as fast as you can... .09 ::AS :=Mama: about it, he'll change the subject as fast as he can. He'll talk about how much .09 ::AS :=Mama: it, he'll change the subject as fast as he can. He'll talk about how much he has .09 ::AS :=Mama: many more to go, Jessie. And as soon as I'm dead, you can do whatever you want. .09 ::AS :=Mama: have that many more to go, Jessie. And as soon as I'm dead, you can do whatever .08 ::ASHAMED :=Jessie: You were ashamed. .09 ::ASHAMED :=Mama: going to be ashamed of you. Yes. Ashamed! If somebody asks Dawson about it, .09 ::ASHAMED :=Mama: that! Not you, me! They're going to be ashamed of you. Yes. Ashamed! If somebody .02 ::ASK :=Jessie: Jesus was a suicide, if you ask me. .02 ::ASK :=Jessie: a good idea. He told me what kind to ask for. .04 ::ASK :=Jessie: on fussing all night. I mean, I could ask you things I always wanted to know and .05 ::ASK :=Mama: All right. Ask me whatever you want. Here. .09 ::ASK :=Mama: to you. Tell the truth when you ask me. Let you have your say. .10 ::ASK :=Jessie: your coming, Connie." And then ask how their garden was this summer or what .10 ::ASK :=Jessie: who did Daddy's, so if you want to ask him to do the service, that's O.K. with .10 ::ASK :=Jessie: do that gunpowder test, I guess, and ask you what happened, and by that time, .10 ::ASK :=Jessie: from now on. Now, somebody's bound to ask you why I did it and you just say you .10 ::ASK :=Mama: I don't think I should ask about their children. I'll talk about .02 ::ASKED :=Jessie: I asked you if you wanted that swimming towel .02 ::ASKED :=Jessie: About the milk can, I guess. Anyway, I asked Dawson if he thought they'd send me .03 ::ASKED :=Mama: I asked you a question. .04 ::ASKED :=Mama: I didn't lie. You never asked before! .04 ::ASKING :=Mama: Why are you asking about Agnes? One cup or two? .05 ::ASKING :=Mama: Oh no? Then what were you asking about him for? Why did you want to .09 ::ASKS :=Mama: of you. Yes. Ashamed! If somebody asks Dawson about it, he'll change the subject .07 ::ASSAULT :=Jessie: years for forgery, ten years for armed assault... .01 ::AT :=Mama: It's not a floor at all, hon, it's a board now and then. Measure .02 ::AT :=Mama: Those bullets are at least fifteen years old. .02 ::AT :=Mama: dead is like. It might not be quiet at all. What if it's like an alarm clock .03 ::AT :=Jessie: don't like their talk. The account at the grocery is in Dawson's name when you .03 ::AT :=Jessie: the phone bill, and I tried to work at the gift shop at the hospital and they .03 ::AT :=Jessie: and I tried to work at the gift shop at the hospital and they said I made people .03 ::AT :=Jessie: made people real uncomfortable smiling at them the way I did. .03 ::AT :=Mama: You're mad at me. .03 ::AT :=Mama: What happened at Christmas? .03 ::AT :=Mama: here again. Dawson can just leave her at home when he comes. And we don't ever .03 ::AT :=Mama: you, you'd have made some new friends at least. Had a life to lead. Had your own .04 ::AT :=Mama: she had another little fire problem at home. .04 ::AT :=Mama: didn't know you ever thought about her at all. I'll tell her she just has to come .04 ::AT :=Mama: why. She has a perfectly good Trimline at home. .05 ::AT :=Mama: strange. It made me sick to look at them and I hid his pipe cleaners a couple .05 ::AT :=Mama: in that chair. I saw him stare off at the water. I saw him look at the weather .05 ::AT :=Mama: in his car. Dawson told me. And Bennie at the bait shop, he told Dawson. They all .05 ::AT :=Mama: stare off at the water. I saw him look at the weather rolling in. I got where I .06 ::AT :=Jessie: They didn't bother him at all. Except he did feel responsible for .06 ::AT :=Jessie: your porch or I'd never even met him at all. You thought maybe he'd help you out .06 ::AT :=Mama: A seizure in the hospital is a fit at home. .06 ::AT :=Mama: house of yours will still be standing at the end of the world, Jessie. .06 ::AT :=Mama: like the cocoa. You never like eating at all, did you? Any of it! What have you .07 ::AT :=Jessie: I hear it when he talks. We look out at the world and we see the same thing: Not .07 ::AT :=Jessie: changed. Cecil, I'd just like to look at you, if you don't mind? No. He loved me, .08 ::AT :=Jessie: it was better when he wasn't looking at me all the time. .08 ::AT :=Mama: and somebody cut the strings all at once, or like the firing squad in some .08 ::AT :=Mama: Of course you do! You can even scream at me, if you want to. I can take it. You .09 ::AT :=Jessie: who mainly just laid there and laughed at the colors waving around over her head .10 ::AT :=Jessie: I thought you might like to look at, pictures or things you think you've lost. .10 ::AT :=Jessie: there, so you might not have to talk at all. .10 ::AT :=Jessie: There's a list of presents for you for at least twenty more Christmases and birthdays, .09 ::ATTENTION :=Mama: I'll pay more attention to you. Tell the truth when you .01 ::ATTIC :=Jessie: Where in the attic? I looked your whole nap and couldn't .01 ::ATTIC :=Mama: In the attic. .04 ::AVERAGE :=Jessie: More than the average person. .04 ::AVERAGE :=Mama: I don't know how much okra the average person eats. .07 ::AWAKE :=Jessie: get more exercise and I tried to stay awake. I tried to learn to ride a horse. .01 ::AWAY :=Jessie: door to door. I hope they put him away sometime. I'd turn him in myself if .02 ::AWAY :=Mama: this. Yes he will. He'll take the gun away. .03 ::AWAY :=Jessie: I wouldn't kill myself just to get away from them. .03 ::AWAY :=Jessie: And that's when they took the books away from me. .04 ::AWAY :=Mama: okra two meals a day and expect to get away with it. Made her crazy. .08 ::AWAY :=Jessie: here? What if the only way I can get away from you for good is to kill myself? .08 ::AWAY :=Mama: or I took you in and let your life get away from you or all of it put together. .09 ::AWAY :=Mama: my grave, and you're real smart to get away before then because, I mean, honey, .10 ::AWAY :=Mama: You'll have to knock me down to get away from me, Jessie. I'm not about to let .08 ::AWFUL-SOUNDING :=Mama: I will not. It's awful-sounding. .07 ::BABY :=Jessie: Or that baby bed he built for Ricky. I told him he .07 ::BABY :=Jessie: move it. I said, "How long does a baby bed have to last, anyway?" But maybe .07 ::BABY :=Jessie: strong enough, it might keep Ricky a baby. .08 ::BABY :=Mama: for God's sake; it's bubbling like a baby spitting up. I go get a wet washcloth, .09 ::BABY :=Jessie: became of your child. I found an old baby picture of me. And it was somebody else, .05 ::BABYSITTER :=Mama: you can rest easy if you get me a new babysitter? Well, I don't want to live with .01 ::BACK :=Jessie: I'll go back and get it in a minute. There's a wagon .01 ::BACK :=Jessie: dry. You dry your hands till I get back or it's no go, all right? .01 ::BACK :=Jessie: Get your hands washed. I'll be right back. And get 'em real dry. You dry your .01 ::BACK :=Mama: died, they told me I could have them back, but I never did like those shoes. .01 ::BACK :=Mama: just needs some time, sugar. He'll get back in school or get a job or one day you'll .02 ::BACK :=Jessie: they go with the robe, he'll say. Be back in a minute. .02 ::BACK :=Mama: So is the back yard, Jessie! Close your eyes. Stuff .03 ::BACK :=Jessie: of toffee and licorice right in back there. .03 ::BACK :=Jessie: on a whole list of numbers on the back cover of the phone book. .03 ::BACK :=Mama: Go back to your list. You're hurt by what? .03 ::BACK :=Mama: You never should have moved back in here with me. If you'd kept your .05 ::BACK :=Jessie: I'm putting them all back in. I'm not taking them to the porch. .05 ::BACK :=Jessie: boyfriend out of pipe cleaners and sit back and smile like the stick man was about .05 ::BACK :=Mama: all laughed about it. And he'd come back from fishing and all he'd have to show .05 ::BACK :=Mama: with Agnes. She's just around. We go back, that's all. I'm not letting Agnes near .06 ::BACK :=Jessie: Back where? .06 ::BACK :=Mama: Well, how could I? You're real far back there, Jessie. .07 ::BACK :=Jessie: that bridge he built over the creek in back of the house. It didn't have to be anything .08 ::BACK :=Jessie: The best part is, my memory's back. .08 ::BACK :=Jessie: but it'll take both of us to get it back on. .09 ::BACK :=Jessie: and felt your hand pulling my quilt back up over me. That's who I started out .09 ::BACK :=Mama: killer on the loose, hiding out in the back yard just waiting for me to have my .10 ::BACK :=Jessie: some hot chocolate and put the cover back on the sofa. You had no idea. All right? .01 ::BAD :=Mama: going through. Maybe he's in with some bad people. He just needs some time, sugar. .04 ::BAD :=Mama: I hate milk. Coats your throat as bad as okra. Something just downright disgusting .05 ::BAD :=Jessie: Yeah, it's pretty bad. I thought it was my memory that was .05 ::BAD :=Jessie: I thought it was my memory that was bad, but it's not. It's the milk, all ri .05 ::BAD :=Mama: family -- chickens, pigs, a dog with a bad leg -- it was creepy strange. It made .09 ::BAD :=Jessie: blame yourself, so you wouldn't feel bad. There wasn't anything you could say .10 ::BAD :=Jessie: And it won't be so bad once your friends start coming to the .01 ::BAGS :=Jessie: a rubber sheet or something. Garbage bags would do if there's enough. .08 ::BAGS :=Jessie: And keep ordering the heavy black bags. It doesn't pay to buy the cheap ones. .05 ::BAIT :=Mama: car. Dawson told me. And Bennie at the bait shop, he told Dawson. They all laughed .03 ::BALLS :=Jessie: all this is? Red hots up front, sour balls and horehound mixed together in this .08 ::BANDS :=Jessie: get lost if you don't, and rubber bands or something else won't work. .05 ::BARELY :=Mama: I don't want to live with Agnes. I barely want to talk with Agnes. She's just .03 ::BARN :=Jessie: around my neck, like Daddy's on the barn. GONE FISHING. .01 ::BARREL :=Jessie: The barrel has to be clean, Mama. Old powder, .01 ::BARS :=Mama: list, O.K.? And we're out of Hershey bars, and where's that peanut brittle? I .01 ::BASKET :=Mama: the shotgun, didn't he? Hand me that basket, hon. .10 ::BATHROOM :=Jessie: for the house, like a new rug in your bathroom and needlework, but next Christmas, .03 ::BATTERIES :=Jessie: no better place for. Extension cords, batteries for the radio, extra lighters, .01 ::BE :=Jessie: The barrel has to be clean, Mama. Old powder, dust gets in .01 ::BE :=Jessie: Get your hands washed. I'll be right back. And get 'em real dry. You .01 ::BE :=Jessie: if I didn't say it? You want it to be a surprise? You're lying there in your .01 ::BE :=Jessie: foam cushion out of a yard chair would be real good. .01 ::BE :=Mama: It must be time for your medicine. .01 ::BE :=Mama: Ricky will grow out of this and be a real fine boy, Jess. But I have to tell .02 ::BE :=Jessie: but they go with the robe, he'll say. Be back in a minute. .02 ::BE :=Jessie: it as a compliment. He thought I might be taking an interest in things. He got through .02 ::BE :=Mama: know what dead is like. It might not be quiet at all. What if it's like an alarm .03 ::BE :=Jessie: Sure he does. Be sure you clean out the lint tray every .03 ::BE :=Jessie: Oh now, that might be worth staying to see. .03 ::BE :=Jessie: and it'll all come out together. Be sure you talk to Susie, though. She won't .03 ::BE :=Mama: You'll be telling him killing is O.K. with you, .03 ::BE :=Mama: he's joined the army, wouldn't that be nice? .03 ::BE :=Mama: says those calls are always going to be some new trouble he's into. You could .03 ::BE :=Mama: your nerves. They don't even mean to be your family, they just are. .04 ::BE :=Jessie: Why they stay with her when they could be outside with the other birds. What their .04 ::BE :=Mama: Be exciting, though, if she did. You never .04 ::BE :=Mama: a corpse," she says, "and I'm gonna be one soon enough as it is." .04 ::BE :=Mama: truth, Jessie. Things don't have to be true to talk about 'em, you know. .05 ::BE :=Jessie: It feels good to be right about it. .05 ::BE :=Jessie: I thought it might be better for you after he died. You'd get .05 ::BE :=Jessie: the porch. If you want them, they'll be here. You'll bend down and get them, like .05 ::BE :=Jessie: you couldn't just live here together. Be cheaper for both of you and somebody to .05 ::BE :=Mama: think about it. But I bet you wouldn't be killing yourself if he were still alive. .06 ::BE :=Jessie: just what you think it's going to be. Just like it was the last time, right .06 ::BE :=Mama: That little house of yours will still be standing at the end of the world, Jes .06 ::BE :=Mama: And you told them you weren't going to be ordering anymore? .06 ::BE :=Mama: You won't like the apple, either. It'll be just like the cocoa. You never like eating .07 ::BE :=Jessie: back of the house. It didn't have to be anything special, a couple of boards would .07 ::BE :=Jessie: me as it's possible for any human to be. We even wear the same size pants. These .07 ::BE :=Mama: Stop that! Jessie, Cecil might be ready to try it again, honey, that happens .07 ::BE :=Mama: Or call him up! Right now! He might be home. .08 ::BE :=Jessie: Could be. .08 ::BE :=Jessie: I won't be here, Mama. .08 ::BE :=Jessie: I won't be here. If I'd ever had a year like this, .08 ::BE :=Jessie: Yeah. It felt like it might be. What's next? .08 ::BE :=Jessie: straight and all, before now, I'd be gone already. .08 ::BE :=Jessie: thanks. You get the manicure and I'll be right there. .08 ::BE :=Mama: have another one, ever! You might be through with it for all time! .08 ::BE :=Mama: we just been talking about? You'll be here. You're well, Jessie. You're starting .08 ::BE :=Mama: when I was carrying you. It has to be something I did. .08 ::BE :=Mama: that's the matter here. You wouldn't be doing this if it wasn't. I didn't tell .08 ::BE :=Mama: about this killing yourself. It has to be me that's the matter here. You wouldn't .09 ::BE :=Jessie: just a matter of where I'd rather be. .09 ::BE :=Jessie: Who I never was. Or who I tried to be and never got there. Somebody I waited .09 ::BE :=Jessie: what might keep me here, what might be worth staying for, and you know what it .09 ::BE :=Jessie: for breakfast or something, that might be enough. .09 ::BE :=Mama: their daddy's not looking and then be real glad when they've gone home and left .09 ::BE :=Mama: everything. Who knows what it might be, but it might be worth waiting for! Try .09 ::BE :=Mama: for them all summer. And Ricky will be married by then and he'll bring your grandbabies .09 ::BE :=Mama: that! Not you, me! They're going to be ashamed of you. Yes. Ashamed! If somebody .09 ::BE :=Mama: a surprise." Well, nobody's going to be a bit surprised, sweetheart. This is just .09 ::BE :=Mama: knows what it might be, but it might be worth waiting for! Try it for two more .09 ::BE :=Mama: and when I wake up, you're supposed to be out there making the coffee and watching .10 ::BE :=Jessie: And be sure to invite enough people home afterward .10 ::BE :=Jessie: And it won't be so bad once your friends start coming .10 ::BE :=Jessie: And Agnes will be there, so you might not have to talk at .10 ::BE :=Jessie: I guess. I tried to be quiet about it. Those are just little .10 ::BE :=Jessie: No, Mama. You have to be more selfish from now on. Now, somebody's .10 ::BE :=Jessie: to come in. First of all, you won't be able to get in by yourself, but I don't .10 ::BE :=Jessie: when you call. I want them to still be up and dressed so they can get right .10 ::BE :=Jessie: and by that time, the ambulance will be here and they'll come in and get me and .10 ::BE :=Jessie: does, so he gave the first one to me. Be funny for her to have it now, don't you .10 ::BE :=Jessie: you give it to him. Or if you want to be surprised, just don't read that page. .10 ::BE :=Mama: I'd rather be by myself, I think. You want me to give .10 ::BE :=Mama: can't do this. You didn't say it would be so soon, Jessie. I'm scared. I love y .01 ::BEACH :=Jessie: this swimming towel Loretta gave us? Beach towel, that's the name of it. You want .08 ::BEAT :=Mama: were careless. Or maybe he thought I beat you. I don't know what he thought. He .09 ::BECAME :=Jessie: I am what became of your child. I found an old baby .02 ::BECAUSE :=Jessie: and he said he'd just call for me, because he knew they'd send them if he told .03 ::BECAUSE :=Jessie: I can get off right now if I want to, because even if I ride fifty more years and .03 ::BECAUSE :=Mama: That's because I stay in the room when they com .03 ::BECAUSE :=Mama: That's because without him there wasn't any business, .03 ::BECAUSE :=Mama: If you're doing this because of the newspapers, I can sure fix .03 ::BECAUSE :=Mama: Well, you'll have to say it better because I'm not letting you alone till you .04 ::BECAUSE :=Jessie: It's because of me, isn't it? .04 ::BECAUSE :=Mama: Bingo, and I only told you about it because I thought I might get a laugh out .04 ::BECAUSE :=Mama: She was probably using the pay phone because she had another little fire problem .05 ::BECAUSE :=Jessie: go tell Mother? You were just jealous because I'd rather talk to him than wash .05 ::BECAUSE :=Mama: I was jealous because you'd rather talk to him than anything! .05 ::BECAUSE :=Mama: Why should I? Because he said to? Because you said to? Well I wasn't here for .05 ::BECAUSE :=Mama: A clerk in a shoe store? Why should I? Because he said to? Because you said to? .06 ::BECAUSE :=Jessie: Milk of Magnesia box. Cecil left me because he made me choose between him and .06 ::BECAUSE :=Jessie: up my mind to. I fell off the horse because I didn't know how to hold on. Cecil .08 ::BECAUSE :=Jessie: Because I've made lists for everything. But .08 ::BECAUSE :=Jessie: Because you didn't tell him! .08 ::BECAUSE :=Jessie: wash them, buy them, or look for them because I wouldn't remember where I put them .08 ::BECAUSE :=Mama: I don't know. Because of how I felt about your father. .08 ::BECAUSE :=Mama: I didn't want any more children. Because I smoked too much or didn't eat right .08 ::BECAUSE :=Mama: of how I felt about your father. Because I didn't want any more children. .09 ::BECAUSE :=Jessie: You can because you have to. It's what you've always .09 ::BECAUSE :=Jessie: and that's -- not reason enough because I'm not -- very good company. Am .09 ::BECAUSE :=Jessie: wouldn't have more talks like tonight, because it's this next part that's made this .09 ::BECAUSE :=Mama: real smart to get away before then because, I mean, honey, you've never heard .09 ::BECAUSE :=Mama: right through you! I can't stop you because you're already gone! I guess you .01 ::BED :=Jessie: a surprise? You're lying there in your bed or maybe you're just brushing your teeth .05 ::BED :=Jessie: chain of sleepy stick elephants on my bed in the morning. .07 ::BED :=Jessie: Or that baby bed he built for Ricky. I told him he didn't .07 ::BED :=Jessie: move it. I said, "How long does a baby bed have to last, anyway?" But maybe he thought .08 ::BED :=Jessie: How do I get to the bed? .02 ::BEDROOM :=Jessie: I have to go in the bedroom and lock the door behind me so they .02 ::BEDROOM :=Jessie: up the phone, I'll just walk in the bedroom and lock the door. Dawson will get .10 ::BEDROOM :=Jessie: Mother," and you heard me close my bedroom door and the next thing you heard .01 ::BEEN :=Mama: What have you been doing in there? .01 ::BEEN :=Mama: you? They're all chipped, see? I've been waiting all week, Jess. It's Saturday .01 ::BEEN :=Mama: peanut brittle? I think maybe Dawson's been in it again. I ought to put a big mirror .03 ::BEEN :=Jessie: I know that. You've just been letting me do it so I'll have something .03 ::BEEN :=Jessie: work. I can't do anything. I've never been around people by whole life except when .03 ::BEEN :=Mama: you write this down? How long have you been thinking about this? .05 ::BEEN :=Jessie: to. I didn't have to come here. We've been through this. .05 ::BEEN :=Mama: without any clothes on, they'd have been born that way." .05 ::BEEN :=Mama: along, drags me in the kitchen, "She's been there ever since."? .06 ::BEEN :=Mama: all, did you? Any of it! What have you been living on all these years, toothpas .07 ::BEEN :=Jessie: special, a couple of boards would have been just fine, but he used that yellow pine .08 ::BEEN :=Jessie: clothes on, feeling like I've been run over. Sometimes I feel my head start .08 ::BEEN :=Jessie: think you want this manicure we've been looking forward to. I washed this cover .08 ::BEEN :=Mama: What have we just been talking about? You'll be here. You're .08 ::BEEN :=Mama: Your memory's always been good. When couldn't you remember things? .09 ::BEEN :=Mama: Oh yes, ever since Christmas you've been laughing to yourself and thinking, "Boy, .01 ::BEFORE :=Jessie: You ought to call the Salvation Army before the whole thing falls in on you. Six .01 ::BEFORE :=Mama: You come down from there before you have a fit. I can't come up and .02 ::BEFORE :=Jessie: you call him, I'll just have to do it before he gets here. Soon as you hang up .02 ::BEFORE :=Mama: no good, you know. He broke it right before he died. He dropped it in the mud .03 ::BEFORE :=Jessie: If you call the Sweet Tooth before you call the grocery, that Susie will .03 ::BEFORE :=Jessie: the day. I'll do whatever you want before I go. .03 ::BEFORE :=Jessie: know about you, and they learned it before you had a chance to say whether you .03 ::BEFORE :=Jessie: you, but I'm going to do what I can before I go. We're not just going to sit .03 ::BEFORE :=Jessie: order the same day, you have to call before ten. And they won't deliver less than .04 ::BEFORE :=Jessie: Why didn't you tell me this before? Why isn't she locked up somewher .04 ::BEFORE :=Mama: I didn't lie. You never asked before! .08 ::BEFORE :=Jessie: is this dizzy stupid feeling a little before it, but if the TV's on, well, it's .08 ::BEFORE :=Jessie: like this, to think straight and all, before now, I'd be gone already. .08 ::BEFORE :=Mama: he gets here and I make him leave before you wake up. .08 ::BEFORE :=Mama: I call Dawson. But I get you cleaned up before he gets here and I make him leave .09 ::BEFORE :=Mama: and you're real smart to get away before then because, I mean, honey, you've .09 ::BEFORE :=Mama: very long or what I don't get done before it happens. .10 ::BEFORE :=Jessie: special you better add it to this list before you give it to him. Or if you want .07 ::BEG :=Jessie: another chance, that's all. But I did beg him to take me with him. I did tell him .09 ::BEGONIAS :=Mama: And maybe one day you'll put in some begonias up the walk and get just the right .02 ::BEHIND :=Jessie: to go in the bedroom and lock the door behind me so they won't arrest you for killing .09 ::BEHIND :=Mama: I don't know how he sounds coming up behind me like that or if it will hurt or .01 ::BEING :=Jessie: up there, Mama. Or maybe he's just being smart. That floor's not very stead .03 ::BEING :=Mama: You didn't have any business being by yourself right then, but I can see .09 ::BEING :=Mama: You make me feel like a fool for being alive, child, and you are so wrong! .04 ::BELIEVE :=Jessie: pillows and everything? I'm not sure I believe this. .10 ::BELIEVE :=Mama: want to know more, Jessie. They won't believe it. .03 ::BELONG :=Jessie: there when it happened and it don't belong to them, it belongs to you, only they .03 ::BELONGS :=Jessie: and it don't belong to them, it belongs to you, only they got it. Like my .03 ::BELONGS :=Jessie: listen to. It's all I really have that belongs to me and I'm going to say what happens .05 ::BEND :=Jessie: you want them, they'll be here. You'll bend down and get them, like you got the .05 ::BENNIE :=Mama: sit in his car. Dawson told me. And Bennie at the bait shop, he told Dawson. .03 ::BESIDES :=Jessie: I stay as long as I can. Besides, it's you they come to see. .04 ::BEST :=Mama: I make the best caramel apples in the world. .06 ::BEST :=Mama: He's the best carpenter I ever saw. That little house .08 ::BEST :=Jessie: The best part is, my memory's back. .05 ::BET :=Mama: but then I don't think about it. But I bet you wouldn't be killing yourself if he .08 ::BET :=Mama: You bet it is. You might never have another one, .01 ::BETTER :=Jessie: Dawson better not've taken that pistol. .02 ::BETTER :=Mama: I think we better call the doctor. Or how about the .03 ::BETTER :=Jessie: She thinks she's better than we are. She's not. .03 ::BETTER :=Jessie: I can't say it any better. .03 ::BETTER :=Jessie: it, make it better, make me feel better about it. Like it better, make it .03 ::BETTER :=Jessie: how things are. And they're not any better out there than they are in here. .03 ::BETTER :=Jessie: about my life, to change it, make it better, make me feel better about it. Like .03 ::BETTER :=Jessie: has everything in it that there's no better place for. Extension cords, batteries .03 ::BETTER :=Jessie: make me feel better about it. Like it better, make it work. But I can stop it. .03 ::BETTER :=Mama: Well, you'll have to say it better because I'm not letting you alone .04 ::BETTER :=Mama: old way, Jess. Two or three? Three is better. .05 ::BETTER :=Jessie: I thought it might be better for you after he died. You'd get interested .05 ::BETTER :=Jessie: I don't know. I liked him better than you did, but I didn't know him .05 ::BETTER :=Jessie: get interested in things. Breathe better. Change somehow. .05 ::BETTER :=Jessie: you did, but I didn't know him any better. .05 ::BETTER :=Mama: Fine then. You were right. Do you feel better now? .06 ::BETTER :=Jessie: are you talking about? You liked him better than I did. You flirted him out here .08 ::BETTER :=Jessie: time you wash this cover, it'll dry better if you put it on wet. .08 ::BETTER :=Jessie: was what he wanted to see, so it was better when he wasn't looking at me all the .09 ::BETTER :=Mama: you gave me this chance to make it better, convince you to stay alive, and I .10 ::BETTER :=Jessie: so if you want anything special you better add it to this list before you give .10 ::BETTER :=Jessie: idea. All right? I really think it's better that way. If they know we talked about .10 ::BETTER :=Jessie: you know, but then he saw one he liked better and he couldn't bring both of them .06 ::BETWEEN :=Jessie: left me because he made me choose between him and smoking. .07 ::BETWEEN :=Jessie: Not Fair. And the only difference between us is Ricky's out there trying to .08 ::BETWEEN :=Mama: telling you. This lady had anywhere between five and five hundred fits a day .01 ::BIG :=Jessie: And a big piece of plastic like a rubber sheet .01 ::BIG :=Mama: Don't go making a big mess, Jessie. It's eight o'clock alr .01 ::BIG :=Mama: been in it again. I ought to put a big mirror on the refrigerator door. That'll .03 ::BIG :=Jessie: I want to hang a big sign around my neck, like Daddy's on .03 ::BIG :=Mama: get another dog, Jessie! You liked a big dog, now, didn't you? That King dog, .05 ::BIG :=Jessie: I liked him sitting. Big old faded blue man in the chair. Qui .05 ::BIG :=Mama: No. It was a big fat lie, the whole thing. He just thought .05 ::BIG :=Mama: pan. Get me one knife, one fork, one big spoon, and the can opener, and put them .08 ::BIG :=Mama: about to have one. Your eyes get this big! But, Jessie, you haven't... .03 ::BILL :=Jessie: make enough money to pay the phone bill, and I tried to work at the gift shop .06 ::BILLS :=Jessie: blanks in an egg box, and you give the bills to Dawson once a month. .04 ::BINGO :=Mama: ones on a necklace she won playing Bingo, and I only told you about it because .04 ::BIRDS :=Jessie: How many birds does she have? .04 ::BIRDS :=Jessie: Sure we do. Plus there's no birds diving around. .04 ::BIRDS :=Jessie: they could be outside with the other birds. What their singing means. How they .04 ::BIRDS :=Jessie: I didn't know she had a house full of birds! .04 ::BIRDS :=Jessie: to all those houses and about how many birds she has and how much okra she eats .04 ::BIRDS :=Mama: I hate those birds. She says I don't understand them. .04 ::BIRDS :=Mama: Why does she have a house full of birds? .04 ::BIRDS :=Mama: up right now and she could bring the birds and come visit. I didn't know you ever .04 ::BIRDS :=Mama: them. What's there to understand about birds? .05 ::BIRDS :=Jessie: and somebody to talk to. And if the birds bothered you, well, one day when Agnes .05 ::BIRDS :=Mama: Agnes gets more talk out of her birds than I got from the two of you. He .08 ::BIRTHDAY :=Jessie: up, they're a present for Loretta's birthday. .08 ::BIRTHDAY :=Mama: know where they are now! Loretta's birthday isn't coming up, is it? .02 ::BIRTHDAY'S :=Mama: Your birthday's coming up, Jessie. Don't you want .08 ::BIRTHDAYS :=Jessie: I made a list of all the birthdays for you. I even put yours on it. .10 ::BIRTHDAYS :=Jessie: at least twenty more Christmases and birthdays, so if you want anything special .03 ::BIT :=Jessie: Not a bit. I am worried about you, but I'm going .04 ::BIT :=Mama: Wouldn't surprise me a bit. .04 ::BIT :=Mama: That's fine with me. I'm not a bit sleepy. .08 ::BIT :=Jessie: don't like this. I don't like this one bit. .09 ::BIT :=Mama: Well, nobody's going to be a bit surprised, sweetheart. This is just like .04 ::BITE :=Mama: You didn't eat a bite of supper. .08 ::BITE :=Jessie: Or you. I bite you, too, don't I? .08 ::BITE :=Mama: out of the way fast, so you don't bite yourself. .08 ::BITES :=Mama: Your mouth bites down and I have to get your tongue .01 ::BLACK :=Jessie: The box was black? .01 ::BLACK :=Mama: Black. .01 ::BLACK :=Mama: The shoes were black. .01 ::BLACK :=Mama: I said don't make a mess. Your hair is black enough, hon. .05 ::BLACK :=Jessie: We talked about why black socks are warmer than blue socks. Is .08 ::BLACK :=Jessie: you don't. And keep ordering the heavy black bags. It doesn't pay to buy the cheap .08 ::BLACKOUTS :=Mama: how little fits go, just little blackouts where maybe their eyes don't even .09 ::BLAME :=Jessie: so I could explain it, so you wouldn't blame yourself, so you wouldn't feel bad. .01 ::BLANKET :=Jessie: Maybe an old blanket or towels we got in a soap box s .06 ::BLANKS :=Jessie: and Saturdays, and he leaves the order blanks in an egg box, and you give the bills .07 ::BLIND :=Jessie: if you don't see it, then you're just blind. .03 ::BLOCKS :=Jessie: you don't get off is it's still fifty blocks from where you're going? Well, I can .05 ::BLUE :=Jessie: I liked him sitting. Big old faded blue man in the chair. Quiet. .05 ::BLUE :=Jessie: about why black socks are warmer than blue socks. Is that something to go tell .08 ::BLUE :=Mama: to watch for now. And then you turn blue and the jerks start up. Like I'm standing .01 ::BOARD :=Mama: It's not a floor at all, hon, it's a board now and then. Measure this for me. .07 ::BOARDS :=Jessie: to be anything special, a couple of boards would have been just fine, but he .07 ::BOARDS :=Jessie: got that. He walks around like there's loose boards in the floor, and you know who .05 ::BOAT :=Mama: got where I could practically see the boat myself. But you, you knew what he was .03 ::BOOK :=Jessie: numbers on the back cover of the phone book. .03 ::BOOKS :=Jessie: And that's when they took the books away from me. .03 ::BOOKS :=Mama: You could keep books. You kept your dad's books. .03 ::BOOKS :=Mama: could keep books. You kept your dad's books. .01 ::BOOTS :=Mama: I told him to take those rubber boots, too, but he said they were for fishing. .05 ::BOOTS :=Jessie: Mama! His life, I guess. His corn. His boots. Us. Things. You know. .03 ::BORING :=Mama: Jessie. You're mad and everybody's boring and you don't have anything to do .05 ::BORN :=Mama: any clothes on, they'd have been born that way." .05 ::BORN :=Mama: and he said it from the day you were born and he said you didn't have a chanc .05 ::BOTH :=Jessie: live here together. Be cheaper for both of you and somebody to talk to. And .05 ::BOTH :=Mama: though. You loved him enough for both of us. You followed him around like .08 ::BOTH :=Jessie: cover for the sofa, but it'll take both of us to get it back on. .10 ::BOTH :=Jessie: he liked better and he couldn't bring both of them home with Loretta counting every .03 ::BOTHER :=Mama: either if he bothers you. Does he bother you? .06 ::BOTHER :=Jessie: They didn't bother him at all. Except he did feel responsible .05 ::BOTHERED :=Jessie: somebody to talk to. And if the birds bothered you, well, one day when Agnes is .08 ::BOTHERED :=Jessie: when Cecil was looking that anybody bothered to find out what was the matter .03 ::BOTHERS :=Mama: What does Dawson do, that bothers you? .03 ::BOTHERS :=Mama: ever have to see Dawson either if he bothers you. Does he bother you? .06 ::BOTTLE :=Jessie: Are you going to drink ketchup from the bottle or what? How can you want your food .03 ::BOTTLES :=Mama: You do too much for me. I can fill pill bottles all day, Jessie, and change the shelf .03 ::BOTTOM :=Jessie: She won't let them put it in the bottom of a sack like that one time, rem .06 ::BOTTOM :=Jessie: They're in the bottom drawer of your dresser in an old Milk .04 ::BOUGHT :=Jessie: I bought cocoa, Mama. And I'd like to have .04 ::BOUGHT :=Mama: still paying on the last parrot she bought. You gotta keep your life filled up, .10 ::BOUGHT :=Jessie: to have my little calculator. Dawson bought it for himself, you know, but then .10 ::BOUGHT :=Jessie: For whenever you need one. They're not bought presents, just things I thought you .10 ::BOUND :=Jessie: selfish from now on. Now, somebody's bound to ask you why I did it and you just .01 ::BOX :=Jessie: The box was black? .01 ::BOX :=Jessie: old blanket or towels we got in a soap box sometime? .01 ::BOX :=Mama: look good enough, then. There's that box from the ones he wore to the hospital. .03 ::BOX :=Jessie: There's extra light bulbs in a box in the hall closet. And we've got a couple .03 ::BOX :=Jessie: of packages of fuses in the fuse box. There's candles and matches in the top .05 ::BOX :=Mama: you know. Never once. His tackle box was full of chewing tobacco and all he .06 ::BOX :=Jessie: dresser in an old Milk of Magnesia box. Cecil left me because he made me choose .06 ::BOX :=Jessie: he leaves the order blanks in an egg box, and you give the bills to Dawson once .08 ::BOX :=Jessie: I have a box of things I want people to have. I'm .08 ::BOX :=Jessie: hammers and all. Take them out of the box as soon as you open a new one and put .01 ::BOY :=Mama: grow out of this and be a real fine boy, Jess. But I have to tell you, I wouldn't .01 ::BOY :=Mama: I didn't think you would shoot your own boy, Jessie. I know you've felt like it, .07 ::BOY :=Jessie: other apart, like always, inside that boy, and if you don't see it, then you're .09 ::BOY :=Mama: laughing to yourself and thinking, "Boy, are they all in for a surprise." Well, .05 ::BOYFRIEND :=Jessie: Or make me a boyfriend out of pipe cleaners and sit back .03 ::BRA :=Jessie: only they got it. Like my mail-order bra got delivered to their house. .03 ::BRAT :=Mama: You're acting like some little brat, Jessie. You're mad and everybody's .09 ::BRAVE :=Mama: it. You can keep trying. You can get brave and try some more . You don't have .09 ::BREAKFAST :=Jessie: like rice pudding or cornflakes for breakfast or something, that might be en .05 ::BREATHE :=Jessie: died. You'd get interested in things. Breathe better. Change somehow. .08 ::BREATHE :=Mama: sucking air in and out like you can't breathe. .07 ::BRIDGE :=Jessie: I loved that bridge he built over the creek in back of .01 ::BRING :=Mama: I shoulda got you to bring down that milk can. Agnes Fletcher .04 ::BRING :=Mama: call her up right now and she could bring the birds and come visit. I didn't .05 ::BRING :=Mama: I'll tell her to bring a pan. You said you would do whatever .09 ::BRING :=Mama: will be married by then and he'll bring your grandbabies over and you can sneak .10 ::BRING :=Jessie: one he liked better and he couldn't bring both of them home with Loretta counting .03 ::BRINGING :=Mama: For bringing it up. .01 ::BRITTLE :=Mama: Hershey bars, and where's that peanut brittle? I think maybe Dawson's been in it .02 ::BROKE :=Mama: That gun's no good, you know. He broke it right before he died. He dropped .03 ::BROOM :=Jessie: candles and matches in the top of the broom closet, but if the lights go out, just .02 ::BROTHER :=Mama: He's your brother. .08 ::BROUGHT :=Mama: Jessie, and this is the reason I even brought this up! You haven't had a seizure .01 ::BRUSHING :=Jessie: there in your bed or maybe you're just brushing your teeth and you hear this -- .08 ::BUBBLING :=Mama: It's bubbling, Jess, not foam like the washer .08 ::BUBBLING :=Mama: overflowed, for God's sake; it's bubbling like a baby spitting up. I go get .04 ::BUILD :=Jessie: would she go? She can't get Buster to build her a new one, he's dead. How could .06 ::BUILD :=Jessie: I did. You flirted him out here to build your porch or I'd never even met him .07 ::BUILT :=Jessie: Or that baby bed he built for Ricky. I told him he didn't have .07 ::BUILT :=Jessie: I loved that bridge he built over the creek in back of the house. .07 ::BUILT :=Mama: people move into his houses after he built them. He knew they'd mess them up. .03 ::BULBS :=Jessie: There's extra light bulbs in a box in the hall closet. And we've .08 ::BULBS :=Mama: of you turning off and on like light bulbs some nights. .01 ::BULLETS :=Jessie: I found the bullets. They were in an old milk can. .02 ::BULLETS :=Jessie: if he thought they'd send me some bullets and he said he'd just call for me, .02 ::BULLETS :=Jessie: got through telling me all about the bullets and then he said we ought to talk .02 ::BULLETS :=Mama: Those bullets are at least fifteen years old. .03 ::BUMPY :=Jessie: bus. Riding the bus and it's hot and bumpy and crowded and too noisy and more .05 ::BUNCH :=Mama: do whatever I wanted! I don't want a bunch of pans cluttering up my cabinets I .04 ::BURN :=Jessie: She wouldn't burn her house down now. Where would she .04 ::BURN :=Jessie: a new one, he's dead. How could she burn it up? .05 ::BURN :=Jessie: if you leave carrots on cooking and burn up that pan? .04 ::BURNED :=Mama: I'm serious! Agnes Fletcher's burned down every house she ever lived in. .09 ::BURNING :=Jessie: For the rest of your life. For Agnes burning down one more house or Dawson losing .04 ::BURNS :=Jessie: Three, then. Her whole house burns up? Her clothes and pillows and everything? .03 ::BUS :=Jessie: Mama, I know you used to ride the bus. Riding the bus and it's hot and bumpy .03 ::BUS :=Jessie: you used to ride the bus. Riding the bus and it's hot and bumpy and crowded and .03 ::BUSINESS :=Mama: You didn't have any business being by yourself right then, but .03 ::BUSINESS :=Mama: because without him there wasn't any business, Jessie! .08 ::BUSINESS :=Mama: It was none of their business. .04 ::BUSTER :=Jessie: now. Where would she go? She can't get Buster to build her a new one, he's dead. .08 ::BUSY :=Jessie: I'm busy. .01 ::BUT :=Mama: Yes, I do, but... .01 ::BUT :=Mama: him to take those rubber boots, too, but he said they were for fishing. I told .01 ::BUT :=Mama: they told me I could have them back, but I never did like those shoes. .01 ::BUT :=Mama: of this and be a real fine boy, Jess. But I have to tell you, I wouldn't want Ricky .01 ::BUT :=Mama: we've all felt like shooting somebody, but we don't do it. I just don't think we .02 ::BUT :=Jessie: Dawson got me new slippers, too small, but they go with the robe, he'll say. Be .02 ::BUT :=Jessie: just in case I couldn't find this one, but I'd rather use Daddy's. .02 ::BUT :=Jessie: test your hands for gunpowder, anyway, but you'll pass. .03 ::BUT :=Jessie: But nobody ever checked them. .03 ::BUT :=Jessie: in the top of the broom closet, but if the lights go out, just call Dawson .03 ::BUT :=Jessie: it. Like it better, make it work. But I can stop it. Shut it down, turn it .03 ::BUT :=Jessie: Not a bit. I am worried about you, but I'm going to do what I can before I go. .03 ::BUT :=Jessie: The mousetraps are under the sink, but you call Dawson if you've got one and .03 ::BUT :=Jessie: tray every time you use the dryer. But don't ever put your house shoes in, it'll .03 ::BUT :=Jessie: out, just call Dawson and sit tight. But don't open the refrigerator door. Things .03 ::BUT :=Jessie: all day. I mean, I wonder that myself, but it's my day, so it's mine to wonder about, .03 ::BUT :=Jessie: any reason to think it'll get anything but worse. I'm tired. I'm hurt. I'm sad. .03 ::BUT :=Mama: But I can't do anything about that! .03 ::BUT :=Mama: But I didn't force you, did I? .03 ::BUT :=Mama: I started to, but I didn't. I didn't call him. .03 ::BUT :=Mama: business being by yourself right then, but I can see how you might want a place .04 ::BUT :=Jessie: It takes time, I know, but... .04 ::BUT :=Mama: O.K. Yes, then, but she's crazy. She's as crazy as they come. .04 ::BUT :=Mama: comin'. I'll come up the driveway, but that's as far as I go." .04 ::BUT :=Mama: eats it a lot. Maybe not two meals, but... .04 ::BUT :=Mama: over, and you can understand or not, but I ain't comin'. I'll come up the driveway, .04 ::BUT :=Mama: a girl, Jess, not now. Long time ago. But she's still got it in her, I'm sure of .05 ::BUT :=Jessie: wait it out with him if I wanted to, but you were going to watch Gunsmoke. What .05 ::BUT :=Jessie: know. I liked him better than you did, but I didn't know him any better. .05 ::BUT :=Jessie: thought it was my memory that was bad, but it's not. It's the milk, all right. .05 ::BUT :=Mama: I don't know what I'm here for, but then I don't think about it. But I bet .05 ::BUT :=Mama: his pipe cleaners a couple of times but he always had more somewhere. .05 ::BUT :=Mama: one and then he said, real peaceful, but to the point, "You're right, Thelma. .05 ::BUT :=Mama: for, but then I don't think about it. But I bet you wouldn't be killing yourself .05 ::BUT :=Mama: could practically see the boat myself. But you, you knew what he was thinking about .05 ::BUT :=Mama: he said it, there was something to it, but I never did figure that one out. What .06 ::BUT :=Jessie: They said it was about time, but why didn't I take you with me? And I .07 ::BUT :=Jessie: have to spend so much time on it, but he said it had to last, and the thing .07 ::BUT :=Jessie: if only he would take me with him, but he couldn't and I understood that. I .07 ::BUT :=Jessie: himself another chance, that's all. But I did beg him to take me with him. I .07 ::BUT :=Jessie: of boards would have been just fine, but he used that yellow pine and rubbed it .07 ::BUT :=Jessie: And I tried to stay outside with him, but he always knew I was trying, so it didn't .07 ::BUT :=Jessie: I said I'd always love me, not Cecil. But that's how he felt. .07 ::BUT :=Jessie: does a baby bed have to last, anyway?" But maybe he thought if it was strong enough, .07 ::BUT :=Mama: Maybe he sees things different now, but you're not going to know that till you .08 ::BUT :=Jessie: But I didn't have another one. .08 ::BUT :=Jessie: But you didn't tell anybody. .08 ::BUT :=Jessie: stupid feeling a little before it, but if the TV's on, well, it's easy to m .08 ::BUT :=Jessie: to. I washed this cover for the sofa, but it'll take both of us to get it back .08 ::BUT :=Jessie: where I put them after I washed them, but now I know it means wrap them up, they're .08 ::BUT :=Jessie: Because I've made lists for everything. But now I remember what things mean on my .08 ::BUT :=Mama: I call Dawson. But I get you cleaned up before he gets here .08 ::BUT :=Mama: real good. I had to get a tetanus! But I know what to watch for now. And then .08 ::BUT :=Mama: He said there wasn't anything to do but wait for another one. .08 ::BUT :=Mama: Then it's me for giving them to you, but I didn't do it! .08 ::BUT :=Mama: to have one. Your eyes get this big! But, Jessie, you haven't... .08 ::BUT :=Mama: you to wake up someplace nice, O.K.? But, Jessie, and this is the reason I even .08 ::BUT :=Mama: I know. This is all my fault, Jessie, but I don't know what to do about it now .08 ::BUT :=Mama: put together. I don't know what I did, but I did it, I know. This is all my fault, .09 ::BUT :=Jessie: and reached up and got held and kicked but didn't hurt anybody, and slept whenever .09 ::BUT :=Jessie: myself? I'm sorry about tonight, Mama, but it's exactly why I'm doing it. .09 ::BUT :=Jessie: there are some other things that might work, but might work isn't good enough anymore. .09 ::BUT :=Mama: But something might happen. Something that .09 ::BUT :=Mama: Who knows what it might be, but it might be worth waiting for! Try it .09 ::BUT :=Mama: my time comes. I know it's coming, but... .09 ::BUT :=Mama: I can't think of what you should do, but that doesn't mean there isn't something .10 ::BUT :=Jessie: This letter is for Dawson, but it's mostly about you, so read it if .10 ::BUT :=Jessie: bought it for himself, you know, but then he saw one he liked better and he .10 ::BUT :=Jessie: I'm glad he loves Loretta so much, but I wish he knew not everybody has her .10 ::BUT :=Jessie: I thought you might like to have it, but I didn't think you'd wear it if I gave .10 ::BUT :=Jessie: rug in your bathroom and needlework, but next Christmas, you're really going to .10 ::BUT :=Jessie: them all and have some left for you. But don't let anybody take anything home, .10 ::BUT :=Jessie: won't be able to get in by yourself, but I don't want you trying. Call Dawson, .10 ::BUT :=Jessie: only had good things to say about him, but mainly tell him to find Ricky and tell .10 ::BUT :=Jessie: see people you haven't seen for years, but I thought about what you should say to .05 ::BUTTER :=Jessie: What if you want to make apple butter? You can't make apple butter in that .05 ::BUTTER :=Jessie: apple butter? You can't make apple butter in that little pan. What if you leave .08 ::BUY :=Jessie: heavy black bags. It doesn't pay to buy the cheap ones. And I've got all the .08 ::BUY :=Jessie: whether I was supposed to wash them, buy them, or look for them because I wouldn't .10 ::BUY :=Jessie: not stealing it already. I'd like to buy him a good meal. .10 ::BUY :=Mama: He'll buy dope with it! .03 ::BUYING :=Mama: killing yourself. Something like -- buying us all new dishes! I'd like that. .02 ::BY :=Mama: to act? Tell you to go ahead? O.K. by me, sugar? Might try it myself. What took .03 ::BY :=Jessie: I've never been around people by whole life except when I went to the hospital. .03 ::BY :=Mama: By accident! .03 ::BY :=Mama: Go back to your list. You're hurt by what? .03 ::BY :=Mama: You didn't have any business being by yourself right then, but I can see how .05 ::BY :=Jessie: He didn't mean anything by that, Mama. .09 ::BY :=Jessie: and slept whenever she wanted to, just by closing her eyes. Somebody who mainly .09 ::BY :=Mama: when the time comes. I can't do that by myself, Jessie. I'm not like you, Jessie. .09 ::BY :=Mama: all summer. And Ricky will be married by then and he'll bring your grandbabies .10 ::BY :=Jessie: of all, you won't be able to get in by yourself, but I don't want you trying. .10 ::BY :=Jessie: guess, and ask you what happened, and by that time, the ambulance will be here .10 ::BY :=Mama: I'd rather be by myself, I think. You want me to give people .05 ::CABINETS :=Mama: want a bunch of pans cluttering up my cabinets I can't get down to, anyway. Throw .10 ::CALCULATOR :=Jessie: I want Loretta to have my little calculator. Dawson bought it for himself, .01 ::CALL :=Jessie: should have them. You ought to call the Salvation Army before the whole .01 ::CALL :=Mama: or get a job or one day you'll get a call and he'll say he's sorry for all the .02 ::CALL :=Jessie: If you call him, I'll just have to do it before .02 ::CALL :=Jessie: Then call the funeral home. Then call Loretta and see if she'll do your n .02 ::CALL :=Jessie: call him. Then call the police. Then call the funeral home. Then call Loretta .02 ::CALL :=Jessie: time to help you clean up. Go ahead, call him. Then call the police. Then call .02 ::CALL :=Jessie: me some bullets and he said he'd just call for me, because he knew they'd send .02 ::CALL :=Jessie: you clean up. Go ahead, call him. Then call the police. Then call the funeral home. .02 ::CALL :=Mama: I think we better call the doctor. Or how about the ambulance. .03 ::CALL :=Jessie: If you call the Sweet Tooth before you call the .03 ::CALL :=Jessie: grocery is in Dawson's name when you call. The number's on a whole list of numbers .03 ::CALL :=Jessie: your order the same day, you have to call before ten. And they won't deliver less .03 ::CALL :=Jessie: If you call the Sweet Tooth before you call the grocery, that Susie will take your .03 ::CALL :=Jessie: closet, but if the lights go out, just call Dawson and sit tight. But don't open .03 ::CALL :=Jessie: matter of time, anyway, Mama. When the call comes, you let Dawson handle it. .03 ::CALL :=Jessie: mousetraps are under the sink, but you call Dawson if you've got one and let him .03 ::CALL :=Mama: Or anybody could call us, Jessie. .03 ::CALL :=Mama: I started to, but I didn't. I didn't call him. .03 ::CALL :=Mama: in a garden or go to the store. Let's call a taxi and to the A&P! .04 ::CALL :=Mama: her come over here, Jessie. I could call her up right now and she could bring .06 ::CALL :=Jessie: done that here. Now, I'll just call them out and you say yes or no. I know .06 ::CALL :=Jessie: You know there never was any reason to call the ambulance for me. All they did for .07 ::CALL :=Mama: to know that till you go see him. Or call him up! Right now! He might be home .08 ::CALL :=Jessie: I even put yours on it. So you can call Loretta and remind her. .08 ::CALL :=Mama: I call Dawson. But I get you cleaned up before .08 ::CALL :=Mama: You will not call yourself garbage, Jessie. .08 ::CALL :=Mama: eyes don't even close and people just call them "thinking spells." .10 ::CALL :=Jessie: want you trying. Call Dawson, then call the police, and then call Agnes. And .10 ::CALL :=Jessie: to wake Dawson and Loretta when you call. I want them to still be up and dressed .10 ::CALL :=Jessie: and all. Now, this number's where you call Cecil. I called it last week and he .10 ::CALL :=Jessie: Dawson, then call the police, and then call Agnes. And then you'll need something .10 ::CALL :=Jessie: yourself, but I don't want you trying. Call Dawson, then call the police, and then .10 ::CALL :=Mama: you want me to tell Ricky or who I call to rake the leaves or... .03 ::CALLED :=Jessie: I called this morning and canceled the papers, .10 ::CALLED :=Jessie: this number's where you call Cecil. I called it last week and he answered, so I .02 ::CALLING :=Mama: Well, I'm calling Dawson right now. We'll just see .04 ::CALLING :=Mama: She's calling me from a pay phone this week. God .03 ::CALLS :=Jessie: He just calls me Jess like he knows who he's talking .03 ::CALLS :=Mama: Honey, nothing says those calls are always going to be some new trouble .03 ::CALLS :=Mama: could come over, you know. What if he calls us? .10 ::CALLS :=Mama: I'll make my calls and then I'll just sit. I won't need .10 ::CALLS :=Mama: me where she gets that Irish yarn, she calls it. I know it doesn't come from Ireland. .10 ::CALLS :=Mama: tell me what to tell Dr. Davis when he calls or how much you want me to tell Ricky .04 ::CAME :=Jessie: afraid I might have another one if she came over, or what? .05 ::CAME :=Jessie: said to you the night he died. You came storming out of his room and said I .09 ::CAME :=Jessie: there. Somebody I waited for who never came. And never will. So, see, it doesn't .10 ::CAME :=Jessie: other night of our lives, and then I came over and kissed you and said, "'Night, .01 ::CAN :=Jessie: They can go in the freezer till you're ready for .01 ::CAN :=Jessie: the bullets. They were in an old milk can. .01 ::CAN :=Mama: Well, you can have it if you want. When I die, you'll .01 ::CAN :=Mama: got you to bring down that milk can. Agnes Fletcher sold hers to somebody .02 ::CAN :=Jessie: I think I can kill myself, Mama. .02 ::CAN :=Jessie: See? Everybody's doing what they can. .02 ::CAN :=Jessie: I don't know it's quiet. So nobody can get me. .02 ::CAN :=Jessie: On the phone with Agnes. About the milk can, I guess. Anyway, I asked Dawson if he .03 ::CAN :=Jessie: No. Can you order your medicine or do you want .03 ::CAN :=Jessie: I stay as long as I can. Besides, it's you they come to see. .03 ::CAN :=Jessie: from where you're going? Well, I can get off right now if I want to, because .03 ::CAN :=Jessie: Like it better, make it work. But I can stop it. Shut it down, turn it off like .03 ::CAN :=Jessie: about you, but I'm going to do what I can before I go. We're not just going to .03 ::CAN :=Jessie: down to it. Whenever I feel like it, I can get off. As soon as I've had enough, .03 ::CAN :=Mama: I think we can leave the Chinese out of this. .03 ::CAN :=Mama: You do too much for me. I can fill pill bottles all day, Jessie, and .03 ::CAN :=Mama: this because of the newspapers, I can sure fix that! .03 ::CAN :=Mama: If your gums are swelling again, we can get you to the dentist in the mornin .03 ::CAN :=Mama: being by yourself right then, but I can see how you might want a place of your .03 ::CAN :=Mama: you pay somebody else to do, if you can. .03 ::CAN :=Mama: have to come over here again. Dawson can just leave her at home when he comes. .03 ::CAN :=Mama: If you're mad about doing the wash, we can get Loretta to do it. .04 ::CAN :=Mama: so I ain't comin' over, and you can understand or not, but I ain't comin'. .04 ::CAN :=Mama: Of course not. I mean -- Of course you can have a caramel apple. .05 ::CAN :=Mama: me about Agnes. You think you can rest easy if you get me a new babysitter? .05 ::CAN :=Mama: Not enough, though, does it? You can still taste it, can't you? .05 ::CAN :=Mama: one fork, one big spoon, and the can opener, and put them out where I can .05 ::CAN :=Mama: and cups. I'll use paper. Loretta can have what she wants and Dawson can sell .05 ::CAN :=Mama: can have what she wants and Dawson can sell the rest. .05 ::CAN :=Mama: can opener, and put them out where I can get them. .06 ::CAN :=Jessie: ketchup from the bottle or what? How can you want your food and not want your .07 ::CAN :=Mama: life. Things happen. You do what you can about them and you see what happens next. .08 ::CAN :=Jessie: is to kill myself? What if it is? I can still do it! .08 ::CAN :=Jessie: you. I even put yours on it. So you can call Loretta and remind her. .08 ::CAN :=Jessie: have you here? What if the only way I can get away from you for good is to kill .08 ::CAN :=Jessie: is Tuesday. Put it out as late as you can. The Davis's dogs get in it if you don't. .08 ::CAN :=Mama: I can tell when you're about to have one. Your .08 ::CAN :=Mama: Of course you do! You can even scream at me, if you want to. I .08 ::CAN :=Mama: in a light socket as fast as you can... .08 ::CAN :=Mama: even scream at me, if you want to. I can take it. You don't have to act like you're .08 ::CAN :=Mama: know. You don't know what happens? How can you not know what happens? .09 ::CAN :=Jessie: You can because you have to. It's what you've .09 ::CAN :=Jessie: Sure you can. You just did. Say it again. .09 ::CAN :=Mama: How can I let you go? .09 ::CAN :=Mama: Jessie, how can I live here without you? I need you! .09 ::CAN :=Mama: You find it. You think of it. You can keep trying. You can get brave and try .09 ::CAN :=Mama: I don't want you to go, Jessie. How can I -- How can I get up every day knowing .09 ::CAN :=Mama: bring your grandbabies over and you can sneak them a piece of candy when their .09 ::CAN :=Mama: you to go, Jessie. How can I -- How can I get up every day knowing you had to .09 ::CAN :=Mama: Jessie. And as soon as I'm dead, you can do whatever you want. Maybe with me gone, .09 ::CAN :=Mama: dare you! How dare you! You think you can just leave whenever you want, like you're .09 ::CAN :=Mama: stay alive, and I couldn't do it. How can I live with myself after th is, Jess .09 ::CAN :=Mama: think of it. You can keep trying. You can get brave and try some more . You don't .09 ::CAN :=Mama: he'll change the subject as fast as he can. He'll talk about how much he has to .10 ::CAN :=Jessie: to still be up and dressed so they can get right over. .10 ::CAN :=Mama: I can too! I'll stand in front of this hall .10 ::CAN :=Mama: Maybe if Connie Richards does come, I can get her to tell me where she gets that .10 ::CAN :=Mama: if I feel like it and the only way you can make sure I do what you want is you come .01 ::CAN'T :=Mama: from there before you have a fit. I can't come up and get you, you know. .02 ::CAN'T :=Mama: You can't use my towels! They're my towels. I've .02 ::CAN'T :=Mama: And you can't use your father's gun, either. It's .02 ::CAN'T :=Mama: No. You can't do it. I won't let you. The house is .02 ::CAN'T :=Mama: clock and you can't wake up so you can't shut it off. Ever. .02 ::CAN'T :=Mama: either. It's mine now, too. And you can't do it in my house. .02 ::CAN'T :=Mama: if it's like an alarm clock and you can't wake up so you can't shut it off. .03 ::CAN'T :=Jessie: I can't do any of that nice work, Mama. .03 ::CAN'T :=Jessie: I can't say it any better. .03 ::CAN'T :=Jessie: No. You can't. And I can't do anything either, about .03 ::CAN'T :=Jessie: No. You can't. And I can't do anything either, about my life, .03 ::CAN'T :=Jessie: You know I couldn't work. I can't do anything. I've never been around .03 ::CAN'T :=Mama: But I can't do anything about that! .04 ::CAN'T :=Jessie: We can't go on fussing all night. I mean, I .04 ::CAN'T :=Jessie: Does that mean I can't have a caramel apple? .04 ::CAN'T :=Jessie: down now. Where would she go? She can't get Buster to build her a new one, .04 ::CAN'T :=Mama: shook the hand of death and I can't take the chance it's catching, Thelma, .04 ::CAN'T :=Mama: It's all that okra she eats. You can't just willy-nilly eat okra two meals .05 ::CAN'T :=Jessie: if you want to make apple butter? You can't make apple butter in that little pan. .05 ::CAN'T :=Mama: does it? You can still taste it, can't you? .05 ::CAN'T :=Mama: of pans cluttering up my cabinets I can't get down to, anyway. Throw them out. .07 ::CAN'T :=Jessie: Cecil. I said "I'm sorry, Jessie, I can't fix it all for you." I said I'd always .08 ::CAN'T :=Mama: sucking air in and out like you can't breathe. .08 ::CAN'T :=Mama: you do has to do with me, Jessie. You can't do anything, wash your face or cut .09 ::CAN'T :=Mama: Jessie. I can't just sit here and say O.K., kill yourself .09 ::CAN'T :=Mama: Look, maybe I can't think of what you should do, but that .09 ::CAN'T :=Mama: watching television here? No, you can't, Jessie. You make me feel like a fool .09 ::CAN'T :=Mama: to help me die when the time comes. I can't do that by myself, Jessie. I'm not .09 ::CAN'T :=Mama: you? I'm looking right through you! I can't stop you because you're already gone! .10 ::CAN'T :=Jessie: I can't. It's too late. .10 ::CAN'T :=Jessie: Don't try and stop me, Mama, you can't do it. .10 ::CAN'T :=Mama: I can't. You can't go. You can't do this. You .10 ::CAN'T :=Mama: I can't. You can't go. You can't do this. You didn't say .10 ::CAN'T :=Mama: I can't. You can't go. You can't do this. You didn't say it would be .10 ::CAN'T :=Mama: stand in front of this hall and you can't get past me. You'll have to knock me .03 ::CANCELED :=Jessie: I called this morning and canceled the papers, except for Sunday, for .03 ::CANDLES :=Jessie: of fuses in the fuse box. There's candles and matches in the top of the broom .05 ::CANDY :=Mama: cook. I never liked it, anyway. I like candy. Wrapped in plastic or coming in sacks. .09 ::CANDY :=Mama: over and you can sneak them a piece of candy when their daddy's not looking and .10 ::CANDY :=Jessie: tell them what we did. I filled up the candy jars. I cleaned out the refrigerator. .05 ::CAR :=Mama: drive out to the lake and sit in his car. Dawson told me. And Bennie at the bait .09 ::CAR :=Mama: how much he has to pay to park his car these days. .03 ::CARAMEL :=Jessie: Nothing. Want a caramel? .04 ::CARAMEL :=Jessie: Does that mean I can't have a caramel apple? .04 ::CARAMEL :=Jessie: cocoa, Mama. And I'd like to have a caramel apple and do your nails. .04 ::CARAMEL :=Mama: I make the best caramel apples in the world. .04 ::CARAMEL :=Mama: I mean -- Of course you can have a caramel apple. .04 ::CARAMEL :=Mama: pan and stir it up. All right. Fine. Caramel apples. Cocoa. O.K. .03 ::CARD :=Jessie: The washer repair number is on a little card taped to the side of the machine. .03 ::CARE :=Mama: Something for you to take care of. .03 ::CARE :=Mama: don't want to. You don't have to take care of me, Jessie. .08 ::CARE :=Jessie: said it yourself, the medicine takes care of the fits. .10 ::CARE :=Jessie: you hear the doorbell ring and I don't care if it's an hour, you keep washing that .10 ::CARE :=Mama: yet. We've got a lot of things to take care of here. I don't know where my prescriptions .01 ::CAREFUL :=Jessie: I'm careful. .08 ::CARELESS :=Mama: lot. That's what he thought. You were careless. Or maybe he thought I beat you. .06 ::CARLENE :=Mama: She was Agnes's girl, Carlene. Judge for yourself. .06 ::CARPENTER :=Mama: He's the best carpenter I ever saw. That little house of .05 ::CARROTS :=Jessie: in that little pan. What if you leave carrots on cooking and burn up that pan? .05 ::CARROTS :=Mama: I don't like carrots. .08 ::CARRYING :=Mama: much or didn't eat right when I was carrying you. It has to be something I d .01 ::CASE :=Jessie: coming tomorrow. I ordered you a whole case. .01 ::CASE :=Mama: A whole case will go stale, Jessie. .02 ::CASE :=Jessie: Cecil's all ready in there, just in case I couldn't find this one, but I'd rather .04 ::CATCHING :=Mama: death and I can't take the chance it's catching, Thelma, so I ain't comin' over, .08 ::CATTLE :=Mama: I'm standing there poking you with a cattle prod or you're sticking your finger .08 ::CAUGHT :=Mama: I never let you out of my sight. I caught you every time. .01 ::CAUSED :=Mama: he's sorry for all the trouble he's caused and invite you out for supper someplace .03 ::CECIL :=Mama: house or found another place when Cecil left you, you'd have made some new .03 ::CECIL :=Mama: to talk about it again. Is it Ricky or Cecil or your fits or your hair falling out .06 ::CECIL :=Jessie: in an old Milk of Magnesia box. Cecil left me because he made me choose between .06 ::CECIL :=Jessie: because I didn't know how to hold on. Cecil left for pretty much the same reas .06 ::CECIL :=Mama: fall off the horse, really? Why did Cecil leave you? Where did you put my old .07 ::CECIL :=Jessie: Yes I do and so did Cecil. Ricky is the two of us together for .07 ::CECIL :=Jessie: And say what? Nothing's changed. Cecil, I'd just like to look at you, if you .07 ::CECIL :=Jessie: note I showed you. I wrote it. Not Cecil. I said "I'm sorry, Jessie, I can't .07 ::CECIL :=Jessie: you." I said I'd always love me, not Cecil. But that's how he felt. .07 ::CECIL :=Jessie: He wasn't the wrong man, Mama. I loved Cecil so much. And I tried to get more exercise .07 ::CECIL :=Mama: Stop that! Jessie, Cecil might be ready to try it again, honey, .07 ::CECIL :=Mama: Ricky is too much like Cecil. .08 ::CECIL :=Jessie: and it wasn't till I had the fit when Cecil was looking that anybody bothered to .08 ::CECIL :=Jessie: was trying to say it's all right that Cecil left. It was -- a relief in a way. .09 ::CECIL :=Jessie: Red Chinese and epilepsy and Ricky and Cecil and you. And me. And hope. I say no! .10 ::CECIL :=Jessie: all. Now, this number's where you call Cecil. I called it last week and he answered, .10 ::CECIL :=Mama: things you told me to do! I'll tell Cecil what a miserable man he was to make .02 ::CECIL'S :=Jessie: Seems O.K. I had Cecil's all ready in there, just in case .05 ::CHAIN :=Jessie: a sick cow all night and leave me a chain of sleepy stick elephants on my bed .01 ::CHAIR :=Jessie: or a foam cushion out of a yard chair would be real good. .05 ::CHAIR :=Jessie: sitting. Big old faded blue man in the chair. Quiet. .05 ::CHAIR :=Mama: FISHING sign around his neck in that chair. I saw him stare off at the water. .08 ::CHAIR :=Mama: had fits, too. I think he sat in his chair and had little fits. I read this a .04 ::CHAIRS :=Mama: set 'em. One time she set out porch chairs and served lemonade. .03 ::CHANCE :=Jessie: and they learned it before you had a chance to say whether you wanted them to .04 ::CHANCE :=Mama: the hand of death and I can't take the chance it's catching, Thelma, so I ain't .05 ::CHANCE :=Mama: born and he said you didn't have a chance. .05 ::CHANCE :=Mama: He didn't say a thing. It was his last chance not to talk to me and he took full .07 ::CHANCE :=Jessie: right thing. He gave himself another chance, that's all. But I did beg him to .09 ::CHANCE :=Mama: even saw it. And then you gave me this chance to make it better, convince you to .03 ::CHANGE :=Jessie: do anything either, about my life, to change it, make it better, make me feel better .03 ::CHANGE :=Mama: fill pill bottles all day, Jessie, and change the shelf paper and wash the floor .04 ::CHANGE :=Mama: she feels like -- Well, we all like a change of scene, don't we? .05 ::CHANGE :=Jessie: interested in things. Breathe better. Change somehow. .05 ::CHANGE :=Mama: What if he did? It didn't change anything. .05 ::CHANGE :=Mama: rest of my life like I was supposed to change and surprise him somehow. Like I remember .09 ::CHANGE :=Jessie: There wasn't anything you could say to change my mind. I didn't want you to save .09 ::CHANGE :=Mama: might happen. Something that could change everything. Who knows what it might .09 ::CHANGE :=Mama: somebody asks Dawson about it, he'll change the subject as fast as he can. He'll .07 ::CHANGED :=Jessie: And say what? Nothing's changed. Cecil, I'd just like to look at .08 ::CHANGED :=Mama: wasn't all the time, Jessie. And they changed when you started to school. More .03 ::CHEAP :=Mama: and keep him in the house. Dogs are cheap! .08 ::CHEAP :=Jessie: black bags. It doesn't pay to buy the cheap ones. And I've got all the ties here .05 ::CHEAPER :=Jessie: couldn't just live here together. Be cheaper for both of you and somebody to talk .03 ::CHECKED :=Jessie: But nobody ever checked them. .03 ::CHECKED :=Mama: When he died, they checked them. .08 ::CHEST :=Mama: Well, your chest squeezes in and out, and you sound .09 ::CHEWED :=Jessie: colors waving around over her head and chewed on a polka-dot whale and woke up knowing .05 ::CHEWING :=Mama: Never once. His tackle box was full of chewing tobacco and all he ever did was drive .03 ::CHEWY :=Jessie: They saw the little rosebuds on it. Chewy mint? .05 ::CHICKENS :=Mama: was -- a whole pipe-cleaner family -- chickens, pigs, a dog with a bad leg -- it .05 ::CHILD :=Mama: You don't get off as easy as that, child. .09 ::CHILD :=Jessie: I am what became of your child. I found an old baby picture of me. .09 ::CHILD :=Mama: You are my child! .09 ::CHILD :=Mama: me feel like a fool for being alive, child, and you are so wrong! I like it here, .10 ::CHILD :=Mama: alone? Jessie! Please! Jessie, Jessie, child -- Forgive me. I thought you were .08 ::CHILDREN :=Mama: father. Because I didn't want any more children. Because I smoked too much or didn't .10 ::CHILDREN :=Jessie: doing for Thanksgiving or how their children... .10 ::CHILDREN :=Mama: I don't think I should ask about their children. I'll talk about what they have .03 ::CHINA :=Jessie: Oh, everything from you and me to Red China. .02 ::CHINABERRY :=Jessie: nails, though. Want to try that new Chinaberry color? .03 ::CHINESE :=Mama: I think we can leave the Chinese out of this. .09 ::CHINESE :=Jessie: no. To Dawson and Loretta and the Red Chinese and epilepsy and Ricky and Cecil .01 ::CHIPPED :=Mama: night it is, have you? They're all chipped, see? I've been waiting all week, .04 ::CHOCOLATE :=Jessie: to know and you could make me some hot chocolate. The old way. .05 ::CHOCOLATE :=Mama: It's a real waste of chocolate. You don't have to finish it. .06 ::CHOCOLATE :=Mama: Not anymore, I'm not. That hot chocolate was the last. Hooray. .10 ::CHOCOLATE :=Jessie: somebody gets here, so wash the hot chocolate pan. You wash that pan till you .10 ::CHOCOLATE :=Jessie: out the refrigerator. We made some hot chocolate and put the cover back on the sofa. .06 ::CHOOSE :=Jessie: box. Cecil left me because he made me choose between him and smoking. .03 ::CHRISTMAS :=Jessie: on, ten years. On all the time, since Christmas. .03 ::CHRISTMAS :=Mama: So why Christmas? .03 ::CHRISTMAS :=Mama: What happened at Christmas? .09 ::CHRISTMAS :=Jessie: it's not so strange. Anyway, after Christmas, after I decided to do this, I .09 ::CHRISTMAS :=Mama: confuse them. Oh yes, ever since Christmas you've been laughing to yourself .10 ::CHRISTMAS :=Jessie: just don't read that page. This Christmas, you're getting mostly stuff for .10 ::CHRISTMAS :=Jessie: you're really going to cost him next Christmas. I think you'll like it a lot and .10 ::CHRISTMAS :=Jessie: your bathroom and needlework, but next Christmas, you're really going to cost him .10 ::CHRISTMASES :=Jessie: for you for at least twenty more Christmases and birthdays, so if you want .01 ::CHURN :=Jessie: wheel up there, too. There's even a churn. I'll get it all if you want. .03 ::CIGARETTES :=Jessie: what we need and tell them to add on cigarettes until it gets to fifteen doll .08 ::CLAM :=Mama: fried clams. I know you love that clam roll. .08 ::CLAMS :=Mama: Howard Johnson's and have those fried clams. I know you love that clam roll. .01 ::CLEAN :=Jessie: The barrel has to be clean, Mama. Old powder, dust gets in it .02 ::CLEAN :=Jessie: will get here just in time to help you clean up. Go ahead, call him. Then call the .03 ::CLEAN :=Jessie: Sure he does. Be sure you clean out the lint tray every time you use .08 ::CLEANED :=Mama: I call Dawson. But I get you cleaned up before he gets here and I make .10 ::CLEANED :=Jessie: which ones. Oh, and I had your dress cleaned that you wore to Daddy's. You looked .10 ::CLEANED :=Jessie: we did. I filled up the candy jars. I cleaned out the refrigerator. We made some .05 ::CLEANERS :=Jessie: Or make me a boyfriend out of pipe cleaners and sit back and smile like the .05 ::CLEANERS :=Mama: to look at them and I hid his pipe cleaners a couple of times but he always .05 ::CLERK :=Mama: Into what? The Queen? A clerk in a shoe store? Why should I? Because .01 ::CLIMB :=Jessie: He's just too lazy to climb up there, Mama. Or maybe he's just .02 ::CLOCK :=Mama: at all. What if it's like an alarm clock and you can't wake up so you can't .02 ::CLOSE :=Mama: So is the back yard, Jessie! Close your eyes. Stuff cotton in your ears. .08 ::CLOSE :=Mama: where maybe their eyes don't even close and people just call them "thinking .10 ::CLOSE :=Jessie: "'Night, Mother," and you heard me close my bedroom door and the next thing .03 ::CLOSET :=Jessie: and matches in the top of the broom closet, but if the lights go out, just call .03 ::CLOSET :=Jessie: extra light bulbs in a box in the hall closet. And we've got a couple of packages .10 ::CLOSET :=Jessie: slippers are in a sack for her in my closet. Tell her I know they'll fit and I've .09 ::CLOSING :=Jessie: slept whenever she wanted to, just by closing her eyes. Somebody who mainly just .01 ::CLOTHES :=Jessie: Dawson could probably use some of those clothes up there. Somebody should have them. .03 ::CLOTHES :=Mama: know how the washer works. You put the clothes in. You put the soap in. You turn .04 ::CLOTHES :=Jessie: then. Her whole house burns up? Her clothes and pillows and everything? I'm not .05 ::CLOTHES :=Mama: for people to go around without any clothes on, they'd have been born that w .08 ::CLOTHES :=Jessie: one, except I wake up with different clothes on, feeling like I've been run over. .05 ::CLUTTERING :=Mama: I wanted! I don't want a bunch of pans cluttering up my cabinets I can't get down .04 ::COATS :=Mama: I hate milk. Coats your throat as bad as okra. Something .02 ::COCK :=Mama: said about getting excited. You'll cock the pistol and have a fit. .04 ::COCOA :=Jessie: I bought cocoa, Mama. And I'd like to have a caramel .04 ::COCOA :=Mama: It takes cocoa, Jessie. .04 ::COCOA :=Mama: Or used to. And you don't get cocoa like mine anywhere anymore. .04 ::COCOA :=Mama: a good idea. We should've had more cocoa. Cocoa is perfect. .04 ::COCOA :=Mama: idea. We should've had more cocoa. Cocoa is perfect. .04 ::COCOA :=Mama: up. All right. Fine. Caramel apples. Cocoa. O.K. .05 ::COCOA :=Jessie: The cocoa helps. .05 ::COCOA :=Jessie: get them, like you got the one for the cocoa. And if somebody else comes over here .06 ::COCOA :=Mama: apple, either. It'll be just like the cocoa. You never like eating at all, did .01 ::COCONUT :=Mama: the coconut falls off. Why does the coconut fall off? .01 ::COCONUT :=Mama: You hear me, honey? I hate it when the coconut falls off. Why does the coconut fall .02 ::COFFEE :=Jessie: me over it, that's all. Want some coffee? .03 ::COFFEE :=Mama: hair falling out or you drink too much coffee or you never go out of the house or .06 ::COFFEE :=Jessie: around the place, come in and get some coffee and talk to you. God knows what you .09 ::COFFEE :=Mama: supposed to be out there making the coffee and watching me get older every day, .06 ::COKES :=Jessie: you said. I told them you'd run out of Cokes and you'd have to drink it. I told .02 ::COLD :=Jessie: I'm not, Mama. I'm cold all the time, anyway. .04 ::COLD :=Mama: Your hands are cold. .06 ::COLD :=Mama: down from a stretcher passed out cold? .02 ::COLOR :=Jessie: Want to try that new Chinaberry color? .09 ::COLORS :=Jessie: just laid there and laughed at the colors waving around over her head and chewed .01 ::COME :=Mama: You come down from there before you have a fit. .01 ::COME :=Mama: in my life. This is way too far to come for what's out here to steal. Never .01 ::COME :=Mama: just hand it over to them when they come, how's that? Whatever they want, the .01 ::COME :=Mama: there before you have a fit. I can't come up and get you, you know. .02 ::COME :=Jessie: Oh, come on. .02 ::COME :=Mama: deranged, and you're as normal as they come, Jessie, for the most part. We're all .03 ::COME :=Jessie: long as I can. Besides, it's you they come to see. .03 ::COME :=Jessie: next door to the grocery and it'll all come out together. Be sure you talk to Susie, .03 ::COME :=Mama: Ricky could come over, you know. What if he calls us .03 ::COME :=Mama: Good time don't come looking for you, Jessie. You could work .03 ::COME :=Mama: Loretta doesn't ever have to come over here again. Dawson can just leave .03 ::COME :=Mama: You leave the room when they come over, anyway. .03 ::COME :=Mama: around you. Give Ricky a place to come see you. You never should've come h .03 ::COME :=Mama: because I stay in the room when they come. .03 ::COME :=Mama: to come see you. You never should've come here. .04 ::COME :=Jessie: Why won't she come over here? .04 ::COME :=Jessie: much okra she eats and why she won't come over here. If I have to keep dragging .04 ::COME :=Jessie: it. When I'm in the hospital, does she come over here? .04 ::COME :=Mama: I could make her come over here, Jessie. I could call her .04 ::COME :=Mama: or not, but I ain't comin'. I'll come up the driveway, but that's as far as .04 ::COME :=Mama: her she just has to come and she'll come, all right. She owes me one. .04 ::COME :=Mama: she's crazy. She's as crazy as they come. She's a lunatic. .04 ::COME :=Mama: at all. I'll tell her she just has to come and she'll come, all right. She owes .04 ::COME :=Mama: now and she could bring the birds and come visit. I didn't know you ever thought .05 ::COME :=Jessie: Come visit. .05 ::COME :=Jessie: He didn't mean to. I didn't have to come here. We've been through this. .05 ::COME :=Mama: Who's going to come cook here? .05 ::COME :=Mama: They all laughed about it. And he'd come back from fishing and all he'd have .06 ::COME :=Jessie: he'd help you out around the place, come in and get some coffee and talk to you. .10 ::COME :=Jessie: Maybe Agnes could come stay with you for a few days. .10 ::COME :=Jessie: for him, out here, from me, and to come get it. .10 ::COME :=Jessie: over that nervous part when the first come in. .10 ::COME :=Jessie: the ambulance will be here and they'll come in and get me and you know how that .10 ::COME :=Jessie: you hear the shot, I don't want you to come in. First of all, you won't be able .10 ::COME :=Mama: Come in. .10 ::COME :=Mama: Maybe if Connie Richards does come, I can get her to tell me where she .10 ::COME :=Mama: make sure I do what you want is you come out here and make me, Jessie! Jessie! .10 ::COME :=Mama: yarn, she calls it. I know it doesn't come from Ireland. I think it just comes .02 ::COMES :=Jessie: over here. Just you and me. If Dawson comes over, it'll make me feel stupid for .03 ::COMES :=Jessie: of time, anyway, Mama. When the call comes, you let Dawson handle it. .03 ::COMES :=Mama: can just leave her at home when he comes. And we don't ever have to see Dawson .04 ::COMES :=Mama: kitchen is just a tiny thing. When she comes over here, she feels like -- Well, .05 ::COMES :=Jessie: for the cocoa. And if somebody else comes over here to cook, they'll have something .05 ::COMES :=Mama: he told it? I'm sitting in the mud, he comes along, drags me in the kitchen, "She's .06 ::COMES :=Jessie: Now, you know the milkman comes on Wednesdays and Saturdays, and he .09 ::COMES :=Mama: of it, for me, I mean. When my time comes. I know it's coming, but... .09 ::COMES :=Mama: supposed to help me die when the time comes. I can't do that by myself, Jessie. .10 ::COMES :=Mama: come from Ireland. I think it just comes with a green wrapper. .04 ::COMIN' :=Mama: it's catching, Thelma, so I ain't comin' over, and you can understand or not, .04 ::COMIN' :=Mama: you can understand or not, but I ain't comin'. I'll come up the driveway, but that's .01 ::COMING :=Jessie: There's more coming tomorrow. I ordered you a whole c .02 ::COMING :=Mama: Your birthday's coming up, Jessie. Don't you want to know .05 ::COMING :=Mama: I like candy. Wrapped in plastic or coming in sacks. And tuna. I like tuna. I'll .08 ::COMING :=Mama: they are now! Loretta's birthday isn't coming up, is it? .09 ::COMING :=Mama: like and I don't know how he sounds coming up behind me like that or if it will .09 ::COMING :=Mama: mean. When my time comes. I know it's coming, but... .10 ::COMING :=Jessie: you just say, "I appreciate your coming, Connie." And then ask how their garden .10 ::COMING :=Jessie: be so bad once your friends start coming to the funeral home. You'll probably .09 ::COMPANY :=Jessie: enough because I'm not -- very good company. Am I. .09 ::COMPANY :=Jessie: no reason to stay, except to keep you company, and that's -- not reason enough .02 ::COMPLIMENT :=Jessie: He took it as a compliment. He thought I might be taking .09 ::CONFUSE :=Mama: I guess you think this will really confuse them. Oh yes, ever since Christmas .10 ::CONNIE :=Jessie: just say, "I appreciate your coming, Connie." And then ask how their garden was .10 ::CONNIE :=Mama: Maybe if Connie Richards does come, I can get her .05 ::CONVERSATIONS :=Mama: Jessie! You had those quiet little conversations after supper every night. What .09 ::CONVINCE :=Mama: gave me this chance to make it better, convince you to stay alive, and I couldn't .05 ::COOK :=Jessie: to cook, they'll have something to cook in, and that's the end of it! .05 ::COOK :=Jessie: if somebody else comes over here to cook, they'll have something to cook in, .05 ::COOK :=Mama: I'm not going to cook. I never liked it, anyway. I like candy. .05 ::COOK :=Mama: Who's going to come cook here? .06 ::COOK :=Jessie: your food and not want your pots to cook it in? This stuff will all spoil in .05 ::COOKING :=Jessie: pan. What if you leave carrots on cooking and burn up that pan? .03 ::COOL :=Jessie: refrigerator door. Things will stay cool in there as long as you keep the door .03 ::CORDS :=Jessie: there's no better place for. Extension cords, batteries for the radio, extra lighters, .05 ::CORN :=Jessie: know, Mama! His life, I guess. His corn. His boots. Us. Things. You know. .09 ::CORNFLAKES :=Jessie: maybe if I really like rice pudding or cornflakes for breakfast or something, that .04 ::CORPSE :=Mama: "Like a corpse," she says, "and I'm gonna be one .10 ::COST :=Jessie: next Christmas, you're really going to cost him next Christmas. I think you'll like .02 ::COTTON :=Mama: yard, Jessie! Close your eyes. Stuff cotton in your ears. Take a nap! It's quiet .01 ::COULD :=Jessie: Dawson could probably use some of those clothes .01 ::COULD :=Mama: hospital. When he died, they told me I could have them back, but I never did like .02 ::COULD :=Mama: How could he do that? .03 ::COULD :=Jessie: If I thought I could do that, I would stay. .03 ::COULD :=Jessie: except when I went to the hospital. I could have a seizure any time. What good .03 ::COULD :=Jessie: good would a job do? The kind of job I could get would make me feel worse. .03 ::COULD :=Mama: I could find it. .03 ::COULD :=Mama: We could get a new dog and keep him in the house. .03 ::COULD :=Mama: You could get a job! .03 ::COULD :=Mama: You could keep books. You kept your dad's bo .03 ::COULD :=Mama: Ricky could come over, you know. What if he calls .03 ::COULD :=Mama: Or anybody could call us, Jessie. .03 ::COULD :=Mama: come looking for you, Jessie. You could work some puzzles or put in a garden .03 ::COULD :=Mama: to be some new trouble he's into. You could get one that he's got a job, that he's .04 ::COULD :=Jessie: That you could ever tell, you mean. You didn't have .04 ::COULD :=Jessie: I thought I could. .04 ::COULD :=Jessie: Why they stay with her when they could be outside with the other birds. What .04 ::COULD :=Jessie: go on fussing all night. I mean, I could ask you things I always wanted to know .04 ::COULD :=Jessie: things I always wanted to know and you could make me some hot chocolate. The old .04 ::COULD :=Jessie: to build her a new one, he's dead. How could she burn it up? .04 ::COULD :=Mama: I could make her come over here, Jessie. I .04 ::COULD :=Mama: make her come over here, Jessie. I could call her up right now and she could .04 ::COULD :=Mama: just not that much to things that I could ever see. .04 ::COULD :=Mama: anyway, so why wait for it, is all I could ever make out about it. Agnes like .04 ::COULD :=Mama: I could call her up right now and she could bring the birds and come visit. I didn't .05 ::COULD :=Jessie: is out getting her hair done, you could take them all for a walk! .05 ::COULD :=Jessie: storming out of his room and said I could wait it out with him if I wanted to, .05 ::COULD :=Mama: How could I love him, Jessie. I didn't have a .05 ::COULD :=Mama: the weather rolling in. I got where I could practically see the boat myself. But .06 ::COULD :=Jessie: riding that day. It was his idea I could do anything if I just made up my mind .06 ::COULD :=Mama: Well, how could I? You're real far back there, Jes .08 ::COULD :=Jessie: Could be. .08 ::COULD :=Jessie: You could just leave me on the floor. .08 ::COULD :=Jessie: Mama. Once I started remembering, I could see what it all added up to. .08 ::COULD :=Jessie: have and you're not enough? What if I could take all the rest of it if only I didn't .09 ::COULD :=Jessie: I only told you so I could explain it, so you wouldn't blame yourself, .09 ::COULD :=Jessie: I do winds up like th is. How could I think you would understand? How could .09 ::COULD :=Jessie: I think you would understand? How could I think you would want a manicure? .09 ::COULD :=Jessie: hold hands for an hour and then I could go shoot myself? I'm sorry about tonight, .09 ::COULD :=Jessie: feel bad. There wasn't anything you could say to change my mind. I didn't want .09 ::COULD :=Jessie: I think you would want a manicure? We could hold hands for an hour and then I could .09 ::COULD :=Mama: for! Try it for two more weeks. We could have more talks like tonight . .09 ::COULD :=Mama: something might happen. Something that could change everything. Who knows what it .10 ::COULD :=Jessie: Maybe Agnes could come stay with you for a few days. .10 ::COULD :=Mama: I was here with you all the time. How could I know you were so alone? Jessie! Please! .05 ::COULD'VE :=Mama: than I got from the two of you. He could've had that GONE FISHING sign around .06 ::COULD'VE :=Jessie: emergency room was let me wake up. I could've done that here. Now, I'll just call .01 ::COULDN'T :=Jessie: the attic? I looked your whole nap and couldn't find it anywhere. .02 ::COULDN'T :=Jessie: all ready in there, just in case I couldn't find this one, but I'd rather use .03 ::COULDN'T :=Jessie: You know I couldn't work. I can't do anything. I've .05 ::COULDN'T :=Jessie: There's no reason why the two of you couldn't just live here together. Be cheaper .06 ::COULDN'T :=Jessie: And I couldn't get one on my own, of course. .07 ::COULDN'T :=Jessie: up weighing two hundred pounds and I couldn't move it. I said, "How long does .07 ::COULDN'T :=Jessie: only he would take me with him, but he couldn't and I understood that. I wrote that .08 ::COULDN'T :=Mama: Your memory's always been good. When couldn't you remember things? You're always .09 ::COULDN'T :=Mama: convince you to stay alive, and I couldn't do it. How can I live with myself .10 ::COULDN'T :=Jessie: then he saw one he liked better and he couldn't bring both of them home with Loretta .10 ::COUNTING :=Jessie: bring both of them home with Loretta counting every penny the way she does, so .05 ::COUNTRY :=Mama: He felt sorry for me. He wanted a plain country woman and that's what he married, .01 ::COUPLE :=Jessie: Shoot myself. In a couple of hours. .03 ::COUPLE :=Jessie: in the hall closet. And we've got a couple of packages of fuses in the fuse box. .05 ::COUPLE :=Mama: at them and I hid his pipe cleaners a couple of times but he always had more s .07 ::COUPLE :=Jessie: didn't have to be anything special, a couple of boards would have been just fine, .04 ::COURSE :=Mama: Of course not. I mean -- Of course you can have .04 ::COURSE :=Mama: Of course not. I mean -- Of course you can have a caramel apple. .06 ::COURSE :=Jessie: And I couldn't get one on my own, of course. .08 ::COURSE :=Mama: Of course you do! You can even scream at me, .03 ::COVER :=Jessie: on a whole list of numbers on the back cover of the phone book. .08 ::COVER :=Jessie: Next time you wash this cover, it'll dry better if you put it on .08 ::COVER :=Jessie: been looking forward to. I washed this cover for the sofa, but it'll take both of .10 ::COVER :=Jessie: We made some hot chocolate and put the cover back on the sofa. You had no idea. .05 ::COW :=Jessie: out of that. Or sit up with a sick cow all night and leave me a chain of sleepy .02 ::CRAZY :=Mama: You will not! This is crazy talk, Jessie! .04 ::CRAZY :=Jessie: That's crazy. .04 ::CRAZY :=Jessie: Is she really crazy or just silly? .04 ::CRAZY :=Mama: No, she's really crazy. She was probably using the pay phone .04 ::CRAZY :=Mama: O.K. Yes, then, but she's crazy. She's as crazy as they come. She's .04 ::CRAZY :=Mama: Yes, then, but she's crazy. She's as crazy as they come. She's a lunatic. .04 ::CRAZY :=Mama: expect to get away with it. Made her crazy. .07 ::CREEK :=Jessie: I loved that bridge he built over the creek in back of the house. It didn't have .05 ::CREEPY :=Mama: pigs, a dog with a bad leg -- it was creepy strange. It made me sick to look at .09 ::CRIED :=Jessie: heard of sick and lonely, somebody who cried and got fed, and reached up and got .01 ::CRIME :=Mama: Ricky is mixed up. That's not a crime. .01 ::CRIMINAL :=Mama: too serious, hon. I've never seen a criminal in my life. This is way too far .01 ::CRIMINALS :=Mama: And I told you, we don't get criminals out here. .01 ::CRIMINALS :=Mama: how's that? Whatever they want, the criminals. .03 ::CROCHET :=Jessie: Like crochet. .03 ::CROCHET :=Mama: I'll teach you to crochet. .10 ::CROCHET :=Mama: that's always good. And I'll have some crochet work with me. .03 ::CROWDED :=Jessie: the bus and it's hot and bumpy and crowded and too noisy and more than anything .08 ::CRUMPLE :=Mama: There's not much to tell. You just -- crumple, in a heap, like a puppet and somebody .04 ::CUP :=Mama: Why are you asking about Agnes? One cup or two? .05 ::CUPS :=Mama: And throw out all the plates and cups. I'll use paper. Loretta can have what .06 ::CURLY :=Jessie: God knows what you thought. All that curly hair. .08 ::CURSE :=Jessie: does not. It's just a sickness, not a curse. Epilepsy doesn't mean anything. It .01 ::CUSHION :=Jessie: some old pillows anywhere, or a foam cushion out of a yard chair would be real .08 ::CUT :=Mama: can't do anything, wash your face or cut your finger, without doing it to me. .08 ::CUT :=Mama: in a heap, like a puppet and somebody cut the strings all at once, or like the .03 ::DAD'S :=Mama: You could keep books. You kept your dad's books. .05 ::DADDY :=Jessie: Did you love Daddy? .05 ::DADDY :=Jessie: I want to know what Daddy said to you the night he died. You .07 ::DADDY :=Mama: let you just sit here? Sit like your daddy? Sit here? .08 ::DADDY :=Jessie: Daddy would've known if he'd had fits, M .08 ::DADDY :=Jessie: was mine to know, Mama, not yours. Did Daddy know? .08 ::DADDY :=Mama: Your daddy gave you those fits, Jessie. He passed .08 ::DADDY :=Mama: I think your daddy had fits, too. I think he sat in his .08 ::DADDY :=Mama: Jessie, I think your daddy had little... .01 ::DADDY'S :=Jessie: till you're ready for them. Where's Daddy's gun? .02 ::DADDY'S :=Jessie: find this one, but I'd rather use Daddy's. .03 ::DADDY'S :=Jessie: hang a big sign around my neck, like Daddy's on the barn. GONE FISHING. .08 ::DADDY'S :=Mama: you started to school. More like your daddy's. Oh, that was some swell time, sitting .09 ::DADDY'S :=Mama: sneak them a piece of candy when their daddy's not looking and then be real glad .10 ::DADDY'S :=Jessie: you liked that preacher who did Daddy's, so if you want to ask him to do .10 ::DADDY'S :=Jessie: your dress cleaned that you wore to Daddy's. You looked real good in that. .05 ::DANCE :=Jessie: smile like the stick man was about to dance and wasn't I going to get a kick out .09 ::DARE :=Mama: Jessie! How dare you! How dare you! You think you can .09 ::DARE :=Mama: Jessie! How dare you! How dare you! You think you can just leave whenever .02 ::DARK :=Jessie: It's exactly what I want. It's dark and quiet. .10 ::DAVIS :=Mama: you didn't tell me what to tell Dr. Davis when he calls or how much you want .08 ::DAVIS'S :=Jessie: Put it out as late as you can. The Davis's dogs get in it if you don't. And .01 ::DAWSON :=Jessie: Dawson better not've taken that pistol. .01 ::DAWSON :=Jessie: Dawson could probably use some of those clothes .01 ::DAWSON :=Mama: Dawson took the shotgun, didn't he? Hand .01 ::DAWSON :=Mama: I thought Dawson told you not to go up those stair .02 ::DAWSON :=Jessie: Dawson doesn't have any more to do with .02 ::DAWSON :=Jessie: Feed store Dawson told me about. .02 ::DAWSON :=Jessie: I said no. This is private. Dawson is not invited. .02 ::DAWSON :=Jessie: else over here. Just you and me. If Dawson comes over, it'll make me feel stupid .02 ::DAWSON :=Jessie: me a new housecoat, pink probably, and Dawson got me new slippers, too small, but .02 ::DAWSON :=Jessie: the milk can, I guess. Anyway, I asked Dawson if he thought they'd send me some .02 ::DAWSON :=Jessie: walk in the bedroom and lock the door. Dawson will get here just in time to help .02 ::DAWSON :=Mama: Dawson will put a stop to this. Yes he will. .02 ::DAWSON :=Mama: Dawson! .02 ::DAWSON :=Mama: Well, I'm calling Dawson right now. We'll just see what he .03 ::DAWSON :=Jessie: are under the sink, but you call Dawson if you've got one and let him do .03 ::DAWSON :=Jessie: Mama. When the call comes, you let Dawson handle it. .03 ::DAWSON :=Jessie: but if the lights go out, just call Dawson and sit tight. But don't open the .03 ::DAWSON :=Jessie: you order your medicine or do you want Dawson to? I've got a note to him. I'll add .03 ::DAWSON :=Mama: What does Dawson do, that bothers you? .03 ::DAWSON :=Mama: ever have to come over here again. Dawson can just leave her at home when he .03 ::DAWSON :=Mama: comes. And we don't ever have to see Dawson either if he bothers you. Does he .05 ::DAWSON :=Mama: Loretta can have what she wants and Dawson can sell the rest. .05 ::DAWSON :=Mama: out to the lake and sit in his car. Dawson told me. And Bennie at the bait shop, .05 ::DAWSON :=Mama: And Bennie at the bait shop, he told Dawson. They all laughed about it. And he'd .06 ::DAWSON :=Jessie: an egg box, and you give the bills to Dawson once a month. .08 ::DAWSON :=Mama: I call Dawson. But I get you cleaned up before he .09 ::DAWSON :=Jessie: Agnes burning down one more house or Dawson losing his hair or... .09 ::DAWSON :=Jessie: thought about it all and I say no. To Dawson and Loretta and the Red Chinese and .09 ::DAWSON :=Mama: of you. Yes. Ashamed! If somebody asks Dawson about it, he'll change the subject .10 ::DAWSON :=Jessie: This letter is for Dawson, but it's mostly about you, so read .10 ::DAWSON :=Jessie: I don't want you to wake Dawson and Loretta when you call. I want .10 ::DAWSON :=Jessie: but I don't want you trying. Call Dawson, then call the police, and then call .10 ::DAWSON :=Jessie: Loretta to have my little calculator. Dawson bought it for himself, you know, but .10 ::DAWSON :=Jessie: how that goes. You stay out here with Dawson and Loretta. You keep Dawson out here. .10 ::DAWSON :=Jessie: never worn any of them, and make sure Dawson hears you tell her that. I'm glad .10 ::DAWSON :=Jessie: here with Dawson and Loretta. You keep Dawson out here. I want the police in the .10 ::DAWSON :=Jessie: want the police in the room first, not Dawson, O.K.? .10 ::DAWSON :=Mama: What if Dawson and Loretta want me to go home with .10 ::DAWSON :=Mama: Is that what I tell Dawson and Loretta, too? We sat around, you .10 ::DAWSON :=Mama: Loretta, let me talk to Dawson, honey. .10 ::DAWSON :=Mama: he did and I'll give Ricky's watch to Dawson if I feel like it and the only way .01 ::DAWSON'S :=Mama: that peanut brittle? I think maybe Dawson's been in it again. I ought to put .03 ::DAWSON'S :=Jessie: talk. The account at the grocery is in Dawson's name when you call. The number's .01 ::DAY :=Mama: get back in school or get a job or one day you'll get a call and he'll say he's .02 ::DAY :=Mama: he died. He dropped it in the mud one day. .03 ::DAY :=Jessie: What would you do all day? .03 ::DAY :=Jessie: I wonder that myself, but it's my day, so it's mine to wonder about, not h .03 ::DAY :=Jessie: get such a glare on it during the day. I'll do whatever you want before I .03 ::DAY :=Jessie: And if you want your order the same day, you have to call before ten. And they .03 ::DAY :=Jessie: He's always wondering what I do all day. I mean, I wonder that myself, but it's .03 ::DAY :=Mama: for me. I can fill pill bottles all day, Jessie, and change the shelf paper and .04 ::DAY :=Jessie: She really eats okra twice a day? Where does she get it in the winter .04 ::DAY :=Mama: fire, and she's due for a new one any day now. .04 ::DAY :=Mama: just willy-nilly eat okra two meals a day and expect to get away with it. Made .05 ::DAY :=Jessie: if the birds bothered you, well, one day when Agnes is out getting her hair done, .05 ::DAY :=Mama: were a runt and he said it from the day you were born and he said you didn't .05 ::DAY :=Mama: was probably all he'd said to me all day, Jessie. So if he said it, there was .05 ::DAY :=Mama: him somehow. Like I remember this one day he was standing on the porch and I told .06 ::DAY :=Jessie: his idea to go horseback riding that day. It was his idea I could do anything .08 ::DAY :=Mama: between five and five hundred fits a day and they lasted maybe fifteen seconds .09 ::DAY :=Jessie: up knowing some new trick nearly every day, and rolled over and drooled on the sheet .09 ::DAY :=Mama: How can I -- How can I get up every day knowing you had to kill yourself to make .09 ::DAY :=Mama: coffee and watching me get older every day, and you're supposed to help me die when .09 ::DAY :=Mama: right here in the house. And maybe one day you'll put in some begonias up the walk .10 ::DAY :=Jessie: I found hanging on the door one day. .09 ::DAYS :=Mama: he has to pay to park his car these days. .10 ::DAYS :=Jessie: could come stay with you for a few days. .02 ::DEAD :=Jessie: Dead is everybody and everything I ever knew, .02 ::DEAD :=Jessie: and everything I ever knew, gone. Dead is dead quiet. .02 ::DEAD :=Jessie: everything I ever knew, gone. Dead is dead quiet. .02 ::DEAD :=Mama: You don't know what dead is like. It might not be quiet at all. .04 ::DEAD :=Jessie: Buster to build her a new one, he's dead. How could she burn it up? .09 ::DEAD :=Mama: more to go, Jessie. And as soon as I'm dead, you can do whatever you want. Maybe .04 ::DEATH :=Mama: Agnes. "Jessie's shook the hand of death and I can't take the chance it's catching, .09 ::DECIDED :=Jessie: Anyway, after Christmas, after I decided to do this, I would wonder, sometimes, .03 ::DELIVER :=Jessie: The grocery won't deliver on Saturday anymore. And if you want .03 ::DELIVER :=Jessie: to call before ten. And they won't deliver less than fifteen dollars' worth. .03 ::DELIVERED :=Jessie: got it. Like my mail-order bra got delivered to their house. .06 ::DELIVERING :=Jessie: I told them to keep delivering a quart a week no matter what .03 ::DENTIST :=Mama: swelling again, we can get you to the dentist in the morning. .02 ::DERANGED :=Mama: make sense, unless you're retarded or deranged, and you're as normal as they come, .01 ::DID :=Jessie: He did. .01 ::DID :=Mama: your mess first? We're out of these. Did I say that already? .01 ::DID :=Mama: me I could have them back, but I never did like those shoes. .02 ::DID :=Mama: Where did you get those? .03 ::DID :=Jessie: I did like that King dog, yes. .03 ::DID :=Jessie: I know you did. .03 ::DID :=Jessie: And it's time I did something about it. .03 ::DID :=Jessie: smiling at them the way I did. .03 ::DID :=Mama: What did I do? .03 ::DID :=Mama: But I didn't force you, did I? .03 ::DID :=Mama: next? Nothing wrong with it. Mom did it. .03 ::DID :=Mama: all ready to say to me, didn't you? Did you write this down? How long have you .04 ::DID :=Jessie: What is it exactly? Did I say something, sometime? Or did she .04 ::DID :=Jessie: Did I say something, sometime? Or did she see me have a fit and's afraid I .04 ::DID :=Mama: Be exciting, though, if she did. You never know. .05 ::DID :=Jessie: Did you love Daddy? .05 ::DID :=Jessie: I didn't think you did, that's all. .05 ::DID :=Jessie: You didn't ever love him, or he did something and you stopped loving him, .05 ::DID :=Jessie: know. I liked him better than you did, but I didn't know him any better. .05 ::DID :=Jessie: you were going to watch Gunsmoke. What did he say to you? .05 ::DID :=Mama: What did you talk about? .05 ::DID :=Mama: What if he did? It didn't change anything. .05 ::DID :=Mama: of chewing tobacco and all he ever did was drive out to the lake and sit in .05 ::DID :=Mama: were you asking about him for? Why did you want to know if I loved him? .05 ::DID :=Mama: he wouldn't have taken you in like I did. .05 ::DID :=Mama: I never did figure that one out. What did that mean? .05 ::DID :=Mama: like some -- Jessie, all the man ever did was farm and sit -- and try to think .05 ::DID :=Mama: I knew you wouldn't like it. You never did like it. .05 ::DID :=Mama: there was something to it, but I never did figure that one out. What did that m .06 ::DID :=Jessie: about? You liked him better than I did. You flirted him out here to build your .06 ::DID :=Jessie: didn't bother him at all. Except he did feel responsible for it. It was his idea .06 ::DID :=Jessie: to call the ambulance for me. All they did for me in the emergency room was let .06 ::DID :=Mama: Nothing I ever did was good enough for you and I want to .06 ::DID :=Mama: you fall off the horse, really? Why did Cecil leave you? Where did you put my .06 ::DID :=Mama: a fit, do you see stars or what? How did you fall off the horse, really? Why did .06 ::DID :=Mama: cocoa. You never like eating at all, did you? Any of it! What have you been living .06 ::DID :=Mama: really? Why did Cecil leave you? Where did you put my old glasses? .07 ::DID :=Jessie: Well, what did you know? .07 ::DID :=Jessie: Yes I do and so did Cecil. Ricky is the two of us together .07 ::DID :=Jessie: and you know who laid that floor, I did. .07 ::DID :=Jessie: another chance, that's all. But I did beg him to take me with him. I did tell .07 ::DID :=Jessie: around me like they do. I think he did the right thing. He gave himself another .07 ::DID :=Jessie: I did beg him to take me with him. I did tell him I would leave Ricky and you .07 ::DID :=Mama: know enough to do half the things I did in my life. Things happen. You do what .08 ::DID :=Jessie: I did not. .08 ::DID :=Jessie: What did the doctor say? .08 ::DID :=Jessie: How many fits did I have? .08 ::DID :=Jessie: was mine to know, Mama, not yours. Did Daddy know? .08 ::DID :=Mama: You did! You were eating a popsicle and down .08 ::DID :=Mama: Maybe I did drop you, you don't know. .08 ::DID :=Mama: I don't know what I did, but I did it, I know. This is all my fault, Jessie, .08 ::DID :=Mama: it put together. I don't know what I did, but I did it, I know. This is all my .08 ::DID :=Mama: carrying you. It has to be something I did. .09 ::DID :=Jessie: Sure you can. You just did. Say it again. .10 ::DID :=Jessie: Well, then, tell them what we did. I filled up the candy jars. I cleaned .10 ::DID :=Jessie: him to find Ricky and tell him what I did, and tell Ricky you have something for .10 ::DID :=Jessie: I remember you liked that preacher who did Daddy's, so if you want to ask him to .10 ::DID :=Jessie: Now, somebody's bound to ask you why I did it and you just say you don't know. That .10 ::DID :=Mama: When did you do all this? During my naps, I g .10 ::DID :=Mama: man he was to make you feel the way he did and I'll give Ricky's watch to Dawson .01 ::DIDN'T :=Jessie: How would you know if I didn't say it? You want it to be a surprise? .01 ::DIDN'T :=Mama: I didn't think you would shoot your own boy, .01 ::DIDN'T :=Mama: Well, you didn't look good enough, then. There's that .01 ::DIDN'T :=Mama: Dawson took the shotgun, didn't he? Hand me that basket, hon. .02 ::DIDN'T :=Jessie: I didn't know I thought that. .02 ::DIDN'T :=Jessie: that swimming towel and you said you didn't. .03 ::DIDN'T :=Jessie: I took that telephone sales job and I didn't even make enough money to pay the .03 ::DIDN'T :=Mama: You didn't have any business being by yourself .03 ::DIDN'T :=Mama: But I didn't force you, did I? .03 ::DIDN'T :=Mama: Maybe if she didn't wear that yellow all the time. .03 ::DIDN'T :=Mama: I started to, but I didn't. I didn't call him. .03 ::DIDN'T :=Mama: I started to, but I didn't. I didn't call him. .03 ::DIDN'T :=Mama: You had this all ready to say to me, didn't you? Did you write this down? How .03 ::DIDN'T :=Mama: dog, now, didn't you? That King dog, didn't you? .03 ::DIDN'T :=Mama: dog, Jessie! You liked a big dog, now, didn't you? That King dog, didn't you? .04 ::DIDN'T :=Jessie: I didn't know she had a house full of bird .04 ::DIDN'T :=Jessie: Why didn't you tell me this before? Why isn't .04 ::DIDN'T :=Jessie: I thought she didn't like me! She's scared of me! How about .04 ::DIDN'T :=Jessie: That you could ever tell, you mean. You didn't have to lie to me about Agnes. .04 ::DIDN'T :=Mama: I didn't lie. You never asked before! .04 ::DIDN'T :=Mama: You didn't eat a bite of supper. .04 ::DIDN'T :=Mama: bring the birds and come visit. I didn't know you ever thought about her at .05 ::DIDN'T :=Jessie: I didn't think so. Were you really fifteen .05 ::DIDN'T :=Jessie: I didn't think you did, that's all. .05 ::DIDN'T :=Jessie: He didn't mean anything by that, Mama. .05 ::DIDN'T :=Jessie: It didn't have to. I miss him. .05 ::DIDN'T :=Jessie: You didn't ever love him, or he did something .05 ::DIDN'T :=Jessie: I'm sorry you didn't love him. Sorry for you, I mean. He .05 ::DIDN'T :=Jessie: Not anymore. He didn't mean to. I didn't have to come here. .05 ::DIDN'T :=Jessie: Not anymore. He didn't mean to. I didn't have to come here. We've been through .05 ::DIDN'T :=Jessie: I liked him better than you did, but I didn't know him any better. .05 ::DIDN'T :=Mama: He didn't have anything to say to me, Jessie. .05 ::DIDN'T :=Mama: It didn't matter whether I loved him. It didn't .05 ::DIDN'T :=Mama: What if he did? It didn't change anything. .05 ::DIDN'T :=Mama: He never said a word he didn't have to, Jessie. That was probably .05 ::DIDN'T :=Mama: How could I love him, Jessie. I didn't have a thing he wanted. He got his .05 ::DIDN'T :=Mama: get along. It wasn't important. We didn't talk about it. Take all these pots .05 ::DIDN'T :=Mama: him. It didn't matter to me and it didn't matter to him. And it didn't mean .05 ::DIDN'T :=Mama: matter to him. And it didn't mean we didn't get along. It wasn't important. We .05 ::DIDN'T :=Mama: to me, Jessie. That's why I left. He didn't say a thing. It was his last chance .05 ::DIDN'T :=Mama: didn't matter whether I loved him. It didn't matter to me and it didn't matter .05 ::DIDN'T :=Mama: the day you were born and he said you didn't have a chance. .05 ::DIDN'T :=Mama: me and it didn't matter to him. And it didn't mean we didn't get along. It wasn't .06 ::DIDN'T :=Jessie: You didn't need a porch, Mama. .06 ::DIDN'T :=Jessie: They didn't bother him at all. Except he did feel .06 ::DIDN'T :=Jessie: I take you with me? And I said I didn't think you'd want to go, and they said, .06 ::DIDN'T :=Jessie: to. I fell off the horse because I didn't know how to hold on. Cecil left for .06 ::DIDN'T :=Jessie: They said it was about time, but why didn't I take you with me? And I said I didn't .06 ::DIDN'T :=Mama: And they didn't think something was funny about that? .07 ::DIDN'T :=Jessie: the creek in back of the house. It didn't have to be anything special, a couple .07 ::DIDN'T :=Jessie: mind? No. He loved me, Mama. He just didn't know how things fall down around me .07 ::DIDN'T :=Jessie: bed he built for Ricky. I told him he didn't have to spend so much time on it, .07 ::DIDN'T :=Jessie: but he always knew I was trying, so it didn't work. .07 ::DIDN'T :=Mama: He didn't love you, Jessie, or he wouldn't have .07 ::DIDN'T :=Mama: Well, I didn't think so. .07 ::DIDN'T :=Mama: to learn anything living out here? I didn't know enough to do half the things .07 ::DIDN'T :=Mama: Go downtown. Find him. Talk to him. He didn't know what he had in you. Maybe he .08 ::DIDN'T :=Jessie: But I didn't have another one. .08 ::DIDN'T :=Jessie: But you didn't tell anybody. .08 ::DIDN'T :=Jessie: Because you didn't tell him! .08 ::DIDN'T :=Jessie: If you say you didn't, you didn't. .08 ::DIDN'T :=Jessie: If you say you didn't, you didn't. .08 ::DIDN'T :=Jessie: take all the rest of it if only I didn't have you here? What if the only way .08 ::DIDN'T :=Mama: I didn't think you'd like it. That's why I .08 ::DIDN'T :=Mama: I didn't want anybody to know. Least of all .08 ::DIDN'T :=Mama: think you'd like it. That's why I didn't tell you. .08 ::DIDN'T :=Mama: I felt about your father. Because I didn't want any more children. Because I .08 ::DIDN'T :=Mama: Maybe you had a fever sometime and I didn't know it soon enough. Maybe it's a .08 ::DIDN'T :=Mama: it's me for giving them to you, but I didn't do it! .08 ::DIDN'T :=Mama: you. I don't know what he thought. He didn't think about it. .08 ::DIDN'T :=Mama: children. Because I smoked too much or didn't eat right when I was carrying you. .08 ::DIDN'T :=Mama: wouldn't be doing this if it wasn't. I didn't tell you things or I married you off .09 ::DIDN'T :=Jessie: you could say to change my mind. I didn't want you to save me. I just wanted .09 ::DIDN'T :=Jessie: I'm what was worth waiting for and I didn't make it. Me -- who might have made .09 ::DIDN'T :=Jessie: reached up and got held and kicked but didn't hurt anybody, and slept whenever she .10 ::DIDN'T :=Jessie: you might like to have it, but I didn't think you'd wear it if I gave it to .10 ::DIDN'T :=Jessie: you think you've lost. Things you didn't know you had, even. You'll see. .10 ::DIDN'T :=Mama: where my prescriptions are and you didn't tell me what to tell Dr. Davis when .10 ::DIDN'T :=Mama: You can't go. You can't do this. You didn't say it would be so soon, Jessie. I'm .10 ::DIDN'T :=Mama: make me, Jessie! Jessie! Stop this! I didn't know! I was here with you all the .01 ::DIE :=Mama: you can have it if you want. When I die, you'll get it all, anyway. .02 ::DIE :=Mama: for the most part. We're all afraid to die. .09 ::DIE :=Mama: day, and you're supposed to help me die when the time comes. I can't do that .09 ::DIE :=Mama: I hate the quiet and I don't want to die and I don't want you to go, Jessie. How .01 ::DIED :=Mama: ones he wore to the hospital. When he died, they told me I could have them back, .02 ::DIED :=Mama: you know. He broke it right before he died. He dropped it in the mud one day. .03 ::DIED :=Mama: When he died, they checked them. .05 ::DIED :=Jessie: it might be better for you after he died. You'd get interested in things. Breathe .05 ::DIED :=Jessie: what Daddy said to you the night he died. You came storming out of his room and .05 ::DIED :=Mama: Oh, I see. He died and left you stuck with me and you're .05 ::DIED :=Mama: talk to him than anything! If I had died instead of him, he wouldn't have taken .04 ::DIFFERENCE :=Jessie: What difference does that make? .07 ::DIFFERENCE :=Jessie: the same thing: Not Fair. And the only difference between us is Ricky's out there .09 ::DIFFERENCE :=Jessie: make it. Me -- who might have made a difference to me -- I'm not going to show .07 ::DIFFERENT :=Mama: he had in you. Maybe he sees things different now, but you're not going to know .08 ::DIFFERENT :=Jessie: I'd had one, except I wake up with different clothes on, feeling like I've been .08 ::DIFFERENT :=Mama: Different each time, Jess. .04 ::DISGUSTING :=Mama: bad as okra. Something just downright disgusting about it. .03 ::DISHES :=Mama: Something like -- buying us all new dishes! I'd like that. Or maybe the doctor .05 ::DISHES :=Jessie: I'd rather talk to him than wash the dishes with you. .04 ::DIVING :=Jessie: Sure we do. Plus there's no birds diving around. .03 ::DIVORCE :=Mama: on right now. If it was after your divorce or something, that would make se .08 ::DIZZY :=Jessie: scream. And sometimes there is this dizzy stupid feeling a little before it, .01 ::DO :=Jessie: Neither do I. Wash your hands. .01 ::DO :=Jessie: Which shoebox, do you remember? .01 ::DO :=Jessie: Your hands aren't washed. Do you want a manicure or not? .01 ::DO :=Jessie: sheet or something. Garbage bags would do if there's enough. .01 ::DO :=Mama: What do you want the gun for, Jess? .01 ::DO :=Mama: Yes, I do, but... .01 ::DO :=Mama: like shooting somebody, but we don't do it. I just don't think we need... .02 ::DO :=Jessie: Dawson doesn't have any more to do with this. .02 ::DO :=Jessie: If you call him, I'll just have to do it before he gets here. Soon as you hang .02 ::DO :=Jessie: Then call Loretta and see if she'll do your nails. .02 ::DO :=Mama: How could he do that? .02 ::DO :=Mama: No. You can't do it. I won't let you. The house is in my .02 ::DO :=Mama: It's mine now, too. And you can't do it in my house. .03 ::DO :=Jessie: You do something else. You don't just wait. .03 ::DO :=Jessie: I'll do that. If you want. I always thought if .03 ::DO :=Jessie: I can't do any of that nice work, Mama. .03 ::DO :=Jessie: O.K. Where do we keep the soap? .03 ::DO :=Jessie: You wouldn't do that. .03 ::DO :=Jessie: What would you do all day? .03 ::DO :=Jessie: If I thought I could do that, I would stay. .03 ::DO :=Jessie: No. You can't. And I can't do anything either, about my life, to change .03 ::DO :=Jessie: any time. What good would a job do? The kind of job I could get would make .03 ::DO :=Jessie: to. He's always wondering what I do all day. I mean, I wonder that myself, .03 ::DO :=Jessie: You know I couldn't work. I can't do anything. I've never been around people .03 ::DO :=Jessie: yeah. You have things you like to do. .03 ::DO :=Jessie: No. Can you order your medicine or do you want Dawson to? I've got a note to .03 ::DO :=Jessie: a glare on it during the day. I'll do whatever you want before I go. .03 ::DO :=Jessie: me do it so I'll have something to do, haven't you? .03 ::DO :=Jessie: No. It's a funny idea, though. What do you sing? .03 ::DO :=Jessie: than fifteen dollars' worth. What I do is tell them what we need and tell them .03 ::DO :=Jessie: Dawson if you've got one and let him do it. .03 ::DO :=Jessie: am worried about you, but I'm going to do what I can before I go. We're not just .03 ::DO :=Jessie: know that. You've just been letting me do it so I'll have something to do, haven't .03 ::DO :=Mama: You do too much for me. I can fill pill bottles .03 ::DO :=Mama: What do they know about you? I'll tell them never .03 ::DO :=Mama: I don't do it as well as you. I just meant if it .03 ::DO :=Mama: What did I do? .03 ::DO :=Mama: But I can't do anything about that! .03 ::DO :=Mama: What does Dawson do, that bothers you? .03 ::DO :=Mama: Whatever else you find to do, you're still mainly waiting. The waiting's .03 ::DO :=Mama: what you pay somebody else to do, if you can. .03 ::DO :=Mama: Whoever promised you a good time? Do you think I've had a good time? .03 ::DO :=Mama: license now, or I know what let's do right this minute, let's rearrange the .03 ::DO :=Mama: I'm not letting you alone till you do. What were those other things? Hurt -- .03 ::DO :=Mama: You just watch me. You don't have to do another thing in this house if you don't .03 ::DO :=Mama: boring and you don't have anything to do and you don't like me and you don't like .03 ::DO :=Mama: doing the wash, we can get Loretta to do it. .04 ::DO :=Jessie: Do you know how much okra Agnes eats? .04 ::DO :=Jessie: You do too know, Mama. She wouldn't do it. .04 ::DO :=Jessie: Sure we do. Plus there's no birds diving around. .04 ::DO :=Jessie: I know you do. .04 ::DO :=Jessie: You do too know, Mama. She wouldn't do it. .04 ::DO :=Jessie: I'd like to have a caramel apple and do your nails. .04 ::DO :=Mama: Why do you have to know so much about things, .05 ::DO :=Jessie: Don't do that! I just straightened that drawer .05 ::DO :=Mama: Fine then. You were right. Do you feel better now? .05 ::DO :=Mama: her to bring a pan. You said you would do whatever I wanted! I don't want a bunch .06 ::DO :=Jessie: that day. It was his idea I could do anything if I just made up my mind to. .06 ::DO :=Mama: Do they still make that orangeade? .06 ::DO :=Mama: Why do you read the newspaper? Why don't you .06 ::DO :=Mama: here this long feeling the way you do. .06 ::DO :=Mama: it like over there, where you are? Do people always say the right thing or get .06 ::DO :=Mama: old woman now? When you have a fit, do you see stars or what? How did you fall .06 ::DO :=Mama: you wear that sweater I made for you? Do you remember how I used to look, or am .07 ::DO :=Jessie: Yes I do and so did Cecil. Ricky is the two of .07 ::DO :=Jessie: things fall down around me like they do. I think he did the right thing. He gave .07 ::DO :=Mama: out here? I didn't know enough to do half the things I did in my life. Things .07 ::DO :=Mama: I did in my life. Things happen. You do what you can about them and you see what .08 ::DO :=Jessie: Do it for me. Make the sound for me. .08 ::DO :=Jessie: How do I get to the bed? .08 ::DO :=Jessie: What do they look like? The seizures. .08 ::DO :=Jessie: Doesn't look like you do, no. .08 ::DO :=Jessie: It doesn't have anything to do with you! .08 ::DO :=Jessie: I'm too heavy for you now. How do you do it? .08 ::DO :=Jessie: myself? What if it is? I can still do it! .08 ::DO :=Jessie: not afraid it will start a fit if I do, I just go ahead. .08 ::DO :=Jessie: I'm too heavy for you now. How do you do it? .08 ::DO :=Jessie: it does! What if it has everything to do with you! What if you are all I have and .08 ::DO :=Mama: How do you tell that to a five-year-old? .08 ::DO :=Mama: How do you think? .08 ::DO :=Mama: Yes. I do. I want to say... .08 ::DO :=Mama: Of course you do! You can even scream at me, if you want .08 ::DO :=Mama: Everything you do has to do with me, Jessie. You can't do .08 ::DO :=Mama: Everything you do has to do with me, Jessie. You can't do anything, .08 ::DO :=Mama: for a solid year. A whole year, do you realize that? .08 ::DO :=Mama: Jessie, but I don't know what to do about it now! .08 ::DO :=Mama: it's the same thing. This has to do with me, Jessie. .08 ::DO :=Mama: for giving them to you, but I didn't do it! .08 ::DO :=Mama: has to do with me, Jessie. You can't do anything, wash your face or cut your finger, .08 ::DO :=Mama: time. He said there wasn't anything to do but wait for another one. .09 ::DO :=Jessie: Don't you see, Mama, everything I do winds up like th is. How could I think .09 ::DO :=Jessie: after Christmas, after I decided to do this, I would wonder, sometimes, what .09 ::DO :=Mama: And as soon as I'm dead, you can do whatever you want. Maybe with me gone, .09 ::DO :=Mama: you to stay alive, and I couldn't do it. How can I live with myself after th .09 ::DO :=Mama: sweetheart. This is just like you. Do it the hard way, that's my girl, all right. .09 ::DO :=Mama: me die when the time comes. I can't do that by myself, Jessie. I'm not like you, .09 ::DO :=Mama: maybe I can't think of what you should do, but that doesn't mean there isn't something .10 ::DO :=Jessie: They'll do that gunpowder test, I guess, and ask .10 ::DO :=Jessie: And then you'll need something to do till somebody gets here, so wash the hot .10 ::DO :=Jessie: Daddy's, so if you want to ask him to do the service, that's O.K. with me. .10 ::DO :=Jessie: Don't try and stop me, Mama, you can't do it. .10 ::DO :=Mama: What do you want me to tell him? .10 ::DO :=Mama: When did you do all this? During my naps, I guess. .10 ::DO :=Mama: You said you wanted to do my nails. .10 ::DO :=Mama: Jessie! Jessie! What if I don't do any of the things you told me to do! I'll .10 ::DO :=Mama: I can't. You can't go. You can't do this. You didn't say it would be so soon, .10 ::DO :=Mama: They don't matter here, Jessie. You do. I do. We're not through yet. We've got .10 ::DO :=Mama: do any of the things you told me to do! I'll tell Cecil what a miserable man .10 ::DO :=Mama: just sit. I won't need something to do. What will the police say? .10 ::DO :=Mama: and the only way you can make sure I do what you want is you come out here and .10 ::DO :=Mama: don't matter here, Jessie. You do. I do. We're not through yet. We've got a lot .10 ::DO :=Mama: Jessie, you let me in there. Don't you do this, Jessie. I'm not going to stop screaming .02 ::DOCTOR :=Mama: I think we better call the doctor. Or how about the ambulance. You like .02 ::DOCTOR :=Mama: Shoot your ear off? You know what the doctor said about getting excited. You'll .03 ::DOCTOR :=Mama: dishes! I'd like that. Or maybe the doctor would let you get a driver's license .08 ::DOCTOR :=Jessie: What did the doctor say? .01 ::DOES :=Mama: it when the coconut falls off. Why does the coconut fall off? .03 ::DOES :=Jessie: Sure he does. Be sure you clean out the lint tray .03 ::DOES :=Mama: What does Dawson do, that bothers you? .03 ::DOES :=Mama: What does that mean? .03 ::DOES :=Mama: see Dawson either if he bothers you. Does he bother you? .04 ::DOES :=Jessie: Does that mean I can't have a caramel ap .04 ::DOES :=Jessie: How many birds does she have? .04 ::DOES :=Jessie: What else? Why does she wear all those whistles around her .04 ::DOES :=Jessie: What difference does that make? .04 ::DOES :=Jessie: about it. When I'm in the hospital, does she come over here? .04 ::DOES :=Jessie: She really eats okra twice a day? Where does she get it in the winter? .04 ::DOES :=Mama: Why does she have a house full of birds? .04 ::DOES :=Mama: Well, she does. And she says they just follow her home. .05 ::DOES :=Mama: Not enough, though, does it? You can still taste it, can't y .07 ::DOES :=Jessie: I couldn't move it. I said, "How long does a baby bed have to last, anyway?" But .08 ::DOES :=Jessie: It does not. It's just a sickness, not a curse. .08 ::DOES :=Jessie: Then what if it does! What if it has everything to do with .10 ::DOES :=Jessie: counting every penny the way she does, so he gave the first one to me. Be .10 ::DOES :=Mama: Maybe if Connie Richards does come, I can get her to tell me where .01 ::DOESN'T :=Jessie: That doesn't help much, Mother. .02 ::DOESN'T :=Jessie: Dawson doesn't have any more to do with this. .02 ::DOESN'T :=Mama: kill themselves, Jessie. No, mam, doesn't make sense, unless you're retarded .03 ::DOESN'T :=Mama: Loretta doesn't ever have to come over here again. .06 ::DOESN'T :=Mama: was funny about that? You who doesn't go to the front steps? You, who only .08 ::DOESN'T :=Jessie: Doesn't look like you do, no. .08 ::DOESN'T :=Jessie: It doesn't have anything to do with you! .08 ::DOESN'T :=Jessie: just a sickness, not a curse. Epilepsy doesn't mean anything. It just is. .08 ::DOESN'T :=Jessie: keep ordering the heavy black bags. It doesn't pay to buy the cheap ones. And I've .09 ::DOESN'T :=Jessie: came. And never will. So, see, it doesn't much matter what else happens in .09 ::DOESN'T :=Mama: think of what you should do, but that doesn't mean there isn't something that would .10 ::DOESN'T :=Jessie: he'll feel like a real jerk if he doesn't. Me telling him to, like this and .10 ::DOESN'T :=Mama: Irish yarn, she calls it. I know it doesn't come from Ireland. I think it just .03 ::DOG :=Jessie: I did like that King dog, yes. .03 ::DOG :=Mama: Let's get another dog, Jessie! You liked a big dog, now, didn't .03 ::DOG :=Mama: We could get a new dog and keep him in the house. Dogs are .03 ::DOG :=Mama: another dog, Jessie! You liked a big dog, now, didn't you? That King dog, didn't .03 ::DOG :=Mama: a big dog, now, didn't you? That King dog, didn't you? .05 ::DOG :=Mama: family -- chickens, pigs, a dog with a bad leg -- it was creepy strange. .08 ::DOG :=Jessie: Foaming like a mad dog the whole time. .03 ::DOGS :=Mama: a new dog and keep him in the house. Dogs are cheap! .08 ::DOGS :=Jessie: it out as late as you can. The Davis's dogs get in it if you don't. And keep ordering .01 ::DOING :=Mama: What are you doing? .01 ::DOING :=Mama: What have you been doing in there? .02 ::DOING :=Jessie: It is! I'm still doing your nails, though. Want to try that .02 ::DOING :=Jessie: See? Everybody's doing what they can. .02 ::DOING :=Jessie: it'll make me feel stupid for not doing it ten years ago. .03 ::DOING :=Mama: If you're doing this because of the newspapers, I can .03 ::DOING :=Mama: If you're mad about doing the wash, we can get Loretta to do .05 ::DOING :=Jessie: What are you doing? .08 ::DOING :=Mama: the matter here. You wouldn't be doing this if it wasn't. I didn't tell you .08 ::DOING :=Mama: your face or cut your finger, without doing it to me. That's right! You might as .09 ::DOING :=Jessie: Mama, but it's exactly why I'm doing it. .10 ::DOING :=Jessie: garden was this summer or what they're doing for Thanksgiving or how their chil .01 ::DOLLARS :=Mama: somebody with a flea market for forty dollars. .03 ::DOLLARS :=Jessie: on cigarettes until it gets to fifteen dollars. .03 ::DOLLARS' :=Jessie: they won't deliver less than fifteen dollars' worth. What I do is tell them what .01 ::DON'T :=Jessie: Don't worry. It's not for him, it's for .01 ::DON'T :=Jessie: Towels you don't want anymore. How about this swimming .01 ::DON'T :=Jessie: Then wash your hands and don't talk to me any more about Ricky. Those .01 ::DON'T :=Mama: Don't go making a big mess, Jessie. It's .01 ::DON'T :=Mama: Don't make jokes, Jessie. I'm too old for .01 ::DON'T :=Mama: I don't like the idea of a gun, Jess. .01 ::DON'T :=Mama: You don't mean that. .01 ::DON'T :=Mama: I said don't make a mess. Your hair is black enough, .01 ::DON'T :=Mama: You are not! Don't even say such a thing, Jessie. .01 ::DON'T :=Mama: And I told you, we don't get criminals out here. .01 ::DON'T :=Mama: It's plenty safe! As long as you don't go up there. .01 ::DON'T :=Mama: I'm not trying to help, sugar. We don't have anything anybody'd want, Jessie. .01 ::DON'T :=Mama: anybody'd want, Jessie. I mean, I don't even want what we got, Jessie. .01 ::DON'T :=Mama: felt like shooting somebody, but we don't do it. I just don't think we need. .01 ::DON'T :=Mama: somebody, but we don't do it. I just don't think we need... .02 ::DON'T :=Jessie: I don't want anybody else over here. Just you .02 ::DON'T :=Jessie: So quiet I don't know it's quiet. So nobody can get .02 ::DON'T :=Mama: You don't know what dead is like. It might not .02 ::DON'T :=Mama: Your birthday's coming up, Jessie. Don't you want to know what we got you? .02 ::DON'T :=Mama: Jessie. You're not even upset! People don't really kill themselves, Jessie. No, .03 ::DON'T :=Jessie: No, I don't. That's what I like about it. .03 ::DON'T :=Jessie: I just don't like their talk. The account at the .03 ::DON'T :=Jessie: I read the paper. I don't like how things are. And they're not .03 ::DON'T :=Jessie: You do something else. You don't just wait. .03 ::DON'T :=Jessie: were there when it happened and it don't belong to them, it belongs to you, .03 ::DON'T :=Jessie: just call Dawson and sit tight. But don't open the refrigerator door. Things .03 ::DON'T :=Jessie: and the only reason in the world you don't get off is it's still fifty blocks .03 ::DON'T :=Jessie: just not having a very good time and I don't have any reason to think it'll get .03 ::DON'T :=Jessie: tray every time you use the dryer. But don't ever put your house shoes in, it'll .03 ::DON'T :=Mama: I don't do it as well as you. I just meant .03 ::DON'T :=Mama: You don't have to. .03 ::DON'T :=Mama: You don't like it here. .03 ::DON'T :=Mama: Good time don't come looking for you, Jessie. You could .03 ::DON'T :=Mama: Your eyes don't look right. I thought so yesterday .03 ::DON'T :=Mama: It's nothing personal, hon. They don't mean to get on your nerves. They don't .03 ::DON'T :=Mama: her at home when he comes. And we don't ever have to see Dawson either if he .03 ::DON'T :=Mama: mad and everybody's boring and you don't have anything to do and you don't like .03 ::DON'T :=Mama: to do and you don't like me and you don't like going out and you don't like staying .03 ::DON'T :=Mama: you never talk on the phone and you don't watch TV and you're miserable and it's .03 ::DON'T :=Mama: and you don't like going out and you don't like staying in and you never talk .03 ::DON'T :=Mama: this house if you don't want to. You don't have to take care of me, Jessie. .03 ::DON'T :=Mama: I get through. You just watch me. You don't have to do another thing in this house .03 ::DON'T :=Mama: do another thing in this house if you don't want to. You don't have to take care .03 ::DON'T :=Mama: you don't have anything to do and you don't like me and you don't like going out .03 ::DON'T :=Mama: don't mean to get on your nerves. They don't even mean to be your family, they just .04 ::DON'T :=Jessie: Except you don't like milk. .04 ::DON'T :=Mama: I don't know how much okra the average person .04 ::DON'T :=Mama: Or used to. And you don't get cocoa like mine anywhere anymo .04 ::DON'T :=Mama: I hate those birds. She says I don't understand them. What's there to understand .04 ::DON'T :=Mama: Well, we all like a change of scene, don't we? .04 ::DON'T :=Mama: if it wasn't the truth, Jessie. Things don't have to be true to talk about 'em, .05 ::DON'T :=Jessie: Don't do that! I just straightened that .05 ::DON'T :=Jessie: I don't know, Mama! His life, I guess. His .05 ::DON'T :=Jessie: I don't know. I liked him better than you did, .05 ::DON'T :=Mama: I don't like carrots. .05 ::DON'T :=Mama: I don't like things to think about. I like .05 ::DON'T :=Mama: No, I don't know, Jessie! You had those quiet little .05 ::DON'T :=Mama: know what I'm here for, but then I don't think about it. But I bet you wouldn't .05 ::DON'T :=Mama: He felt sorry for you, too, Jessie, don't kid yourself about that. He said you .05 ::DON'T :=Mama: It's a real waste of chocolate. You don't have to finish it. .05 ::DON'T :=Mama: not here for yours either, Jessie. I don't know what I'm here for, but then I .05 ::DON'T :=Mama: you get me a new babysitter? Well, I don't want to live with Agnes. I barely want .05 ::DON'T :=Mama: not letting Agnes near this place. You don't get off as easy as that, child. .05 ::DON'T :=Mama: said you would do whatever I wanted! I don't want a bunch of pans cluttering up .06 ::DON'T :=Mama: Why do you read the newspaper? Why don't you wear that sweater I made for you? .07 ::DON'T :=Jessie: Mama, you don't pack your garbage when you move. .07 ::DON'T :=Jessie: always, inside that boy, and if you don't see it, then you're just blind. .07 ::DON'T :=Jessie: I'd just like to look at you, if you don't mind? No. He loved me, Mama. He just .07 ::DON'T :=Mama: Ricky isn't through yet. You don't know how he'll turn out! .08 ::DON'T :=Jessie: I don't like this. I don't like this one b .08 ::DON'T :=Jessie: I don't think you want this manicure we've .08 ::DON'T :=Jessie: I don't like this. I don't like this one bit. .08 ::DON'T :=Jessie: Or you. I bite you, too, don't I? .08 ::DON'T :=Jessie: this drawer. They'll get lost if you don't, and rubber bands or something else .08 ::DON'T :=Jessie: can. The Davis's dogs get in it if you don't. And keep ordering the heavy black .08 ::DON'T :=Mama: Don't leave me, Jessie! No! .08 ::DON'T :=Mama: I don't know. Because of how I felt about your .08 ::DON'T :=Mama: I don't want a manicure! .08 ::DON'T :=Mama: Maybe I did drop you, you don't know. .08 ::DON'T :=Mama: blackouts where maybe their eyes don't even close and people just call them .08 ::DON'T :=Mama: Or maybe he thought I beat you. I don't know what he thought. He didn't think .08 ::DON'T :=Mama: slide down the wall, you know. You don't know what happens? How can you not .08 ::DON'T :=Mama: tongue out of the way fast, so you don't bite yourself. .08 ::DON'T :=Mama: This is all my fault, Jessie, but I don't know what to do about it now! .08 ::DON'T :=Mama: from you or all of it put together. I don't know what I did, but I did it, I know. .08 ::DON'T :=Mama: it was. The magazine said some people don't even know they've had one. .08 ::DON'T :=Mama: me, if you want to. I can take it. You don't have to act like you're just visiting .09 ::DON'T :=Jessie: Don't you see, Mama, everything I do winds .09 ::DON'T :=Jessie: You don't know when. Like in a scary movie. .09 ::DON'T :=Jessie: For whatever happens, I don't know. For the rest of your life. For .09 ::DON'T :=Mama: to protect myself anyhow when I don't know what he looks like and I don't .09 ::DON'T :=Mama: longer. Just a few more years. I don't have that many more to go, Jessie. .09 ::DON'T :=Mama: quiet and I don't want to die and I don't want you to go, Jessie. How can I -- .09 ::DON'T :=Mama: you, Jessie. I hate the quiet and I don't want to die and I don't want you to .09 ::DON'T :=Mama: I don't know what he looks like and I don't know how he sounds coming up behind .09 ::DON'T :=Mama: You can get brave and try some more . You don't have to give up! .09 ::DON'T :=Mama: will hurt or take very long or what I don't get done before it happens. .10 ::DON'T :=Jessie: Don't try and stop me, Mama, you can't do .10 ::DON'T :=Jessie: I don't want you to wake Dawson and Loretta .10 ::DON'T :=Jessie: Now, when you hear the shot, I don't want you to come in. First of all, .10 ::DON'T :=Jessie: is private, yours and mine, and I don't want anybody else to have any of i .10 ::DON'T :=Jessie: all and have some left for you. But don't let anybody take anything home, especially .10 ::DON'T :=Jessie: Or if you want to be surprised, just don't read that page. This Christmas, you're .10 ::DON'T :=Jessie: be able to get in by yourself, but I don't want you trying. Call Dawson, then .10 ::DON'T :=Jessie: me. Be funny for her to have it now, don't you think? And all my house slippers .10 ::DON'T :=Jessie: till you hear the doorbell ring and I don't care if it's an hour, you keep washing .10 ::DON'T :=Jessie: you why I did it and you just say you don't know. That you loved me and you know .10 ::DON'T :=Mama: I don't remember, hon. .10 ::DON'T :=Mama: I don't think I should ask about their children. .10 ::DON'T :=Mama: Jessie. Jessie! Jessie! What if I don't do any of the things you told me to .10 ::DON'T :=Mama: Jessie! Jessie, you let me in there. Don't you do this, Jessie. I'm not going .10 ::DON'T :=Mama: lot of things to take care of here. I don't know where my prescriptions are and .10 ::DON'T :=Mama: up fast, Jessie, if they have to. They don't matter here, Jessie. You do. I do. .05 ::DONE :=Jessie: day when Agnes is out getting her hair done, you could take them all for a walk .05 ::DONE :=Mama: Then what would you have done? .06 ::DONE :=Jessie: room was let me wake up. I could've done that here. Now, I'll just call them .08 ::DONE :=Mama: a freak, is that what I should have done? .09 ::DONE :=Jessie: you have to. It's what you've always done. .09 ::DONE :=Mama: or take very long or what I don't get done before it happens. .01 ::DOOR :=Jessie: started in on other people, door to door. I hope they put him away sometime. .01 ::DOOR :=Jessie: now he's started in on other people, door to door. I hope they put him away sometime. .01 ::DOOR :=Mama: put a big mirror on the refrigerator door. That'll keep him out of my treats, .02 ::DOOR :=Jessie: just walk in the bedroom and lock the door. Dawson will get here just in time to .02 ::DOOR :=Jessie: have to go in the bedroom and lock the door behind me so they won't arrest you for .03 ::DOOR :=Jessie: that Susie will take your fudge next door to the grocery and it'll all come out .03 ::DOOR :=Jessie: cool in there as long as you keep the door shut. .03 ::DOOR :=Jessie: tight. But don't open the refrigerator door. Things will stay cool in there as long .10 ::DOOR :=Jessie: and you heard me close my bedroom door and the next thing you heard was the .10 ::DOOR :=Jessie: of toothpaste I found hanging on the door one day. .10 ::DOOR :=Mama: to stop screaming until you open this door, Jessie. Jessie! Jessie! What if I don't .10 ::DOORBELL :=Jessie: You wash that pan till you hear the doorbell ring and I don't care if it's an .10 ::DOPE :=Jessie: Well, then, I hope he gets some good dope with it, Mama. And the rest of this .10 ::DOPE :=Mama: He'll buy dope with it! .08 ::DOUBLE :=Jessie: sure am feeling good. I really am. The double vision's gone and my gums aren't swelling. .01 ::DOWN :=Jessie: your teeth and you hear this -- noise down the hall? .01 ::DOWN :=Mama: You come down from there before you have a fit. I .01 ::DOWN :=Mama: I shoulda got you to bring down that milk can. Agnes Fletcher sold hers .03 ::DOWN :=Jessie: it work. But I can stop it. Shut it down, turn it off like the radio when there's .03 ::DOWN :=Jessie: then, it's the same place when I step down to it. Whenever I feel like it, I can .03 ::DOWN :=Mama: to me, didn't you? Did you write this down? How long have you been thinking about .04 ::DOWN :=Jessie: She wouldn't burn her house down now. Where would she go? She can't get .04 ::DOWN :=Mama: I'm serious! Agnes Fletcher's burned down every house she ever lived in. Eight .04 ::DOWN :=Mama: in, you knew they were going to fall down anyway, so why wait for it, is all I .05 ::DOWN :=Jessie: them, they'll be here. You'll bend down and get them, like you got the one for .05 ::DOWN :=Mama: cluttering up my cabinets I can't get down to, anyway. Throw them out. Every last .06 ::DOWN :=Mama: who only sees the driveway looking down from a stretcher passed out cold? .07 ::DOWN :=Jessie: He just didn't know how things fall down around me like they do. I think he did .08 ::DOWN :=Jessie: My head turns around and I fall down and then what? .08 ::DOWN :=Jessie: Just get the manicure tray and sit down! .08 ::DOWN :=Jessie: as a kid and you just told me I fell down or something and it wasn't till I had .08 ::DOWN :=Mama: Your mouth bites down and I have to get your tongue out of .08 ::DOWN :=Mama: He thought you were -- you fell down a lot. That's what he thought. You were .08 ::DOWN :=Mama: that's all. And then the jerks slow down and you wet yourself and it's over. .08 ::DOWN :=Mama: you those fits, Jessie. He passed it down to you like your green eyes and your .08 ::DOWN :=Mama: in some Mexican movie, you just slide down the wall, you know. You don't know what .08 ::DOWN :=Mama: You did! You were eating a popsicle and down you went. He gave it to you. It's his .09 ::DOWN :=Jessie: rest of your life. For Agnes burning down one more house or Dawson losing his .10 ::DOWN :=Mama: get past me. You'll have to knock me down to get away from me, Jessie. I'm not .04 ::DOWNRIGHT :=Mama: throat as bad as okra. Something just downright disgusting about it. .07 ::DOWNTOWN :=Mama: honey, that happens sometimes. Go downtown. Find him. Talk to him. He didn't .10 ::DR :=Mama: and you didn't tell me what to tell Dr. Davis when he calls or how much you want .09 ::DRAG :=Mama: here until they make me go, until they drag me screaming and I mean screeching into .04 ::DRAGGING :=Jessie: come over here. If I have to keep dragging the truth out of you, this is going .05 ::DRAGS :=Mama: sitting in the mud, he comes along, drags me in the kitchen, "She's been there .03 ::DRAWER :=Jessie: Now, this drawer has everything in it that there's .05 ::DRAWER :=Jessie: Don't do that! I just straightened that drawer! .06 ::DRAWER :=Jessie: They're in the bottom drawer of your dresser in an old Milk of .08 ::DRAWER :=Jessie: open a new one and put them in this drawer. They'll get lost if you don't, and .09 ::DRESS :=Mama: and say how nice I look in my pink dress, and drink my milk. You're supposed .10 ::DRESS :=Jessie: exactly which ones. Oh, and I had your dress cleaned that you wore to Daddy's. You .01 ::DRESS-UP :=Mama: invite you out for supper someplace dress-up. .10 ::DRESSED :=Jessie: call. I want them to still be up and dressed so they can get right over. .06 ::DRESSER :=Jessie: They're in the bottom drawer of your dresser in an old Milk of Magnesia box. Cecil .03 ::DRINK :=Mama: fits or your hair falling out or you drink too much coffee or you never go out .06 ::DRINK :=Jessie: You should drink milk. .06 ::DRINK :=Jessie: Are you going to drink ketchup from the bottle or what? How .06 ::DRINK :=Jessie: run out of Cokes and you'd have to drink it. I told them I knew you wouldn't .09 ::DRINK :=Mama: how nice I look in my pink dress, and drink my milk. You're supposed to go around .05 ::DRIVE :=Mama: tobacco and all he ever did was drive out to the lake and sit in his car. .02 ::DRIVER :=Mama: about the ambulance. You like the one driver, I know. What's his name, Timmy? Get .03 ::DRIVER'S :=Mama: maybe the doctor would let you get a driver's license now, or I know what let's .04 ::DRIVEWAY :=Mama: but I ain't comin'. I'll come up the driveway, but that's as far as I go." .06 ::DRIVEWAY :=Mama: front steps? You, who only sees the driveway looking down from a stretcher passed .09 ::DROOLED :=Jessie: nearly every day, and rolled over and drooled on the sheet and felt your hand pulling .08 ::DROP :=Mama: Maybe I did drop you, you don't know. .02 ::DROPPED :=Mama: He broke it right before he died. He dropped it in the mud one day. .01 ::DRY :=Jessie: I'll be right back. And get 'em real dry. You dry your hands till I get back or .01 ::DRY :=Jessie: right back. And get 'em real dry. You dry your hands till I get back or it's no .08 ::DRY :=Jessie: Next time you wash this cover, it'll dry better if you put it on wet. .03 ::DRYER :=Jessie: the lint tray every time you use the dryer. But don't ever put your house shoes .04 ::DUE :=Mama: ever lived in. Eight fire, and she's due for a new one any day now. .03 ::DUMB :=Jessie: That makes him dumb, not you. .03 ::DUMB :=Mama: I'm so dumb. He's the one run under the tractor .06 ::DUMB :=Mama: Jessie, I know he wasn't that dumb. .03 ::DURING :=Jessie: you wouldn't get such a glare on it during the day. I'll do whatever you want .10 ::DURING :=Mama: When did you do all this? During my naps, I guess. .01 ::DUST :=Jessie: has to be clean, Mama. Old powder, dust gets in it... .02 ::DUSTING :=Jessie: You got me dusting powder, Loretta got me a new housecoat, .07 ::EACH :=Jessie: too small a space. And we're tearing each other apart, like always, inside that .08 ::EACH :=Mama: Different each time, Jess. .02 ::EAR :=Mama: How would you like that? Shoot your ear off? You know what the doctor said about .02 ::EARS :=Mama: Close your eyes. Stuff cotton in your ears. Take a nap! It's quiet in your room. .06 ::EARTHLY :=Jessie: You have no earthly idea how I feel. .05 ::EASY :=Mama: near this place. You don't get off as easy as that, child. .05 ::EASY :=Mama: me about Agnes. You think you can rest easy if you get me a new babysitter? Well, .08 ::EASY :=Jessie: it, but if the TV's on, well, it's easy to miss. .09 ::EASY :=Jessie: me. And hope. I say no! Just let me go easy, Mama. .04 ::EAT :=Mama: You didn't eat a bite of supper. .04 ::EAT :=Mama: she eats. You can't just willy-nilly eat okra two meals a day and expect to get .05 ::EAT :=Mama: in sacks. And tuna. I like tuna. I'll eat tuna, thank you. .08 ::EAT :=Mama: Because I smoked too much or didn't eat right when I was carrying you. It has .06 ::EATING :=Mama: be just like the cocoa. You never like eating at all, did you? Any of it! What have .08 ::EATING :=Mama: You did! You were eating a popsicle and down you went. He gave .04 ::EATS :=Jessie: She really eats okra twice a day? Where does she get .04 ::EATS :=Jessie: Do you know how much okra Agnes eats? .04 ::EATS :=Jessie: birds she has and how much okra she eats and why she won't come over here. If .04 ::EATS :=Mama: Well, she eats it a lot. Maybe not two meals, but. .04 ::EATS :=Mama: know how much okra the average person eats. .04 ::EATS :=Mama: stupid things. It's all that okra she eats. You can't just willy-nilly eat okra .06 ::EGG :=Jessie: and he leaves the order blanks in an egg box, and you give the bills to Dawson .01 ::EIGHT :=Mama: go making a big mess, Jessie. It's eight o'clock already. .04 ::EIGHT :=Mama: down every house she ever lived in. Eight fire, and she's due for a new one any .08 ::EIGHTY :=Mama: had kept track of hers and she'd had eighty thousand of them in the last eleven .02 ::EITHER :=Mama: And you can't use your father's gun, either. It's mine now, too. And you can't .03 ::EITHER :=Jessie: No. You can't. And I can't do anything either, about my life, to change it, make .03 ::EITHER :=Mama: And we don't ever have to see Dawson either if he bothers you. Does he bother .05 ::EITHER :=Mama: and I'm not here for yours either, Jessie. I don't know what I'm here .06 ::EITHER :=Mama: You won't like the apple, either. It'll be just like the cocoa. You .05 ::ELEPHANTS :=Jessie: and leave me a chain of sleepy stick elephants on my bed in the morning. .08 ::ELEVEN :=Mama: eighty thousand of them in the last eleven years. .03 ::ELMER'S :=Jessie: lighters, sandpaper, masking tape, Elmer's glue, thumbtacks, that kind of stuff. .02 ::ELSE :=Jessie: I don't want anybody else over here. Just you and me. If Dawson .03 ::ELSE :=Jessie: You do something else. You don't just wait. .03 ::ELSE :=Jessie: always thought if the TV was somewhere else, you wouldn't get such a glare on it .03 ::ELSE :=Mama: Whatever else you find to do, you're still mainly .03 ::ELSE :=Mama: The waiting's what you pay somebody else to do, if you can. .04 ::ELSE :=Jessie: What else? Why does she wear all those whistles .05 ::ELSE :=Jessie: the one for the cocoa. And if somebody else comes over here to cook, they'll have .08 ::ELSE :=Jessie: don't, and rubber bands or something else won't work. .09 ::ELSE :=Jessie: picture of me. And it was somebody else, not me. It was somebody pink and fat .09 ::ELSE :=Jessie: So, see, it doesn't much matter what else happens in the world or in this house, .10 ::ELSE :=Jessie: and mine, and I don't want anybody else to have any of it. .06 ::EMERGENCY :=Jessie: for me. All they did for me in the emergency room was let me wake up. I could've .05 ::END :=Jessie: something to cook in, and that's the end of it! .06 ::END :=Mama: of yours will still be standing at the end of the world, Jessie. .07 ::ENDED :=Jessie: he said it had to last, and the thing ended up weighing two hundred pounds and .01 ::ENOUGH :=Jessie: Waited until I felt good enough, in fact. .01 ::ENOUGH :=Jessie: Garbage bags would do if there's enough. .01 ::ENOUGH :=Mama: Well, you didn't look good enough, then. There's that box from the ones .01 ::ENOUGH :=Mama: don't make a mess. Your hair is black enough, hon. .03 ::ENOUGH :=Jessie: sales job and I didn't even make enough money to pay the phone bill, and I .03 ::ENOUGH :=Jessie: had enough, it's my stop. I've had enough. .03 ::ENOUGH :=Jessie: it, I can get off. As soon as I've had enough, it's my stop. I've had enough. .03 ::ENOUGH :=Mama: Not good enough. What things? .04 ::ENOUGH :=Mama: she says, "and I'm gonna be one soon enough as it is." .05 ::ENOUGH :=Mama: Not enough, though, does it? You can still taste .05 ::ENOUGH :=Mama: got his share, though. You loved him enough for both of us. You followed him around .06 ::ENOUGH :=Mama: I never thought he was good enough for you. They moved here from Tennessee, .06 ::ENOUGH :=Mama: Nothing I ever did was good enough for you and I want to know why. .07 ::ENOUGH :=Jessie: But maybe he thought if it was strong enough, it might keep Ricky a baby. .07 ::ENOUGH :=Mama: living out here? I didn't know enough to do half the things I did in my .08 ::ENOUGH :=Jessie: if you are all I have and you're not enough? What if I could take all the rest .08 ::ENOUGH :=Mama: sometime and I didn't know it soon enough. Maybe it's a punishment. .09 ::ENOUGH :=Jessie: breakfast or something, that might be enough. .09 ::ENOUGH :=Jessie: that might work, but might work isn't good enough anymore. I need something that .09 ::ENOUGH :=Jessie: you company, and that's -- not reason enough because I'm not -- very good company. .10 ::ENOUGH :=Jessie: And be sure to invite enough people home afterward so you get enough .10 ::ENOUGH :=Jessie: people home afterward so you get enough food to feed them all and have some .05 ::ENTERTAINMENT :=Mama: said to? Well I wasn't here for his entertainment and I'm not here for yours .03 ::EPILEPSY :=Mama: Epilepsy is sick, Jessie. .08 ::EPILEPSY :=Jessie: It's just a sickness, not a curse. Epilepsy doesn't mean anything. It just .09 ::EPILEPSY :=Jessie: and Loretta and the Red Chinese and epilepsy and Ricky and Cecil and you. And .08 ::EPILEPTIC :=Jessie: If I'd known I was an epileptic, Mama, I wouldn't have ridden any .10 ::ESPECIALLY :=Jessie: don't let anybody take anything home, especially Loretta. .01 ::EVEN :=Jessie: a wagon wheel up there, too. There's even a churn. I'll get it all if you wan .01 ::EVEN :=Mama: You are not! Don't even say such a thing, Jessie. .01 ::EVEN :=Mama: want, Jessie. I mean, I don't even want what we got, Jessie. .02 ::EVEN :=Mama: to kill yourself, Jessie. You're not even upset! People don't really kill themselves, .03 ::EVEN :=Jessie: hurt me, I've hurt him. We're about even. .03 ::EVEN :=Jessie: off right now if I want to, because even if I ride fifty more years and get off .03 ::EVEN :=Jessie: that telephone sales job and I didn't even make enough money to pay the phone bill, .03 ::EVEN :=Mama: mean to get on your nerves. They don't even mean to be your family, they just a .04 ::EVEN :=Mama: might get a laugh out of you for once even if it wasn't the truth, Jessie. Things .06 ::EVEN :=Jessie: here to build your porch or I'd never even met him at all. You thought maybe he'd .07 ::EVEN :=Jessie: it's possible for any human to be. We even wear the same size pants. These are .07 ::EVEN :=Jessie: us is Ricky's out there trying to get even . And he knows not to trust anybody .08 ::EVEN :=Jessie: Most of the time I wouldn't even know I'd had one, except I wake up with .08 ::EVEN :=Jessie: a list of all the birthdays for you. I even put yours on it. So you can call Loretta .08 ::EVEN :=Jessie: as good as I ever felt in my life. I'm even feeling like worrying or getting mad .08 ::EVEN :=Mama: Of course you do! You can even scream at me, if you want to. I can .08 ::EVEN :=Mama: The magazine said some people don't even know they've had one. .08 ::EVEN :=Mama: But, Jessie, and this is the reason I even brought this up! You haven't had a seizure .08 ::EVEN :=Mama: blackouts where maybe their eyes don't even close and people just call them "thinking .09 ::EVEN :=Jessie: happens in the world or in this house, even. I'm what was worth waiting for and .09 ::EVEN :=Mama: I was here all the time and I never even saw it. And then you gave me this chance .10 ::EVEN :=Jessie: lost. Things you didn't know you had, even. You'll see. .10 ::EVEN :=Mama: It's not even ten o'clock. .02 ::EVER :=Jessie: Dead is everybody and everything I ever knew, gone. Dead is dead quiet. .02 ::EVER :=Mama: wake up so you can't shut it off. Ever. .03 ::EVER :=Jessie: But nobody ever checked them. .03 ::EVER :=Jessie: time you use the dryer. But don't ever put your house shoes in, it'll melt .03 ::EVER :=Mama: Loretta doesn't ever have to come over here again. Dawson .03 ::EVER :=Mama: somewhere. They're none of them ever setting foot in this house again. .03 ::EVER :=Mama: at home when he comes. And we don't ever have to see Dawson either if he bothers .04 ::EVER :=Jessie: That you could ever tell, you mean. You didn't have to lie .04 ::EVER :=Jessie: You guess what? What's she ever said? She must've given you some re .04 ::EVER :=Mama: 'Cause nobody ever got hurt, I guess. Agnes woke everybody .04 ::EVER :=Mama: and come visit. I didn't know you ever thought about her at all. I'll tell .04 ::EVER :=Mama: so why wait for it, is all I could ever make out about it. Agnes like a feeling .04 ::EVER :=Mama: not that much to things that I could ever see. .04 ::EVER :=Mama: Fletcher's burned down every house she ever lived in. Eight fire, and she's due .05 ::EVER :=Jessie: You didn't ever love him, or he did something and you .05 ::EVER :=Mama: like some -- Jessie, all the man ever did was farm and sit -- and try to think .05 ::EVER :=Mama: me in the kitchen, "She's been there ever since."? .05 ::EVER :=Mama: was full of chewing tobacco and all he ever did was drive out to the lake and sit .06 ::EVER :=Mama: Nothing I ever did was good enough for you and I want .06 ::EVER :=Mama: He's the best carpenter I ever saw. That little house of yours will .08 ::EVER :=Jessie: I won't be here. If I'd ever had a year like this, to think straight .08 ::EVER :=Jessie: or anything. I'm feeling as good as I ever felt in my life. I'm even feeling like .08 ::EVER :=Mama: is. You might never have another one, ever! You might be through with it for all .09 ::EVER :=Mama: this will really confuse them. Oh yes, ever since Christmas you've been laughing .01 ::EVERY :=Jessie: Every word. Wash your hands and that's the .02 ::EVERY :=Mama: We're just going to sit around like every other night in the world and then you're .03 ::EVERY :=Jessie: Be sure you clean out the lint tray every time you use the dryer. But don't ever .04 ::EVERY :=Mama: serious! Agnes Fletcher's burned down every house she ever lived in. Eight fire, .05 ::EVERY :=Mama: little conversations after supper every night. What were you whispering ab .05 ::EVERY :=Mama: get down to, anyway. Throw them out. Every last one. .08 ::EVERY :=Mama: let you out of my sight. I caught you every time. .09 ::EVERY :=Jessie: woke up knowing some new trick nearly every day, and rolled over and drooled on .09 ::EVERY :=Mama: the coffee and watching me get older every day, and you're supposed to help me .09 ::EVERY :=Mama: Jessie. How can I -- How can I get up every day knowing you had to kill yourself .10 ::EVERY :=Jessie: of them home with Loretta counting every penny the way she does, so he gave .10 ::EVERY :=Jessie: and we just sat around tonight like every other night of our lives, and then .02 ::EVERYBODY :=Jessie: Dead is everybody and everything I ever knew, gone. .04 ::EVERYBODY :=Mama: ever got hurt, I guess. Agnes woke everybody up to watch the fires as soon as .10 ::EVERYBODY :=Jessie: so much, but I wish he knew not everybody has her size feet. .02 ::EVERYBODY'S :=Jessie: See? Everybody's doing what they can. .03 ::EVERYBODY'S :=Mama: little brat, Jessie. You're mad and everybody's boring and you don't have anything .06 ::EVERYBODY'S :=Jessie: want to go, and they said, "Yeah, everybody's got their own idea of vacati .04 ::EVERYDAY :=Mama: How is she everyday, Jessie? Nuts. .02 ::EVERYTHING :=Jessie: Dead is everybody and everything I ever knew, gone. Dead is dead .03 ::EVERYTHING :=Jessie: Oh, everything from you and me to Red China. .03 ::EVERYTHING :=Jessie: Now, this drawer has everything in it that there's no better place .04 ::EVERYTHING :=Jessie: Trouble and everything. .04 ::EVERYTHING :=Jessie: burns up? Her clothes and pillows and everything? I'm not sure I believe this. .07 ::EVERYTHING :=Jessie: him I would leave Ricky and you and everything I loved out here if only he would .08 ::EVERYTHING :=Jessie: Because I've made lists for everything. But now I remember what things .08 ::EVERYTHING :=Jessie: Then what if it does! What if it has everything to do with you! What if you are .08 ::EVERYTHING :=Mama: Everything you do has to do with me, Jessie. .09 ::EVERYTHING :=Jessie: Don't you see, Mama, everything I do winds up like th is. How .09 ::EVERYTHING :=Mama: happen. Something that could change everything. Who knows what it might be, but .10 ::EVERYTHING :=Jessie: Let go of me, Mama. I've said everything I had to say. .01 ::EXACTLY :=Jessie: thing falls in on you. Six inches exactly. .02 ::EXACTLY :=Jessie: It's exactly what I want. It's dark and quiet .03 ::EXACTLY :=Jessie: Exactly. .04 ::EXACTLY :=Jessie: What is it exactly? Did I say something, sometime? Or .09 ::EXACTLY :=Jessie: sorry about tonight, Mama, but it's exactly why I'm doing it. .10 ::EXACTLY :=Jessie: like or let Agnes pick, she'll know exactly which ones. Oh, and I had your dress .01 ::EXCEPT :=Jessie: Except for Ricky. .03 ::EXCEPT :=Jessie: this morning and canceled the papers, except for Sunday, for your puzzles; you'll .03 ::EXCEPT :=Jessie: never been around people by whole life except when I went to the hospital. I could .04 ::EXCEPT :=Jessie: Except you don't like milk. .06 ::EXCEPT :=Jessie: They didn't bother him at all. Except he did feel responsible for it. It .08 ::EXCEPT :=Jessie: time I wouldn't even know I'd had one, except I wake up with different clothes on, .09 ::EXCEPT :=Jessie: show up, so there's no reason to stay, except to keep you company, and that's -- .02 ::EXCITED :=Mama: what the doctor said about getting excited. You'll cock the pistol and have .04 ::EXCITING :=Mama: Be exciting, though, if she did. You never .07 ::EXERCISE :=Jessie: Cecil so much. And I tried to get more exercise and I tried to stay awake. I tried .04 ::EXPECT :=Mama: eat okra two meals a day and expect to get away with it. Made her cra .05 ::EXPECTED :=Jessie: I wouldn't have expected him to. .09 ::EXPLAIN :=Jessie: I only told you so I could explain it, so you wouldn't blame yourself, .03 ::EXTENSION :=Jessie: it that there's no better place for. Extension cords, batteries for the radio, .03 ::EXTRA :=Jessie: There's extra light bulbs in a box in the hall closet. .03 ::EXTRA :=Jessie: cords, batteries for the radio, extra lighters, sandpaper, masking tape, .02 ::EYES :=Mama: So is the back yard, Jessie! Close your eyes. Stuff cotton in your ears. Take a nap! .03 ::EYES :=Mama: Your eyes don't look right. I thought so yest .08 ::EYES :=Mama: I watched his eyes. I know that's what it was. The magazine .08 ::EYES :=Mama: little blackouts where maybe their eyes don't even close and people just call .08 ::EYES :=Mama: when you're about to have one. Your eyes get this big! But, Jessie, you have .08 ::EYES :=Mama: passed it down to you like your green eyes and your straight hair. It's not my .09 ::EYES :=Jessie: she wanted to, just by closing her eyes. Somebody who mainly just laid there .07 ::FACE :=Jessie: I see it on his face. I hear it when he talks. We look out .08 ::FACE :=Mama: You can't do anything, wash your face or cut your finger, without doing it .01 ::FACT :=Jessie: Waited until I felt good enough, in fact. .04 ::FACT :=Mama: follow her home. Well, I know for a fact she's still paying on the last parrot .05 ::FADED :=Jessie: I liked him sitting. Big old faded blue man in the chair. Quiet. .07 ::FAILED :=Mama: He had a wife and son here and he failed you. .06 ::FAIR :=Jessie: O.K. That's fair. Was she very pretty? .07 ::FAIR :=Jessie: world and we see the same thing: Not Fair. And the only difference between us .10 ::FAIR :=Mama: all the food set up, honey. It's only fair to let her have some macaroni or so .01 ::FALL :=Mama: falls off. Why does the coconut fall off? .04 ::FALL :=Mama: lived in, you knew they were going to fall down anyway, so why wait for it, is .06 ::FALL :=Mama: do you see stars or what? How did you fall off the horse, really? Why did Cecil .07 ::FALL :=Jessie: Mama. He just didn't know how things fall down around me like they do. I think .08 ::FALL :=Jessie: laughing. My head turns around and I fall down and then what? .03 ::FALLING :=Mama: or Cecil or your fits or your hair falling out or you drink too much coffee .01 ::FALLS :=Jessie: Salvation Army before the whole thing falls in on you. Six inches exactly. .01 ::FALLS :=Mama: me, honey? I hate it when the coconut falls off. Why does the coconut fall off .03 ::FAMILY :=Mama: Family is just accident, Jessie. It's nothing .03 ::FAMILY :=Mama: They don't even mean to be your family, they just are. .05 ::FAMILY :=Mama: for it was -- a whole pipe-cleaner family -- chickens, pigs, a dog with a bad .01 ::FAR :=Mama: a criminal in my life. This is way too far to come for what's out here to steal. .04 ::FAR :=Mama: come up the driveway, but that's as far as I go." .06 ::FAR :=Mama: Well, how could I? You're real far back there, Jessie. .05 ::FARM :=Mama: -- Jessie, all the man ever did was farm and sit -- and try to think of somebody .05 ::FARM :=Mama: try to think of somebody to sell the farm to. .08 ::FAST :=Mama: your finger in a light socket as fast as you can... .08 ::FAST :=Mama: have to get your tongue out of the way fast, so you don't bite yourself. .09 ::FAST :=Mama: about it, he'll change the subject as fast as he can. He'll talk about how much .10 ::FAST :=Mama: They wake up fast, Jessie, if they have to. They don't .05 ::FAT :=Mama: No. It was a big fat lie, the whole thing. He just thought .09 ::FAT :=Jessie: else, not me. It was somebody pink and fat who never heard of sick and lonely, somebody .08 ::FATHER :=Mama: know. Because of how I felt about your father. Because I didn't want any more children. .02 ::FATHER'S :=Mama: And you can't use your father's gun, either. It's mine now, too. .03 ::FAULT :=Mama: miserable and it's your own sweet fault. .08 ::FAULT :=Mama: and your straight hair. It's not my fault! .08 ::FAULT :=Mama: but I did it, I know. This is all my fault, Jessie, but I don't know what to do .08 ::FAULT :=Mama: you went. He gave it to you. It's his fault, not mine. .08 ::FED :=Mama: Maybe I fed you the wrong thing. Maybe you had a .09 ::FED :=Jessie: and lonely, somebody who cried and got fed, and reached up and got held and kicked .02 ::FEED :=Jessie: Feed store Dawson told me about. .10 ::FEED :=Jessie: afterward so you get enough food to feed them all and have some left for you. .01 ::FEEL :=Jessie: Not a thing. Feel fine. .01 ::FEEL :=Mama: You feel fine. You're just going to kill you .02 ::FEEL :=Jessie: If Dawson comes over, it'll make me feel stupid for not doing it ten years a .03 ::FEEL :=Jessie: when I step down to it. Whenever I feel like it, I can get off. As soon as I've .03 ::FEEL :=Jessie: kind of job I could get would make me feel worse. .03 ::FEEL :=Jessie: to change it, make it better, make me feel better about it. Like it better, make .03 ::FEEL :=Jessie: worse. I'm tired. I'm hurt. I'm sad. I feel used. .03 ::FEEL :=Mama: meant if it tires you out or makes you feel used... .05 ::FEEL :=Mama: Fine then. You were right. Do you feel better now? .06 ::FEEL :=Jessie: You have no earthly idea how I feel. .06 ::FEEL :=Jessie: bother him at all. Except he did feel responsible for it. It was his idea .08 ::FEEL :=Jessie: like I've been run over. Sometimes I feel my head start to turn around or hear .08 ::FEEL :=Mama: Make you feel like a freak, is that what I should .09 ::FEEL :=Jessie: blame yourself, so you wouldn't feel bad. There wasn't anything you could .09 ::FEEL :=Mama: No, you can't, Jessie. You make me feel like a fool for being alive, child, .09 ::FEEL :=Mama: right. You know who they're going to feel sorry for? Me! How about that! Not you, .10 ::FEEL :=Jessie: I think he'll feel like a real jerk if he doesn't. Me telling .10 ::FEEL :=Mama: a miserable man he was to make you feel the way he did and I'll give Ricky's .10 ::FEEL :=Mama: I'll give Ricky's watch to Dawson if I feel like it and the only way you can make .03 ::FEELING :=Mama: You're feeling sorry for yourself! .04 ::FEELING :=Mama: ever make out about it. Agnes like a feeling of accomplishment. .06 ::FEELING :=Mama: know why you've lived here this long feeling the way you do. .08 ::FEELING :=Jessie: I sure am feeling good. I really am. The double vision's .08 ::FEELING :=Jessie: as I ever felt in my life. I'm even feeling like worrying or getting mad and .08 ::FEELING :=Jessie: I wake up with different clothes on, feeling like I've been run over. Sometimes .08 ::FEELING :=Jessie: sometimes there is this dizzy stupid feeling a little before it, but if the TV's .08 ::FEELING :=Jessie: swelling. No rashes or anything. I'm feeling as good as I ever felt in my life. .04 ::FEELS :=Mama: thing. When she comes over here, she feels like -- Well, we all like a change .05 ::FEELS :=Jessie: It feels good to be right about it. .10 ::FEET :=Jessie: he knew not everybody has her size feet. .06 ::FELL :=Jessie: if I just made up my mind to. I fell off the horse because I didn't know .08 ::FELL :=Jessie: time as a kid and you just told me I fell down or something and it wasn't till .08 ::FELL :=Jessie: had little fits? It's not inherited. I fell off the horse. It was an accident. .08 ::FELL :=Mama: He thought you were -- you fell down a lot. That's what he thought. .01 ::FELT :=Jessie: Waited until I felt good enough, in fact. .01 ::FELT :=Mama: your own boy, Jessie. I know you've felt like it, well, we've all felt like shooting .01 ::FELT :=Mama: you've felt like it, well, we've all felt like shooting somebody, but we don't .05 ::FELT :=Mama: He felt sorry for me. He wanted a plain country .05 ::FELT :=Mama: He felt sorry for you, too, Jessie, don't kid .07 ::FELT :=Jessie: love me, not Cecil. But that's how he felt. .08 ::FELT :=Jessie: Yeah. It felt like it might be. What's next? .08 ::FELT :=Jessie: I'm feeling as good as I ever felt in my life. I'm even feeling like worrying .08 ::FELT :=Mama: I don't know. Because of how I felt about your father. Because I didn't .09 ::FELT :=Jessie: over and drooled on the sheet and felt your hand pulling my quilt back up over .08 ::FEVER :=Mama: you the wrong thing. Maybe you had a fever sometime and I didn't know it soon .09 ::FEW :=Mama: with me just a little longer. Just a few more years. I don't have that many more .10 ::FEW :=Jessie: Agnes could come stay with you for a few days. .02 ::FIFTEEN :=Mama: Those bullets are at least fifteen years old. .03 ::FIFTEEN :=Jessie: ten. And they won't deliver less than fifteen dollars' worth. What I do is tell .03 ::FIFTEEN :=Jessie: to add on cigarettes until it gets to fifteen dollars. .05 ::FIFTEEN :=Jessie: I didn't think so. Were you really fifteen when you married him? .08 ::FIFTEEN :=Mama: fits a day and they lasted maybe fifteen seconds apiece, so that out of her .03 ::FIFTY :=Jessie: if I want to, because even if I ride fifty more years and get off then, it's the .03 ::FIFTY :=Jessie: world you don't get off is it's still fifty blocks from where you're going? Well, .02 ::FIGHTING :=Jessie: There's just no point in fighting me over it, that's all. Want some .05 ::FIGURE :=Mama: still alive. That's a fine thing to figure out, isn't it? .05 ::FIGURE :=Mama: was something to it, but I never did figure that one out. What did that mean? .03 ::FILL :=Mama: You do too much for me. I can fill pill bottles all day, Jessie, and change .04 ::FILLED :=Mama: she bought. You gotta keep your life filled up, she says. She says a lot of stupid .10 ::FILLED :=Jessie: Well, then, tell them what we did. I filled up the candy jars. I cleaned out the .01 ::FIND :=Jessie: I looked your whole nap and couldn't find it anywhere. .02 ::FIND :=Jessie: in there, just in case I couldn't find this one, but I'd rather use Daddy' .03 ::FIND :=Mama: I could find it. .03 ::FIND :=Mama: Whatever else you find to do, you're still mainly waiting. .07 ::FIND :=Mama: that happens sometimes. Go downtown. Find him. Talk to him. He didn't know what .08 ::FIND :=Jessie: was looking that anybody bothered to find out what was the matter with me? .09 ::FIND :=Mama: isn't something that would help. You find it. You think of it. You can keep trying. .10 ::FIND :=Jessie: say about him, but mainly tell him to find Ricky and tell him what I did, and tell .01 ::FINE :=Jessie: Not a thing. Feel fine. .01 ::FINE :=Mama: You feel fine. You're just going to kill yourself .01 ::FINE :=Mama: will grow out of this and be a real fine boy, Jess. But I have to tell you, I .04 ::FINE :=Mama: That's fine with me. I'm not a bit sleepy. .04 ::FINE :=Mama: in the pan and stir it up. All right. Fine. Caramel apples. Cocoa. O.K. .05 ::FINE :=Mama: Fine then. You were right. Do you feel better .05 ::FINE :=Mama: if he were still alive. That's a fine thing to figure out, isn't it? .07 ::FINE :=Jessie: couple of boards would have been just fine, but he used that yellow pine and rubbed .08 ::FINGER :=Mama: anything, wash your face or cut your finger, without doing it to me. That's right! .08 ::FINGER :=Mama: a cattle prod or you're sticking your finger in a light socket as fast as you .05 ::FINISH :=Mama: waste of chocolate. You don't have to finish it. .04 ::FIRE :=Jessie: You lied about setting the fire to all those houses and about how many .04 ::FIRE :=Mama: every house she ever lived in. Eight fire, and she's due for a new one any day .04 ::FIRE :=Mama: phone because she had another little fire problem at home. .04 ::FIRES :=Mama: Agnes woke everybody up to watch the fires as soon as she set 'em. One time she .08 ::FIRING :=Mama: the strings all at once, or like the firing squad in some Mexican movie, you just .01 ::FIRST :=Mama: 'em now or are you making your mess first? We're out of these. Did I say that .08 ::FIRST :=Mama: The horse wasn't the first time, Jessie. You had a fit when you .10 ::FIRST :=Jessie: here. I want the police in the room first, not Dawson, O.K.? .10 ::FIRST :=Jessie: you over that nervous part when the first come in. .10 ::FIRST :=Jessie: penny the way she does, so he gave the first one to me. Be funny for her to have .10 ::FIRST :=Jessie: the shot, I don't want you to come in. First of all, you won't be able to get in .01 ::FISHING :=Mama: for fishing. I told him to take up fishing. .01 ::FISHING :=Mama: boots, too, but he said they were for fishing. I told him to take up fishing. .03 ::FISHING :=Jessie: neck, like Daddy's on the barn. GONE FISHING. .05 ::FISHING :=Mama: He never really went fishing, you know. Never once. His tackle .05 ::FISHING :=Mama: about it. And he'd come back from fishing and all he'd have to show for it .05 ::FISHING :=Mama: two of you. He could've had that GONE FISHING sign around his neck in that chair. .01 ::FIT :=Mama: come down from there before you have a fit. I can't come up and get you, you kn .02 ::FIT :=Mama: You'll cock the pistol and have a fit. .04 ::FIT :=Jessie: sometime? Or did she see me have a fit and's afraid I might have another one .06 ::FIT :=Mama: any old woman now? When you have a fit, do you see stars or what? How did you .06 ::FIT :=Mama: thing. A seizure in the hospital is a fit at home. .08 ::FIT :=Jessie: mad and I'm not afraid it will start a fit if I do, I just go ahead. .08 ::FIT :=Jessie: something and it wasn't till I had the fit when Cecil was looking that anybody bothered .08 ::FIT :=Mama: the first time, Jessie. You had a fit when you were five years old. .10 ::FIT :=Jessie: in my closet. Tell her I know they'll fit and I've never worn any of them, and .03 ::FITS :=Mama: it again. Is it Ricky or Cecil or your fits or your hair falling out or you drink .06 ::FITS :=Jessie: Say seizures, not fits. Seizures. .06 ::FITS :=Mama: Your fits made him sick and you know it. .08 ::FITS :=Jessie: How many fits did I have? .08 ::FITS :=Jessie: It's not the fits! You said it yourself, the medicine .08 ::FITS :=Jessie: It's not the fits, Mama. .08 ::FITS :=Jessie: You want to talk about fits, is that it? .08 ::FITS :=Jessie: So what if he had little fits? It's not inherited. I fell off the .08 ::FITS :=Jessie: You mean to tell me I had fits all the time as a kid and you just told .08 ::FITS :=Jessie: the medicine takes care of the fits. .08 ::FITS :=Jessie: Daddy would've known if he'd had fits, Mama. .08 ::FITS :=Mama: The fits are over! .08 ::FITS :=Mama: I think your daddy had fits, too. I think he sat in his chair and .08 ::FITS :=Mama: I'm not talking about the fits here, Jessie! I'm talking about this .08 ::FITS :=Mama: Your daddy gave you those fits, Jessie. He passed it down to you like .08 ::FITS :=Mama: he sat in his chair and had little fits. I read this a long time ago in a magazine, .08 ::FITS :=Mama: time ago in a magazine, how little fits go, just little blackouts where maybe .08 ::FITS :=Mama: anywhere between five and five hundred fits a day and they lasted maybe fifteen .07 ::FIVE :=Jessie: Oh, he'll have plenty of that. Five years for forgery, ten years for armed .08 ::FIVE :=Mama: lady had anywhere between five and five hundred fits a day and they lasted maybe .08 ::FIVE :=Mama: Jessie. You had a fit when you were five years old. .08 ::FIVE :=Mama: you. This lady had anywhere between five and five hundred fits a day and they .08 ::FIVE-YEAR-OLD :=Mama: How do you tell that to a five-year-old? .03 ::FIX :=Mama: because of the newspapers, I can sure fix that! .07 ::FIX :=Jessie: I said "I'm sorry, Jessie, I can't fix it all for you." I said I'd always love .01 ::FLEA :=Mama: Fletcher sold hers to somebody with a flea market for forty dollars. .01 ::FLETCHER :=Mama: you to bring down that milk can. Agnes Fletcher sold hers to somebody with a flea .04 ::FLETCHER'S :=Mama: I'm serious! Agnes Fletcher's burned down every house she ever .06 ::FLIRTED :=Jessie: You liked him better than I did. You flirted him out here to build your porch .01 ::FLOOR :=Mama: It's not a floor at all, hon, it's a board now and then. .03 ::FLOOR :=Mama: change the shelf paper and wash the floor when I get through. You just watch .07 ::FLOOR :=Jessie: around like there's loose boards in the floor, and you know who laid that floor, .07 ::FLOOR :=Jessie: in the floor, and you know who laid that floor, I did. .08 ::FLOOR :=Jessie: You could just leave me on the floor. .01 ::FLOOR'S :=Jessie: Or maybe he's just being smart. That floor's not very steady. .10 ::FLOWERS :=Jessie: Take them up to see their flowers, they'd like that. And When they .04 ::FLY :=Jessie: What their singing means. How they fly. What they think Agnes is. .01 ::FOAM :=Jessie: about some old pillows anywhere, or a foam cushion out of a yard chair would be .08 ::FOAM :=Mama: It's bubbling, Jess, not foam like the washer overflowed, for God's .08 ::FOAMING :=Jessie: Foaming like a mad dog the whole time. .04 ::FOLLOW :=Mama: Well, she does. And she says they just follow her home. Well, I know for a fact .05 ::FOLLOWED :=Mama: loved him enough for both of us. You followed him around like some -- Jessie, .06 ::FOOD :=Jessie: bottle or what? How can you want your food and not want your pots to cook it in? .10 ::FOOD :=Jessie: home afterward so you get enough food to feed them all and have some left .10 ::FOOD :=Mama: Loretta will get all the food set up, honey. It's only fair to let .09 ::FOOL :=Mama: can't, Jessie. You make me feel like a fool for being alive, child, and you are .03 ::FOOT :=Mama: They're none of them ever setting foot in this house again. .01 ::FOR :=Jessie: Except for Ricky. .01 ::FOR :=Jessie: It's not for my hair, Mama. What about some old pillows .01 ::FOR :=Jessie: Don't worry. It's not for him, it's for me. .01 ::FOR :=Jessie: And I told you -- The gun is for me. .01 ::FOR :=Jessie: Don't worry. It's not for him, it's for me. .01 ::FOR :=Jessie: go in the freezer till you're ready for them. Where's Daddy's gun? .01 ::FOR :=Mama: What for? .01 ::FOR :=Mama: It must be time for your medicine. .01 ::FOR :=Mama: What do you want the gun for, Jess? .01 ::FOR :=Mama: boots, too, but he said they were for fishing. I told him to take up fishi .01 ::FOR :=Mama: a board now and then. Measure this for me. I need six inches. .01 ::FOR :=Mama: get a call and he'll say he's sorry for all the trouble he's caused and invite .01 ::FOR :=Mama: hers to somebody with a flea market for forty dollars. .01 ::FOR :=Mama: my life. This is way too far to come for what's out here to steal. Never seen .01 ::FOR :=Mama: Don't make jokes, Jessie. I'm too old for jokes. .01 ::FOR :=Mama: trouble he's caused and invite you out for supper someplace dress-up. .02 ::FOR :=Jessie: behind me so they won't arrest you for killing me. They'll probably test your .02 ::FOR :=Jessie: bullets and he said he'd just call for me, because he knew they'd send them .02 ::FOR :=Jessie: me. They'll probably test your hands for gunpowder, anyway, but you'll pass. .02 ::FOR :=Jessie: comes over, it'll make me feel stupid for not doing it ten years ago. .02 ::FOR :=Jessie: good idea. He told me what kind to ask for. .02 ::FOR :=Mama: You told me it was for protection! .02 ::FOR :=Mama: You'll go to hell just for saying that, Jessie! .02 ::FOR :=Mama: They're my towels. I've had them for a long time. I like my towels. .02 ::FOR :=Mama: you're as normal as they come, Jessie, for the most part. We're all afraid to d .03 ::FOR :=Jessie: I shopped you up for about two weeks already. You're not going .03 ::FOR :=Jessie: the papers, except for Sunday, for your puzzles; you'll still get that .03 ::FOR :=Jessie: and canceled the papers, except for Sunday, for your puzzles; you'll still .03 ::FOR :=Jessie: in it that there's no better place for. Extension cords, batteries for the radio, .03 ::FOR :=Jessie: place for. Extension cords, batteries for the radio, extra lighters, sandpaper, .03 ::FOR :=Mama: For bringing it up. .03 ::FOR :=Mama: Something for you to take care of. .03 ::FOR :=Mama: You do too much for me. I can fill pill bottles all day, .03 ::FOR :=Mama: You're feeling sorry for yourself! .03 ::FOR :=Mama: Good time don't come looking for you, Jessie. You could work some puzzles .04 ::FOR :=Jessie: Good for her. .04 ::FOR :=Jessie: Why Agnes likes them, for one thing. Why they stay with her when .04 ::FOR :=Jessie: Then what are the whistles for? .04 ::FOR :=Mama: just follow her home. Well, I know for a fact she's still paying on the last .04 ::FOR :=Mama: lived in. Eight fire, and she's due for a new one any day now. .04 ::FOR :=Mama: going to fall down anyway, so why wait for it, is all I could ever make out about .04 ::FOR :=Mama: thought I might get a laugh out of you for once even if it wasn't the truth, Jessie. .05 ::FOR :=Jessie: What for? .05 ::FOR :=Jessie: I thought it might be better for you after he died. You'd get interested .05 ::FOR :=Jessie: and get them, like you got the one for the cocoa. And if somebody else comes .05 ::FOR :=Jessie: just live here together. Be cheaper for both of you and somebody to talk to. .05 ::FOR :=Jessie: I'm sorry you didn't love him. Sorry for you, I mean. He seemed like a nice m .05 ::FOR :=Jessie: her hair done, you could take them all for a walk! .05 ::FOR :=Mama: Ready for your apple now? .05 ::FOR :=Mama: He felt sorry for me. He wanted a plain country woman and .05 ::FOR :=Mama: He felt sorry for you, too, Jessie, don't kid yourself .05 ::FOR :=Mama: right, Thelma. If God had meant for people to go around without any clothes .05 ::FOR :=Mama: you said to? Well I wasn't here for his entertainment and I'm not here for .05 ::FOR :=Mama: Jessie. I don't know what I'm here for, but then I don't think about it. But .05 ::FOR :=Mama: Then what were you asking about him for? Why did you want to know if I loved .05 ::FOR :=Mama: share, though. You loved him enough for both of us. You followed him around like .05 ::FOR :=Mama: for his entertainment and I'm not here for yours either, Jessie. I don't know what .05 ::FOR :=Mama: from fishing and all he'd have to show for it was -- a whole pipe-cleaner family .06 ::FOR :=Jessie: the ambulance for me. All they did for me in the emergency room was let me wake .06 ::FOR :=Jessie: was any reason to call the ambulance for me. All they did for me in the emergency .06 ::FOR :=Jessie: at all. Except he did feel responsible for it. It was his idea to go horseback riding .06 ::FOR :=Jessie: didn't know how to hold on. Cecil left for pretty much the same reason. .06 ::FOR :=Mama: I never thought he was good enough for you. They moved here from Tennessee, .06 ::FOR :=Mama: Nothing I ever did was good enough for you and I want to know why. .06 ::FOR :=Mama: She was Agnes's girl, Carlene. Judge for yourself. .06 ::FOR :=Mama: Why don't you wear that sweater I made for you? Do you remember how I used to look, .07 ::FOR :=Jessie: Or that baby bed he built for Ricky. I told him he didn't have to spend .07 ::FOR :=Jessie: Five years for forgery, ten years for armed assault... .07 ::FOR :=Jessie: is as much like me as it's possible for any human to be. We even wear the same .07 ::FOR :=Jessie: he'll have plenty of that. Five years for forgery, ten years for armed assault .07 ::FOR :=Jessie: "I'm sorry, Jessie, I can't fix it all for you." I said I'd always love me, not .07 ::FOR :=Jessie: Cecil. Ricky is the two of us together for all time in too small a space. And we're .08 ::FOR :=Jessie: For what? .08 ::FOR :=Jessie: Do it for me. Make the sound for me. .08 ::FOR :=Jessie: I'm too heavy for you now. How do you do it? .08 ::FOR :=Jessie: Because I've made lists for everything. But now I remember what things .08 ::FOR :=Jessie: Do it for me. Make the sound for me. .08 ::FOR :=Jessie: forward to. I washed this cover for the sofa, but it'll take both of us to .08 ::FOR :=Jessie: to wash them, buy them, or look for them because I wouldn't remember where .08 ::FOR :=Jessie: I made a list of all the birthdays for you. I even put yours on it. So you can .08 ::FOR :=Jessie: the only way I can get away from you for good is to kill myself? What if it is? .08 ::FOR :=Jessie: to have. I'm just going to go get it for you. You -- just rest a minute. .08 ::FOR :=Jessie: means wrap them up, they're a present for Loretta's birthday. .08 ::FOR :=Mama: Then it's me for giving them to you, but I didn't do .08 ::FOR :=Mama: You used to go looking for your lists, too, I've noticed that. You .08 ::FOR :=Mama: ever! You might be through with it for all time! .08 ::FOR :=Mama: this up! You haven't had a seizure for a solid year. A whole year, do you realize .08 ::FOR :=Mama: a tetanus! But I know what to watch for now. And then you turn blue and the jerks .08 ::FOR :=Mama: not foam like the washer overflowed, for God's sake; it's bubbling like a baby .08 ::FOR :=Mama: there wasn't anything to do but wait for another one. .09 ::FOR :=Jessie: For whatever happens, I don't know. For the .09 ::FOR :=Jessie: even. I'm what was worth waiting for and I didn't make it. Me -- who might .09 ::FOR :=Jessie: For whatever happens, I don't know. For the rest of your life. For Agnes burning .09 ::FOR :=Jessie: me here, what might be worth staying for, and you know what it was? It was maybe .09 ::FOR :=Jessie: want a manicure? We could hold hands for an hour and then I could go shoot myself? .09 ::FOR :=Jessie: and never got there. Somebody I waited for who never came. And never will. So, see, .09 ::FOR :=Jessie: don't know. For the rest of your life. For Agnes burning down one more house or .09 ::FOR :=Jessie: really like rice pudding or cornflakes for breakfast or something, that might be .09 ::FOR :=Mama: I forget what for, right now. .09 ::FOR :=Mama: I'm afraid of it, for me, I mean. When my time comes. I know .09 ::FOR :=Mama: and lock up so I know we're safe for the night, and when I wake up, you're .09 ::FOR :=Mama: be, but it might be worth waiting for! Try it for two more weeks. We could .09 ::FOR :=Mama: out in the back yard just waiting for me to have my hands full someday and .09 ::FOR :=Mama: and thinking, "Boy, are they all in for a surprise." Well, nobody's going to .09 ::FOR :=Mama: Jessie. You make me feel like a fool for being alive, child, and you are so wrong! .09 ::FOR :=Mama: know who they're going to feel sorry for? Me! How about that! Not you, me! They're .09 ::FOR :=Mama: the walk and get just the right rain for them all summer. And Ricky will be married .09 ::FOR :=Mama: it might be worth waiting for! Try it for two more weeks. We could have more talks .10 ::FOR :=Jessie: It's time for me to go, Mama. .10 ::FOR :=Jessie: This letter is for Dawson, but it's mostly about you, so .10 ::FOR :=Jessie: There's a list of presents for you for at least twenty more Christmases and .10 ::FOR :=Jessie: all my house slippers are in a sack for her in my closet. Tell her I know they'll .10 ::FOR :=Jessie: it. Those are just little presents. For whenever you need one. They're not bought .10 ::FOR :=Jessie: to feed them all and have some left for you. But don't let anybody take anything .10 ::FOR :=Jessie: Maybe Agnes could come stay with you for a few days. .10 ::FOR :=Jessie: probably see people you haven't seen for years, but I thought about what you should .10 ::FOR :=Jessie: you want. There's a list of presents for you for at least twenty more Christmases .10 ::FOR :=Jessie: he gave the first one to me. Be funny for her to have it now, don't you think? .10 ::FOR :=Jessie: was this summer or what they're doing for Thanksgiving or how their children.. .10 ::FOR :=Jessie: Christmas, you're getting mostly stuff for the house, like a new rug in your bathroom .10 ::FOR :=Jessie: did, and tell Ricky you have something for him, out here, from me, and to come get .10 ::FOR :=Jessie: my little calculator. Dawson bought it for himself, you know, but then he saw one .10 ::FOR :=Jessie: with it, Mama. And the rest of this is for you. .10 ::FOR :=Mama: And you think he'll go for it? .10 ::FOR :=Mama: No. Probably not. I'm ready for my manicure, I guess. Want me to wash .03 ::FORCE :=Mama: But I didn't force you, did I? .07 ::FORGERY :=Jessie: have plenty of that. Five years for forgery, ten years for armed assault... .09 ::FORGET :=Mama: I forget what for, right now. .10 ::FORGIVE :=Mama: Please! Jessie, Jessie, child -- Forgive me. I thought you were mine. .01 ::FORGOT :=Mama: You haven't forgot what night it is, have you? They're .05 ::FORK :=Mama: me this one pan. Get me one knife, one fork, one big spoon, and the can opener, .01 ::FORTY :=Mama: to somebody with a flea market for forty dollars. .08 ::FORWARD :=Jessie: want this manicure we've been looking forward to. I washed this cover for the sofa, .01 ::FOUND :=Jessie: I found the bullets. They were in an old milk .01 ::FOUND :=Jessie: Here it is. I found it. .03 ::FOUND :=Mama: me. If you'd kept your little house or found another place when Cecil left you, .09 ::FOUND :=Jessie: I am what became of your child. I found an old baby picture of me. And it was .10 ::FOUND :=Jessie: like a free tube of toothpaste I found hanging on the door one day. .06 ::FOURTH :=Jessie: We've had this since last Fourth of July. .08 ::FREAK :=Mama: Make you feel like a freak, is that what I should have done? .10 ::FREE :=Jessie: won't. They're just things, like a free tube of toothpaste I found hanging on .01 ::FREEZER :=Jessie: They can go in the freezer till you're ready for them. Where's .08 ::FRIED :=Mama: to Howard Johnson's and have those fried clams. I know you love that clam r .04 ::FRIEND :=Jessie: One. She's your friend. No marshmallows. .03 ::FRIENDS :=Mama: left you, you'd have made some new friends at least. Had a life to lead. Had .10 ::FRIENDS :=Jessie: And it won't be so bad once your friends start coming to the funeral home. .01 ::FROM :=Mama: You come down from there before you have a fit. I can't .01 ::FROM :=Mama: good enough, then. There's that box from the ones he wore to the hospital. When .02 ::FROM :=Jessie: These are from last week. .03 ::FROM :=Jessie: Oh, everything from you and me to Red China. .03 ::FROM :=Jessie: get off is it's still fifty blocks from where you're going? Well, I can get .03 ::FROM :=Jessie: that's when they took the books away from me. .03 ::FROM :=Jessie: wouldn't kill myself just to get away from them. .04 ::FROM :=Mama: She's calling me from a pay phone this week. God only knows .05 ::FROM :=Mama: laughed about it. And he'd come back from fishing and all he'd have to show for .05 ::FROM :=Mama: more talk out of her birds than I got from the two of you. He could've had that .05 ::FROM :=Mama: He said you were a runt and he said it from the day you were born and he said you .06 ::FROM :=Jessie: Are you going to drink ketchup from the bottle or what? How can you want .06 ::FROM :=Mama: only sees the driveway looking down from a stretcher passed out cold? .06 ::FROM :=Mama: good enough for you. They moved here from Tennessee, you know. .07 ::FROM :=Jessie: not to trust anybody and he got it straight from me. And he knows not to try .08 ::FROM :=Jessie: What if the only way I can get away from you for good is to kill myself? What .08 ::FROM :=Mama: took you in and let your life get away from you or all of it put together. I don't .10 ::FROM :=Jessie: No, Mama. You have to be more selfish from now on. Now, somebody's bound to ask .10 ::FROM :=Jessie: you have something for him, out here, from me, and to come get it. .10 ::FROM :=Mama: have to knock me down to get away from me, Jessie. I'm not about to let yo .10 ::FROM :=Mama: she calls it. I know it doesn't come from Ireland. I think it just comes with .03 ::FRONT :=Jessie: See where all this is? Red hots up front, sour balls and horehound mixed together .06 ::FRONT :=Mama: about that? You who doesn't go to the front steps? You, who only sees the driveway .10 ::FRONT :=Mama: I can too! I'll stand in front of this hall and you can't get past .03 ::FUDGE :=Jessie: the grocery, that Susie will take your fudge next door to the grocery and it'll .01 ::FULL :=Jessie: Full of shoes. I looked already. .04 ::FULL :=Jessie: I didn't know she had a house full of birds! .04 ::FULL :=Mama: Why does she have a house full of birds? .05 ::FULL :=Mama: chance not to talk to me and he took full advantage of it. .05 ::FULL :=Mama: know. Never once. His tackle box was full of chewing tobacco and all he ever did .09 ::FULL :=Mama: just waiting for me to have my hands full someday and how am I supposed to protect .08 ::FULL-TIME :=Mama: two weeks altogether, and she had a full-time secretary job and an IQ of 120 .02 ::FUNERAL :=Jessie: Then call the police. Then call the funeral home. Then call Loretta and see if .10 ::FUNERAL :=Jessie: once your friends start coming to the funeral home. You'll probably see people .05 ::FUNNIER :=Mama: whole thing. He just thought it was funnier that way. God, this milk in here .01 ::FUNNY :=Mama: Very funny. Very funny. .01 ::FUNNY :=Mama: Very funny. Very funny. .03 ::FUNNY :=Jessie: No. It's a funny idea, though. What do you sing? .06 ::FUNNY :=Mama: I guess you think that's funny. .06 ::FUNNY :=Mama: And they didn't think something was funny about that? You who doesn't go to the .08 ::FUNNY :=Mama: That's not funny. .10 ::FUNNY :=Jessie: so he gave the first one to me. Be funny for her to have it now, don't you think? .03 ::FURNITURE :=Mama: right this minute, let's rearrange the furniture. .03 ::FUSE :=Jessie: a couple of packages of fuses in the fuse box. There's candles and matches in .03 ::FUSES :=Jessie: And we've got a couple of packages of fuses in the fuse box. There's candles and .04 ::FUSSING :=Jessie: We can't go on fussing all night. I mean, I could ask you .08 ::GAGGING :=Mama: in and out, and you sound like you're gagging, sucking air in and out like you .01 ::GARBAGE :=Jessie: like a rubber sheet or something. Garbage bags would do if there's enough. .07 ::GARBAGE :=Jessie: Mama, you don't pack your garbage when you move. .08 ::GARBAGE :=Jessie: Garbage night is Tuesday. Put it out as late .08 ::GARBAGE :=Mama: You will not call yourself garbage, Jessie. .03 ::GARDEN :=Mama: could work some puzzles or put in a garden or go to the store. Let's call a taxi .10 ::GARDEN :=Jessie: Connie." And then ask how their garden was this summer or what they're doing .01 ::GAVE :=Jessie: How about this swimming towel Loretta gave us? Beach towel, that's the name of .07 ::GAVE :=Jessie: do. I think he did the right thing. He gave himself another chance, that's all. .08 ::GAVE :=Mama: Your daddy gave you those fits, Jessie. He passed it .08 ::GAVE :=Mama: a popsicle and down you went. He gave it to you. It's his fault, not mine .09 ::GAVE :=Mama: and I never even saw it. And then you gave me this chance to make it better, convince .10 ::GAVE :=Jessie: somewhere. It's Granny's ring she gave me and I thought you might like to have .10 ::GAVE :=Jessie: every penny the way she does, so he gave the first one to me. Be funny for her .10 ::GAVE :=Jessie: but I didn't think you'd wear it if I gave it to you right now. .01 ::GET :=Jessie: Get your hands washed. I'll be right back. .01 ::GET :=Jessie: I'll go back and get it in a minute. There's a wagon wheel .01 ::GET :=Jessie: real dry. You dry your hands till I get back or it's no go, all right? .01 ::GET :=Jessie: hands washed. I'll be right back. And get 'em real dry. You dry your hands till .01 ::GET :=Jessie: there, too. There's even a churn. I'll get it all if you want. .01 ::GET :=Mama: And I told you, we don't get criminals out here. .01 ::GET :=Mama: it if you want. When I die, you'll get it all, anyway. .01 ::GET :=Mama: sugar. He'll get back in school or get a job or one day you'll get a call and .01 ::GET :=Mama: you have a fit. I can't come up and get you, you know. .01 ::GET :=Mama: He just needs some time, sugar. He'll get back in school or get a job or one day .01 ::GET :=Mama: school or get a job or one day you'll get a call and he'll say he's sorry for all .02 ::GET :=Jessie: I don't know it's quiet. So nobody can get me. .02 ::GET :=Jessie: bedroom and lock the door. Dawson will get here just in time to help you clean up. .02 ::GET :=Mama: Where did you get those? .02 ::GET :=Mama: I know. What's his name, Timmy? Get you somebody to talk to. .03 ::GET :=Jessie: a job do? The kind of job I could get would make me feel worse. .03 ::GET :=Jessie: TV was somewhere else, you wouldn't get such a glare on it during the day. I'll .03 ::GET :=Jessie: even if I ride fifty more years and get off then, it's the same place when I .03 ::GET :=Jessie: from where you're going? Well, I can get off right now if I want to, because even .03 ::GET :=Jessie: to it. Whenever I feel like it, I can get off. As soon as I've had enough, it's .03 ::GET :=Jessie: I don't have any reason to think it'll get anything but worse. I'm tired. I'm hurt. .03 ::GET :=Jessie: Mother. I wouldn't kill myself just to get away from them. .03 ::GET :=Jessie: Sunday, for your puzzles; you'll still get that one. .03 ::GET :=Jessie: than anything in the world you want to get off and the only reason in the world .03 ::GET :=Jessie: the only reason in the world you don't get off is it's still fifty blocks from where .03 ::GET :=Mama: Let's get another dog, Jessie! You liked a big .03 ::GET :=Mama: We could get a new dog and keep him in the house. .03 ::GET :=Mama: You could get a job! .03 ::GET :=Mama: It's Ricky. You're trying to get through to him. .03 ::GET :=Mama: mad about doing the wash, we can get Loretta to do it. .03 ::GET :=Mama: Or maybe the doctor would let you get a driver's license now, or I know what .03 ::GET :=Mama: personal, hon. They don't mean to get on your nerves. They don't even mean .03 ::GET :=Mama: your gums are swelling again, we can get you to the dentist in the morning. .03 ::GET :=Mama: shelf paper and wash the floor when I get through. You just watch me. You don't .03 ::GET :=Mama: some new trouble he's into. You could get one that he's got a job, that he's getting .04 ::GET :=Jessie: now. Where would she go? She can't get Buster to build her a new one, he's dead. .04 ::GET :=Jessie: eats okra twice a day? Where does she get it in the winter? .04 ::GET :=Mama: Or used to. And you don't get cocoa like mine anywhere anymore. .04 ::GET :=Mama: eat okra two meals a day and expect to get away with it. Made her crazy. .04 ::GET :=Mama: you about it because I thought I might get a laugh out of you for once even if it .05 ::GET :=Jessie: about to dance and wasn't I going to get a kick out of that. Or sit up with a .05 ::GET :=Jessie: they'll be here. You'll bend down and get them, like you got the one for the cocoa. .05 ::GET :=Jessie: be better for you after he died. You'd get interested in things. Breathe better. .05 ::GET :=Mama: Just leave me this one pan. Get me one knife, one fork, one big spoon, .05 ::GET :=Mama: on the porch and I told him to get a shirt on and he went in and got one .05 ::GET :=Mama: Agnes near this place. You don't get off as easy as that, child. .05 ::GET :=Mama: You think you can rest easy if you get me a new babysitter? Well, I don't want .05 ::GET :=Mama: opener, and put them out where I can get them. .05 ::GET :=Mama: to him. And it didn't mean we didn't get along. It wasn't important. We didn't .05 ::GET :=Mama: pans cluttering up my cabinets I can't get down to, anyway. Throw them out. Every .06 ::GET :=Jessie: And I couldn't get one on my own, of course. .06 ::GET :=Jessie: you out around the place, come in and get some coffee and talk to you. God knows .06 ::GET :=Mama: I'm going to get some. I thought they stopped making it. .06 ::GET :=Mama: How were you going to get a husband never opening your mouth to .06 ::GET :=Mama: people always say the right thing or get whatever they want, or what? .07 ::GET :=Jessie: from me. And he knows not to try to get work, and guess where he got that. .07 ::GET :=Jessie: us is Ricky's out there trying to get even . And he knows not to trust anybody .07 ::GET :=Jessie: I loved Cecil so much. And I tried to get more exercise and I tried to stay awake. .08 ::GET :=Jessie: Just get the manicure tray and sit down! .08 ::GET :=Jessie: How do I get to the bed? .08 ::GET :=Jessie: No thanks. You get the manicure and I'll be right there .08 ::GET :=Jessie: and put them in this drawer. They'll get lost if you don't, and rubber bands or .08 ::GET :=Jessie: as late as you can. The Davis's dogs get in it if you don't. And keep ordering .08 ::GET :=Jessie: people to have. I'm just going to go get it for you. You -- just rest a minut .08 ::GET :=Jessie: you here? What if the only way I can get away from you for good is to kill myself? .08 ::GET :=Jessie: the sofa, but it'll take both of us to get it back on. .08 ::GET :=Mama: I call Dawson. But I get you cleaned up before he gets here and .08 ::GET :=Mama: You got me once real good. I had to get a tetanus! But I know what to watch for .08 ::GET :=Mama: Your mouth bites down and I have to get your tongue out of the way fast, so you .08 ::GET :=Mama: you're about to have one. Your eyes get this big! But, Jessie, you haven't.. .08 ::GET :=Mama: bubbling like a baby spitting up. I go get a wet washcloth, that's all. And then .08 ::GET :=Mama: man or I took you in and let your life get away from you or all of it put together. .09 ::GET :=Mama: making the coffee and watching me get older every day, and you're supposed .09 ::GET :=Mama: my grave, and you're real smart to get away before then because, I mean, honey, .09 ::GET :=Mama: of it. You can keep trying. You can get brave and try some more . You don't have .09 ::GET :=Mama: put in some begonias up the walk and get just the right rain for them all summer. .09 ::GET :=Mama: to go, Jessie. How can I -- How can I get up every day knowing you had to kill .09 ::GET :=Mama: hurt or take very long or what I don't get done before it happens. .10 ::GET :=Jessie: enough people home afterward so you get enough food to feed them all and have .10 ::GET :=Jessie: him, out here, from me, and to come get it. .10 ::GET :=Jessie: will be here and they'll come in and get me and you know how that goes. You stay .10 ::GET :=Jessie: I thought about what you should say to get you over that nervous part when the first .10 ::GET :=Jessie: in. First of all, you won't be able to get in by yourself, but I don't want you .10 ::GET :=Jessie: to still be up and dressed so they can get right over. .10 ::GET :=Mama: Loretta will get all the food set up, honey. It's only .10 ::GET :=Mama: if Connie Richards does come, I can get her to tell me where she gets that Irish .10 ::GET :=Mama: in front of this hall and you can't get past me. You'll have to knock me down .10 ::GET :=Mama: me. You'll have to knock me down to get away from me, Jessie. I'm not about to .01 ::GETS :=Jessie: to be clean, Mama. Old powder, dust gets in it... .02 ::GETS :=Jessie: him, I'll just have to do it before he gets here. Soon as you hang up the phone, .03 ::GETS :=Jessie: them to add on cigarettes until it gets to fifteen dollars. .05 ::GETS :=Mama: Agnes gets more talk out of her birds than I got .08 ::GETS :=Mama: But I get you cleaned up before he gets here and I make him leave before you .10 ::GETS :=Jessie: Well, then, I hope he gets some good dope with it, Mama. And the .10 ::GETS :=Jessie: need something to do till somebody gets here, so wash the hot chocolate pan. .10 ::GETS :=Mama: I can get her to tell me where she gets that Irish yarn, she calls it. I know .02 ::GETTING :=Mama: You know what the doctor said about getting excited. You'll cock the pistol and .03 ::GETTING :=Mama: Well! Now we're getting somewhere. They're none of them ever .03 ::GETTING :=Mama: get one that he's got a job, that he's getting married, or how about he's joined .05 ::GETTING :=Jessie: you, well, one day when Agnes is out getting her hair done, you could take them .08 ::GETTING :=Jessie: I'm even feeling like worrying or getting mad and I'm not afraid it will start .10 ::GETTING :=Jessie: read that page. This Christmas, you're getting mostly stuff for the house, like .03 ::GIFT :=Jessie: phone bill, and I tried to work at the gift shop at the hospital and they said I .04 ::GIRL :=Mama: When she was a girl, Jess, not now. Long time ago. But she's .06 ::GIRL :=Mama: He had a girl, Jessie. I walked right in on them in .06 ::GIRL :=Mama: She was Agnes's girl, Carlene. Judge for yourself. .09 ::GIRL :=Mama: you. Do it the hard way, that's my girl, all right. You know who they're going .03 ::GIVE :=Mama: lead. Had your own things around you. Give Ricky a place to come see you. You never .06 ::GIVE :=Jessie: order blanks in an egg box, and you give the bills to Dawson once a month. .07 ::GIVE :=Mama: Give him time, Jess. .09 ::GIVE :=Mama: and try some more . You don't have to give up! .10 ::GIVE :=Jessie: better add it to this list before you give it to him. Or if you want to be surprised, .10 ::GIVE :=Mama: be by myself, I think. You want me to give people those things? .10 ::GIVE :=Mama: make you feel the way he did and I'll give Ricky's watch to Dawson if I feel like .04 ::GIVEN :=Jessie: What's she ever said? She must've given you some reason. .08 ::GIVING :=Mama: Then it's me for giving them to you, but I didn't do it! .09 ::GIVING :=Jessie: I'm not giving up! This is the other thing I'm trying .09 ::GLAD :=Mama: daddy's not looking and then be real glad when they've gone home and left you .10 ::GLAD :=Jessie: Dawson hears you tell her that. I'm glad he loves Loretta so much, but I wish .03 ::GLARE :=Jessie: else, you wouldn't get such a glare on it during the day. I'll do whatever .01 ::GLASSES :=Mama: Now my glasses, please. I told him to take those .06 ::GLASSES :=Mama: leave you? Where did you put my old glasses? .03 ::GLUE :=Jessie: sandpaper, masking tape, Elmer's glue, thumbtacks, that kind of stuff. The .01 ::GO :=Jessie: I'll go back and get it in a minute. There's a .01 ::GO :=Jessie: They can go in the freezer till you're ready for them. .01 ::GO :=Jessie: your hands till I get back or it's no go, all right? .01 ::GO :=Mama: Don't go making a big mess, Jessie. It's eight .01 ::GO :=Mama: A whole case will go stale, Jessie. .01 ::GO :=Mama: I thought Dawson told you not to go up those stairs. .01 ::GO :=Mama: It's plenty safe! As long as you don't go up there. .02 ::GO :=Jessie: I have to go in the bedroom and lock the door behind .02 ::GO :=Jessie: just in time to help you clean up. Go ahead, call him. Then call the police. .02 ::GO :=Jessie: me new slippers, too small, but they go with the robe, he'll say. Be back in a .02 ::GO :=Mama: You'll go to hell just for saying that, Jessie! .02 ::GO :=Mama: It's a sin. You'll go to hell. .02 ::GO :=Mama: How an I supposed to act? Tell you to go ahead? O.K. by me, sugar? Might try it .03 ::GO :=Jessie: I'll do whatever you want before I go. .03 ::GO :=Jessie: I'm going to do what I can before I go. We're not just going to sit around tonight. .03 ::GO :=Jessie: of the broom closet, but if the lights go out, just call Dawson and sit tight. But .03 ::GO :=Mama: Go back to your list. You're hurt by wha .03 ::GO :=Mama: some puzzles or put in a garden or go to the store. Let's call a taxi and to .03 ::GO :=Mama: you drink too much coffee or you never go out of the house or what? .04 ::GO :=Jessie: We can't go on fussing all night. I mean, I could .04 ::GO :=Jessie: her house down now. Where would she go? She can't get Buster to build her a new .04 ::GO :=Mama: the driveway, but that's as far as I go." .05 ::GO :=Jessie: are good this year and you want to go picking with Agnes. .05 ::GO :=Jessie: than blue socks. Is that something to go tell Mother? You were just jealous because .05 ::GO :=Mama: to think about. I like things to go on. .05 ::GO :=Mama: Thelma. If God had meant for people to go around without any clothes on, they'd .05 ::GO :=Mama: talk with Agnes. She's just around. We go back, that's all. I'm not letting Agnes .06 ::GO :=Jessie: I said I didn't think you'd want to go, and they said, "Yeah, everybody's got .06 ::GO :=Jessie: responsible for it. It was his idea to go horseback riding that day. It was his .06 ::GO :=Mama: was funny about that? You who doesn't go to the front steps? You, who only sees .07 ::GO :=Mama: again, honey, that happens sometimes. Go downtown. Find him. Talk to him. He didn't .07 ::GO :=Mama: you're not going to know that till you go see him. Or call him up! Right now! He .08 ::GO :=Jessie: it will start a fit if I do, I just go ahead. .08 ::GO :=Jessie: want people to have. I'm just going to go get it for you. You -- just rest a mi .08 ::GO :=Mama: You used to go looking for your lists, too, I've noticed .08 ::GO :=Mama: ago in a magazine, how little fits go, just little blackouts where maybe their .08 ::GO :=Mama: bubbling like a baby spitting up. I go get a wet washcloth, that's all. And then .09 ::GO :=Jessie: hands for an hour and then I could go shoot myself? I'm sorry about tonight, .09 ::GO :=Jessie: me. And hope. I say no! Just let me go easy, Mama. .09 ::GO :=Mama: How can I let you go? .09 ::GO :=Mama: I will stay here until they make me go, until they drag me screaming and I mean .09 ::GO :=Mama: want to die and I don't want you to go, Jessie. How can I -- How can I get up .09 ::GO :=Mama: and drink my milk. You're supposed to go around and lock up so I know we're safe .09 ::GO :=Mama: years. I don't have that many more to go, Jessie. And as soon as I'm dead, you .10 ::GO :=Jessie: Let go of me, Mama. I've said everything I had .10 ::GO :=Jessie: Let me go, Mama. .10 ::GO :=Jessie: It's time for me to go, Mama. .10 ::GO :=Jessie: really won't understand how you let me go. .10 ::GO :=Mama: I can't. You can't go. You can't do this. You didn't say it .10 ::GO :=Mama: And you think he'll go for it? .10 ::GO :=Mama: What if Dawson and Loretta want me to go home with them? .04 ::GOD :=Mama: calling me from a pay phone this week. God only knows why. She has a perfectly good .05 ::GOD :=Mama: the point, "You're right, Thelma. If God had meant for people to go around without .05 ::GOD :=Mama: just thought it was funnier that way. God, this milk in here. .06 ::GOD :=Jessie: and get some coffee and talk to you. God knows what you thought. All that curly .08 ::GOD'S :=Mama: foam like the washer overflowed, for God's sake; it's bubbling like a baby spitting .10 ::GOES :=Jessie: in and get me and you know how that goes. You stay out here with Dawson and Loretta. .01 ::GOING :=Jessie: I'm going to kill myself, Mama. .01 ::GOING :=Mama: You feel fine. You're just going to kill yourself. .01 ::GOING :=Mama: It's just something Ricky's going through. Maybe he's in with some bad .02 ::GOING :=Jessie: If I'd known you were going to act like this, I wouldn't have told .02 ::GOING :=Mama: We're just going to sit around like every other night .02 ::GOING :=Mama: You're not going to kill yourself, Jessie. You're not .02 ::GOING :=Mama: And where was I while this was going on? .02 ::GOING :=Mama: night in the world and then you're going to kill yourself? You'll miss. You'll .03 ::GOING :=Jessie: about two weeks already. You're not going to need toilet paper till Thanksgi .03 ::GOING :=Jessie: to say what happens to it. And it's going to stop. And I'm going to stop it. .03 ::GOING :=Jessie: still fifty blocks from where you're going? Well, I can get off right now if I .03 ::GOING :=Jessie: a bit. I am worried about you, but I'm going to do what I can before I go. We're .03 ::GOING :=Jessie: really have that belongs to me and I'm going to say what happens to it. And it's .03 ::GOING :=Jessie: to it. And it's going to stop. And I'm going to stop it. So. Let's just have a good .03 ::GOING :=Jessie: what I can before I go. We're not just going to sit around tonight. I made a list .03 ::GOING :=Mama: nothing says those calls are always going to be some new trouble he's into. You .03 ::GOING :=Mama: about what? There's nothing real sad going on right now. If it was after your .03 ::GOING :=Mama: you don't like me and you don't like going out and you don't like staying in and .04 ::GOING :=Jessie: dragging the truth out of you, this is going to take all night. .04 ::GOING :=Mama: they lived in, you knew they were going to fall down anyway, so why wait for .05 ::GOING :=Jessie: man was about to dance and wasn't I going to get a kick out of that. Or sit up .05 ::GOING :=Jessie: with him if I wanted to, but you were going to watch Gunsmoke. What did he say .05 ::GOING :=Mama: Who's going to come cook here? .05 ::GOING :=Mama: I'm not going to cook. I never liked it, anyway. .05 ::GOING :=Mama: what he was thinking about and you're going to tell me. .06 ::GOING :=Jessie: Are you going to drink ketchup from the bottle or .06 ::GOING :=Jessie: that's always just what you think it's going to be. Just like it was the last time, .06 ::GOING :=Mama: I'm going to get some. I thought they stopped .06 ::GOING :=Mama: How were you going to get a husband never opening your .06 ::GOING :=Mama: And you told them you weren't going to be ordering anymore? .07 ::GOING :=Mama: things different now, but you're not going to know that till you go see him. Or .08 ::GOING :=Jessie: things I want people to have. I'm just going to go get it for you. You -- just rest .09 ::GOING :=Jessie: made a difference to me -- I'm not going to show up, so there's no reason to .09 ::GOING :=Mama: How about that! Not you, me! They're going to be ashamed of you. Yes. Ashamed! .09 ::GOING :=Mama: girl, all right. You know who they're going to feel sorry for? Me! How about that! .09 ::GOING :=Mama: all in for a surprise." Well, nobody's going to be a bit surprised, sweetheart. .10 ::GOING :=Jessie: but next Christmas, you're really going to cost him next Christmas. I think .10 ::GOING :=Mama: Don't you do this, Jessie. I'm not going to stop screaming until you open this .02 ::GONE :=Jessie: everybody and everything I ever knew, gone. Dead is dead quiet. .03 ::GONE :=Jessie: my neck, like Daddy's on the barn. GONE FISHING. .05 ::GONE :=Mama: the two of you. He could've had that GONE FISHING sign around his neck in that .08 ::GONE :=Jessie: straight and all, before now, I'd be gone already. .08 ::GONE :=Jessie: good. I really am. The double vision's gone and my gums aren't swelling. No rashes .09 ::GONE :=Mama: and then be real glad when they've gone home and left you to your quiet aga .09 ::GONE :=Mama: do whatever you want. Maybe with me gone, you'll have all the quiet you want, .09 ::GONE :=Mama: can't stop you because you're already gone! I guess you think they'll all have .09 ::GONE :=Mama: your life. Who am I talking to? You're gone already, aren't you? I'm looking right .04 ::GONNA :=Mama: "Like a corpse," she says, "and I'm gonna be one soon enough as it is." .01 ::GOOD :=Jessie: That's a good idea, Mama. .01 ::GOOD :=Jessie: Waited until I felt good enough, in fact. .01 ::GOOD :=Jessie: out of a yard chair would be real good. .01 ::GOOD :=Mama: Well, you didn't look good enough, then. There's that box from .02 ::GOOD :=Jessie: prowlers. He said he thought it was a good idea. He told me what kind to ask f .02 ::GOOD :=Mama: That gun's no good, you know. He broke it right before .03 ::GOOD :=Jessie: Good. Thank you. .03 ::GOOD :=Jessie: to stop it. So. Let's just have a good time. .03 ::GOOD :=Jessie: Mama -- I'm just not having a very good time and I don't have any reason to .03 ::GOOD :=Jessie: I could have a seizure any time. What good would a job do? The kind of job I could .03 ::GOOD :=Mama: Good time don't come looking for you, Jessie. .03 ::GOOD :=Mama: Not good enough. What things? .03 ::GOOD :=Mama: Have a good time. .03 ::GOOD :=Mama: We've got a good life here! .03 ::GOOD :=Mama: You're not having a good time! Whoever promised you a good time? .03 ::GOOD :=Mama: a good time! Whoever promised you a good time? Do you think I've had a good .03 ::GOOD :=Mama: a good time? Do you think I've had a good time? .04 ::GOOD :=Jessie: Good for her. .04 ::GOOD :=Mama: Well now, what a good idea. We should've had more cocoa. Cocoa .04 ::GOOD :=Mama: only knows why. She has a perfectly good Trimline at home. .05 ::GOOD :=Jessie: It feels good to be right about it. .05 ::GOOD :=Jessie: What if the strawberries are good this year and you want to go picking .06 ::GOOD :=Jessie: I guess you and Agnes had a good talk about that, huh? .06 ::GOOD :=Jessie: why he hated it so much when it's so good. Smoking is the only thing I know that's .06 ::GOOD :=Mama: I never thought he was good enough for you. They moved here from .06 ::GOOD :=Mama: Nothing I ever did was good enough for you and I want to know w .08 ::GOOD :=Jessie: I sure am feeling good. I really am. The double vision's gone .08 ::GOOD :=Jessie: O.K. Pick one, then. A good one. I think I want to know now. .08 ::GOOD :=Jessie: only way I can get away from you for good is to kill myself? What if it is? I .08 ::GOOD :=Jessie: No rashes or anything. I'm feeling as good as I ever felt in my life. I'm even .08 ::GOOD :=Mama: You got me once real good. I had to get a tetanus! But I know .08 ::GOOD :=Mama: Your memory's always been good. When couldn't you remember things? .09 ::GOOD :=Jessie: part that's made this last part so good, Mama. No, Mama. This is how I have .09 ::GOOD :=Jessie: reason enough because I'm not -- very good company. Am I. .09 ::GOOD :=Jessie: things that might work, but might work isn't good enough anymore. I need something .09 ::GOOD :=Mama: Rice pudding is good. .10 ::GOOD :=Jessie: Good. That's good, Mama. .10 ::GOOD :=Jessie: Good. That's good, Mama. .10 ::GOOD :=Jessie: Well, then, I hope he gets some good dope with it, Mama. And the rest of .10 ::GOOD :=Jessie: it already. I'd like to buy him a good meal. .10 ::GOOD :=Jessie: you wore to Daddy's. You looked real good in that. .10 ::GOOD :=Jessie: him we talked about him and I only had good things to say about him, but mainly .10 ::GOOD :=Mama: about what they have on, that's always good. And I'll have some crochet work with .01 ::GOT :=Jessie: We got any old towels? .01 ::GOT :=Jessie: I know. I got it on the schedule. .01 ::GOT :=Jessie: Maybe an old blanket or towels we got in a soap box sometime? .01 ::GOT :=Mama: I shoulda got you to bring down that milk can. Agnes .01 ::GOT :=Mama: I mean, I don't even want what we got, Jessie. .02 ::GOT :=Jessie: You got me dusting powder, Loretta got me a new .02 ::GOT :=Jessie: You got me dusting powder, Loretta got me a new housecoat, pink probably, and .02 ::GOT :=Jessie: be taking an interest in things. He got through telling me all about the bullets .02 ::GOT :=Jessie: housecoat, pink probably, and Dawson got me new slippers, too small, but they .02 ::GOT :=Mama: Jessie. Don't you want to know what we got you? .03 ::GOT :=Jessie: or do you want Dawson to? I've got a note to him. I'll add that to it if .03 ::GOT :=Jessie: sink, but you call Dawson if you've got one and let him do it. .03 ::GOT :=Jessie: they got it. Like my mail-order bra got delivered to their house. .03 ::GOT :=Jessie: to them, it belongs to you, only they got it. Like my mail-order bra got delivered .03 ::GOT :=Jessie: in a box in the hall closet. And we've got a couple of packages of fuses in the .03 ::GOT :=Mama: We've got a good life here! .03 ::GOT :=Mama: he's into. You could get one that he's got a job, that he's getting married, or .04 ::GOT :=Mama: 'Cause nobody ever got hurt, I guess. Agnes woke everybody up .04 ::GOT :=Mama: now. Long time ago. But she's still got it in her, I'm sure of it. .05 ::GOT :=Jessie: bend down and get them, like you got the one for the cocoa. And if somebody .05 ::GOT :=Mama: I didn't have a thing he wanted. He got his share, though. You loved him enough .05 ::GOT :=Mama: to get a shirt on and he went in and got one and then he said, real peaceful, .05 ::GOT :=Mama: him look at the weather rolling in. I got where I could practically see the boat .05 ::GOT :=Mama: gets more talk out of her birds than I got from the two of you. He could've had .06 ::GOT :=Jessie: go, and they said, "Yeah, everybody's got their own idea of vacation." .07 ::GOT :=Jessie: to try to get work, and guess where he got that. He walks around like there's .07 ::GOT :=Jessie: And he knows not to trust anybody and he got it straight from me. And he knows .08 ::GOT :=Jessie: pay to buy the cheap ones. And I've got all the ties here with the hammers and .08 ::GOT :=Mama: You got me once real good. I had to get a tetanus! .09 ::GOT :=Jessie: You've got plenty of time left. .09 ::GOT :=Jessie: and lonely, somebody who cried and got fed, and reached up and got held and .09 ::GOT :=Jessie: was. Or who I tried to be and never got there. Somebody I waited for who never .09 ::GOT :=Jessie: cried and got fed, and reached up and got held and kicked but didn't hurt anybody, .09 ::GOT :=Mama: If you've got the guts to kill yourself, Jessie, you've .09 ::GOT :=Mama: guts to kill yourself, Jessie, you've got the guts to stay alive. .10 ::GOT :=Mama: No, Jessie, you've got all night! .10 ::GOT :=Mama: I think I'll stay here. All they've got is Sanka. .10 ::GOT :=Mama: do. I do. We're not through yet. We've got a lot of things to take care of here. .04 ::GOTTA :=Mama: on the last parrot she bought. You gotta keep your life filled up, she says. .09 ::GRANDBABIES :=Mama: married by then and he'll bring your grandbabies over and you can sneak them a .10 ::GRANNY'S :=Jessie: nice present in there somewhere. It's Granny's ring she gave me and I thought you .09 ::GRAVE :=Mama: and I mean screeching into my grave, and you're real smart to get away .08 ::GREEN :=Mama: He passed it down to you like your green eyes and your straight hair. It's not .10 ::GREEN :=Mama: Ireland. I think it just comes with a green wrapper. .03 ::GROCERY :=Jessie: The grocery won't deliver on Saturday anymore. .03 ::GROCERY :=Jessie: like their talk. The account at the grocery is in Dawson's name when you call. .03 ::GROCERY :=Jessie: the Sweet Tooth before you call the grocery, that Susie will take your fudge .03 ::GROCERY :=Jessie: will take your fudge next door to the grocery and it'll all come out together. .06 ::GROUND :=Jessie: I knew you wouldn't pour it on the ground... .01 ::GROW :=Mama: Ricky will grow out of this and be a real fine boy, .03 ::GROWN :=Mama: you might want a place of your own. A grown woman should... .02 ::GUESS :=Jessie: with Agnes. About the milk can, I guess. Anyway, I asked Dawson if he thought .04 ::GUESS :=Jessie: You guess what? What's she ever said? She must've .04 ::GUESS :=Mama: I guess not. .04 ::GUESS :=Mama: I guess. .04 ::GUESS :=Mama: 'Cause nobody ever got hurt, I guess. Agnes woke everybody up to watch the .05 ::GUESS :=Jessie: I don't know, Mama! His life, I guess. His corn. His boots. Us. Things. You .06 ::GUESS :=Jessie: I guess you and Agnes had a good talk about .06 ::GUESS :=Mama: I guess you think that's funny. .07 ::GUESS :=Jessie: And he knows not to try to get work, and guess where he got that. He walks around .08 ::GUESS :=Jessie: the phenobarb's about right now, I guess. .09 ::GUESS :=Mama: all have to talk about you now! I guess you think this will really confuse .09 ::GUESS :=Mama: you because you're already gone! I guess you think they'll all have to talk .10 ::GUESS :=Jessie: I guess. I tried to be quiet about it. Those .10 ::GUESS :=Jessie: They'll do that gunpowder test, I guess, and ask you what happened, and by .10 ::GUESS :=Jessie: And whatever reasons I had, well, you guess I just took them with me. .10 ::GUESS :=Mama: I guess not. .10 ::GUESS :=Mama: not. I'm ready for my manicure, I guess. Want me to wash my hands again? .10 ::GUESS :=Mama: did you do all this? During my naps, I guess. .03 ::GUMS :=Mama: Then what is it? Are you sick? If your gums are swelling again, we can get you to .08 ::GUMS :=Jessie: am. The double vision's gone and my gums aren't swelling. No rashes or anything. .01 ::GUN :=Jessie: And I told you -- The gun is for me. .01 ::GUN :=Jessie: you're ready for them. Where's Daddy's gun? .01 ::GUN :=Mama: What do you want the gun for, Jess? .01 ::GUN :=Mama: I don't like the idea of a gun, Jess. .01 ::GUN :=Mama: I wouldn't want Ricky to know we had a gun in the house. .02 ::GUN :=Mama: And then I told you where the gun was. .02 ::GUN :=Mama: And you can't use your father's gun, either. It's mine now, too. And you .02 ::GUN :=Mama: to this. Yes he will. He'll take the gun away. .02 ::GUN'S :=Mama: That gun's no good, you know. He broke it right .02 ::GUNPOWDER :=Jessie: They'll probably test your hands for gunpowder, anyway, but you'll pass. .10 ::GUNPOWDER :=Jessie: They'll do that gunpowder test, I guess, and ask you what .05 ::GUNSMOKE :=Jessie: wanted to, but you were going to watch Gunsmoke. What did he say to you? .09 ::GUTS :=Mama: If you've got the guts to kill yourself, Jessie, you've got .09 ::GUTS :=Mama: kill yourself, Jessie, you've got the guts to stay alive. .01 ::HAD :=Jessie: took were the last valuable things I had, so now he's started in on other people, .01 ::HAD :=Mama: you, I wouldn't want Ricky to know we had a gun in the house. .02 ::HAD :=Jessie: Seems O.K. I had Cecil's all ready in there, just in case .02 ::HAD :=Mama: If he had any idea... .02 ::HAD :=Mama: use my towels! They're my towels. I've had them for a long time. I like my towe .03 ::HAD :=Jessie: I've had you, Mama. .03 ::HAD :=Jessie: it, I can get off. As soon as I've had enough, it's my stop. I've had enoug .03 ::HAD :=Jessie: you, and they learned it before you had a chance to say whether you wanted them .03 ::HAD :=Jessie: as I've had enough, it's my stop. I've had enough. .03 ::HAD :=Mama: you a good time? Do you think I've had a good time? .03 ::HAD :=Mama: have made some new friends at least. Had a life to lead. Had your own things around .03 ::HAD :=Mama: were those other things? Hurt -- You had this all ready to say to me, didn't you? .03 ::HAD :=Mama: friends at least. Had a life to lead. Had your own things around you. Give Ricky .04 ::HAD :=Jessie: I didn't know she had a house full of birds! .04 ::HAD :=Mama: using the pay phone because she had another little fire problem at home. .04 ::HAD :=Mama: now, what a good idea. We should've had more cocoa. Cocoa is perfect. .05 ::HAD :=Mama: No, I don't know, Jessie! You had those quiet little conversations after .05 ::HAD :=Mama: a couple of times but he always had more somewhere. .05 ::HAD :=Mama: point, "You're right, Thelma. If God had meant for people to go around without .05 ::HAD :=Mama: I got from the two of you. He could've had that GONE FISHING sign around his neck .05 ::HAD :=Mama: rather talk to him than anything! If I had died instead of him, he wouldn't have .06 ::HAD :=Jessie: We've had this since last Fourth of July. .06 ::HAD :=Jessie: I guess you and Agnes had a good talk about that, huh? .06 ::HAD :=Mama: He had a girl, Jessie. I walked right in on .07 ::HAD :=Jessie: so much time on it, but he said it had to last, and the thing ended up weighing .07 ::HAD :=Mama: He had responsibilities here. He had a wife .07 ::HAD :=Mama: He had responsibilities here. He had a wife and son here and he failed yo .07 ::HAD :=Mama: Talk to him. He didn't know what he had in you. Maybe he sees things different .08 ::HAD :=Jessie: So what if he had little fits? It's not inherited. I fell .08 ::HAD :=Jessie: You mean to tell me I had fits all the time as a kid and you just .08 ::HAD :=Jessie: Daddy would've known if he'd had fits, Mama. .08 ::HAD :=Jessie: I won't be here. If I'd ever had a year like this, to think straight and .08 ::HAD :=Jessie: of the time I wouldn't even know I'd had one, except I wake up with different .08 ::HAD :=Jessie: down or something and it wasn't till I had the fit when Cecil was looking that anybody .08 ::HAD :=Mama: I think your daddy had fits, too. I think he sat in his chair .08 ::HAD :=Mama: The lady in this story had kept track of hers and she'd had eighty .08 ::HAD :=Mama: Jessie, I think your daddy had little... .08 ::HAD :=Mama: You got me once real good. I had to get a tetanus! But I know what to .08 ::HAD :=Mama: to what I'm telling you. This lady had anywhere between five and five hundred .08 ::HAD :=Mama: wasn't the first time, Jessie. You had a fit when you were five years old. .08 ::HAD :=Mama: I even brought this up! You haven't had a seizure for a solid year. A whole year, .08 ::HAD :=Mama: about two weeks altogether, and she had a full-time secretary job and an IQ of .08 ::HAD :=Mama: some people don't even know they've had one. .08 ::HAD :=Mama: I fed you the wrong thing. Maybe you had a fever sometime and I didn't know it .08 ::HAD :=Mama: too. I think he sat in his chair and had little fits. I read this a long time .08 ::HAD :=Mama: story had kept track of hers and she'd had eighty thousand of them in the last eleven .09 ::HAD :=Jessie: I had this strange little thought, well, maybe .09 ::HAD :=Mama: How can I get up every day knowing you had to kill yourself to make it stop hurting .10 ::HAD :=Jessie: lost. Things you didn't know you had, even. You'll see. .10 ::HAD :=Jessie: know exactly which ones. Oh, and I had your dress cleaned that you wore to Daddy's. .10 ::HAD :=Jessie: put the cover back on the sofa. You had no idea. All right? I really think it's .10 ::HAD :=Jessie: was the shot. And whatever reasons I had, well, you guess I just took them with .10 ::HAD :=Jessie: go of me, Mama. I've said everything I had to say. .10 ::HAD :=Jessie: Tell him we talked about him and I only had good things to say about him, but mainly .01 ::HAIR :=Jessie: It's not for my hair, Mama. What about some old pillows anywhere, .01 ::HAIR :=Mama: I said don't make a mess. Your hair is black enough, hon. .03 ::HAIR :=Mama: it Ricky or Cecil or your fits or your hair falling out or you drink too much coffee .05 ::HAIR :=Jessie: one day when Agnes is out getting her hair done, you could take them all for a .06 ::HAIR :=Jessie: knows what you thought. All that curly hair. .08 ::HAIR :=Mama: like your green eyes and your straight hair. It's not my fault! .09 ::HAIR :=Jessie: one more house or Dawson losing his hair or... .07 ::HALF :=Mama: out here? I didn't know enough to do half the things I did in my life. Things .01 ::HALL :=Jessie: and you hear this -- noise down the hall? .03 ::HALL :=Jessie: extra light bulbs in a box in the hall closet. And we've got a couple of packages .10 ::HALL :=Mama: I can too! I'll stand in front of this hall and you can't get past me. You'll have .08 ::HAMMERS :=Jessie: I've got all the ties here with the hammers and all. Take them out of the box .01 ::HAND :=Mama: We'll just hand it over to them when they come, how's .01 ::HAND :=Mama: Dawson took the shotgun, didn't he? Hand me that basket, hon. .04 ::HAND :=Mama: That's Agnes. "Jessie's shook the hand of death and I can't take the chance .09 ::HAND :=Jessie: and drooled on the sheet and felt your hand pulling my quilt back up over me. That's .03 ::HANDI-WIPES :=Jessie: It's O.K. Handi-Wipes and sponges under the sink. .03 ::HANDLE :=Jessie: When the call comes, you let Dawson handle it. .01 ::HANDS :=Jessie: Your hands aren't washed. Do you want a manicure .01 ::HANDS :=Jessie: Get your hands washed. I'll be right back. And get .01 ::HANDS :=Jessie: Then wash your hands and don't talk to me any more about .01 ::HANDS :=Jessie: Every word. Wash your hands and that's the last time I'm telling .01 ::HANDS :=Jessie: Neither do I. Wash your hands. .01 ::HANDS :=Jessie: And get 'em real dry. You dry your hands till I get back or it's no go, all .02 ::HANDS :=Jessie: killing me. They'll probably test your hands for gunpowder, anyway, but you'll .04 ::HANDS :=Mama: Your hands are cold. .09 ::HANDS :=Jessie: would want a manicure? We could hold hands for an hour and then I could go shoot .09 ::HANDS :=Mama: yard just waiting for me to have my hands full someday and how am I supposed .10 ::HANDS :=Mama: manicure, I guess. Want me to wash my hands again? .02 ::HANG :=Jessie: do it before he gets here. Soon as you hang up the phone, I'll just walk in the .03 ::HANG :=Jessie: I want to hang a big sign around my neck, like Daddy's .10 ::HANGING :=Jessie: like a free tube of toothpaste I found hanging on the door one day. .07 ::HAPPEN :=Mama: the things I did in my life. Things happen. You do what you can about them and .09 ::HAPPEN :=Mama: But something might happen. Something that could change everything. .03 ::HAPPENED :=Jessie: it or not. They were there when it happened and it don't belong to them, it .03 ::HAPPENED :=Mama: What happened at Christmas? .10 ::HAPPENED :=Jessie: test, I guess, and ask you what happened, and by that time, the ambulance .03 ::HAPPENS :=Jessie: to me and I'm going to say what happens to it. And it's going to stop. And .07 ::HAPPENS :=Mama: you can about them and you see what happens next. I married you off to the wrong .07 ::HAPPENS :=Mama: be ready to try it again, honey, that happens sometimes. Go downtown. Find him. .08 ::HAPPENS :=Mama: happens? How can you not know what happens? .08 ::HAPPENS :=Mama: wall, you know. You don't know what happens? How can you not know what happe .09 ::HAPPENS :=Jessie: For whatever happens, I don't know. For the rest of your .09 ::HAPPENS :=Jessie: see, it doesn't much matter what else happens in the world or in this house, even. .09 ::HAPPENS :=Mama: or what I don't get done before it happens. .03 ::HAPPY :=Jessie: I think you're pretty happy, yeah. You have things you like to .09 ::HARD :=Mama: This is just like you. Do it the hard way, that's my girl, all right. You .01 ::HAS :=Jessie: The barrel has to be clean, Mama. Old powder, dust gets .02 ::HAS :=Mama: right now. We'll just see what he has to say about this little stunt. .03 ::HAS :=Jessie: Now, this drawer has everything in it that there's no better .04 ::HAS :=Jessie: houses and about how many birds she has and how much okra she eats and why she .04 ::HAS :=Mama: her at all. I'll tell her she just has to come and she'll come, all right. She .04 ::HAS :=Mama: this week. God only knows why. She has a perfectly good Trimline at home. .08 ::HAS :=Jessie: Then what if it does! What if it has everything to do with you! What if you .08 ::HAS :=Mama: Everything you do has to do with me, Jessie. You can't do anything, .08 ::HAS :=Mama: about this killing yourself. It has to be me that's the matter here. You .08 ::HAS :=Mama: eat right when I was carrying you. It has to be something I did. .08 ::HAS :=Mama: you, Jessie, it's the same thing. This has to do with me, Jessie. .09 ::HAS :=Mama: he can. He'll talk about how much he has to pay to park his car these days. .10 ::HAS :=Jessie: much, but I wish he knew not everybody has her size feet. .01 ::HATE :=Mama: won't it? You hear me, honey? I hate it when the coconut falls off. Why does .04 ::HATE :=Mama: I hate milk. Coats your throat as bad as okra. .04 ::HATE :=Mama: I hate those birds. She says I don't understand .09 ::HATE :=Mama: Jessie. I'm not like you, Jessie. I hate the quiet and I don't want to die and .06 ::HATED :=Jessie: I never understood why he hated it so much when it's so good. Smoking .07 ::HATED :=Mama: was a selfish man. He told me once he hated to see people move into his houses .01 ::HAVE :=Jessie: clothes up there. Somebody should have them. You ought to call the Salvation .01 ::HAVE :=Mama: What have you been doing in there? .01 ::HAVE :=Mama: Well, you can have it if you want. When I die, you'll get .01 ::HAVE :=Mama: When he died, they told me I could have them back, but I never did like those .01 ::HAVE :=Mama: You come down from there before you have a fit. I can't come up and get you, .01 ::HAVE :=Mama: and be a real fine boy, Jess. But I have to tell you, I wouldn't want Ricky to .01 ::HAVE :=Mama: You haven't forgot what night it is, have you? They're all chipped, see? I've .01 ::HAVE :=Mama: I'm not trying to help, sugar. We don't have anything anybody'd want, Jessie. I mean, .02 ::HAVE :=Jessie: I have to go in the bedroom and lock the door .02 ::HAVE :=Jessie: Dawson doesn't have any more to do with this. .02 ::HAVE :=Jessie: If you call him, I'll just have to do it before he gets here. Soon as .02 ::HAVE :=Jessie: going to act like this, I wouldn't have told you. .02 ::HAVE :=Mama: excited. You'll cock the pistol and have a fit. .03 ::HAVE :=Jessie: just been letting me do it so I'll have something to do, haven't you? .03 ::HAVE :=Jessie: having a very good time and I don't have any reason to think it'll get anything .03 ::HAVE :=Jessie: I'm going to stop it. So. Let's just have a good time. .03 ::HAVE :=Jessie: when I went to the hospital. I could have a seizure any time. What good would .03 ::HAVE :=Jessie: you want your order the same day, you have to call before ten. And they won't deliver .03 ::HAVE :=Jessie: I think you're pretty happy, yeah. You have things you like to do. .03 ::HAVE :=Jessie: I want to listen to. It's all I really have that belongs to me and I'm going to .03 ::HAVE :=Jessie: won't kill me. If it would, I wouldn't have to. .03 ::HAVE :=Mama: Have a good time. .03 ::HAVE :=Mama: You don't have to. .03 ::HAVE :=Mama: You didn't have any business being by yourself right .03 ::HAVE :=Mama: Well, you'll have to say it better because I'm not letting .03 ::HAVE :=Mama: You never should have moved back in here with me. If you'd .03 ::HAVE :=Mama: Loretta doesn't ever have to come over here again. Dawson can .03 ::HAVE :=Mama: place when Cecil left you, you'd have made some new friends at least. Had .03 ::HAVE :=Mama: and everybody's boring and you don't have anything to do and you don't like me .03 ::HAVE :=Mama: home when he comes. And we don't ever have to see Dawson either if he bothers you. .03 ::HAVE :=Mama: house if you don't want to. You don't have to take care of me, Jessie. .03 ::HAVE :=Mama: through. You just watch me. You don't have to do another thing in this house if .03 ::HAVE :=Mama: you? Did you write this down? How long have you been thinking about this? .04 ::HAVE :=Jessie: Does that mean I can't have a caramel apple? .04 ::HAVE :=Jessie: How many birds does she have? .04 ::HAVE :=Jessie: I bought cocoa, Mama. And I'd like to have a caramel apple and do your nails. .04 ::HAVE :=Jessie: could ever tell, you mean. You didn't have to lie to me about Agnes. .04 ::HAVE :=Jessie: and why she won't come over here. If I have to keep dragging the truth out of you, .04 ::HAVE :=Jessie: see me have a fit and's afraid I might have another one if she came over, or wh .04 ::HAVE :=Jessie: something, sometime? Or did she see me have a fit and's afraid I might have another .04 ::HAVE :=Mama: You have to have marshmallows. That's the old .04 ::HAVE :=Mama: Why do you have to know so much about things, Jessie? .04 ::HAVE :=Mama: You have to have marshmallows. That's the old way, Jess. .04 ::HAVE :=Mama: Why does she have a house full of birds? .04 ::HAVE :=Mama: not. I mean -- Of course you can have a caramel apple. .04 ::HAVE :=Mama: wasn't the truth, Jessie. Things don't have to be true to talk about 'em, you k .05 ::HAVE :=Jessie: It didn't have to. I miss him. .05 ::HAVE :=Jessie: I wouldn't have expected him to. .05 ::HAVE :=Jessie: anymore. He didn't mean to. I didn't have to come here. We've been through th .05 ::HAVE :=Jessie: else comes over here to cook, they'll have something to cook in, and that's the .05 ::HAVE :=Mama: He didn't have anything to say to me, Jessie. That's .05 ::HAVE :=Mama: Then what would you have done? .05 ::HAVE :=Mama: He never said a word he didn't have to, Jessie. That was probably all he'd .05 ::HAVE :=Mama: come back from fishing and all he'd have to show for it was -- a whole pipe-cleaner .05 ::HAVE :=Mama: a real waste of chocolate. You don't have to finish it. .05 ::HAVE :=Mama: you were born and he said you didn't have a chance. .05 ::HAVE :=Mama: and cups. I'll use paper. Loretta can have what she wants and Dawson can sell the .05 ::HAVE :=Mama: around without any clothes on, they'd have been born that way." .05 ::HAVE :=Mama: How could I love him, Jessie. I didn't have a thing he wanted. He got his share, .05 ::HAVE :=Mama: I had died instead of him, he wouldn't have taken you in like I did. .06 ::HAVE :=Jessie: You have no earthly idea how I feel. .06 ::HAVE :=Jessie: them you'd run out of Cokes and you'd have to drink it. I told them I knew you .06 ::HAVE :=Mama: All right! I wanted you to have a husband. .06 ::HAVE :=Mama: at all, did you? Any of it! What have you been living on all these years, .06 ::HAVE :=Mama: am I just any old woman now? When you have a fit, do you see stars or what? How .07 ::HAVE :=Jessie: Oh, he'll have plenty of that. Five years for forgery, .07 ::HAVE :=Jessie: special, a couple of boards would have been just fine, but he used that yellow .07 ::HAVE :=Jessie: built for Ricky. I told him he didn't have to spend so much time on it, but he .07 ::HAVE :=Jessie: creek in back of the house. It didn't have to be anything special, a couple of .07 ::HAVE :=Jessie: it. I said, "How long does a baby bed have to last, anyway?" But maybe he thought .07 ::HAVE :=Mama: So I should have let you just sit here? Sit like your .07 ::HAVE :=Mama: love you, Jessie, or he wouldn't have left. .08 ::HAVE :=Jessie: I have a box of things I want people to have. .08 ::HAVE :=Jessie: It doesn't have anything to do with you! .08 ::HAVE :=Jessie: But I didn't have another one. .08 ::HAVE :=Jessie: How many fits did I have? .08 ::HAVE :=Jessie: all the rest of it if only I didn't have you here? What if the only way I can .08 ::HAVE :=Jessie: I was an epileptic, Mama, I wouldn't have ridden any horses. .08 ::HAVE :=Jessie: to do with you! What if you are all I have and you're not enough? What if I could .08 ::HAVE :=Jessie: I have a box of things I want people to have. I'm just going to go get it for you. .08 ::HAVE :=Mama: What have we just been talking about? You'll be .08 ::HAVE :=Mama: He said kids have them all the time. He said there wasn't .08 ::HAVE :=Mama: Your mouth bites down and I have to get your tongue out of the way fast, .08 ::HAVE :=Mama: If I told him about you, I'd have to tell him about him! .08 ::HAVE :=Mama: You bet it is. You might never have another one, ever! You might be through .08 ::HAVE :=Mama: I can tell when you're about to have one. Your eyes get this big! But, Jessie, .08 ::HAVE :=Mama: like a freak, is that what I should have done? .08 ::HAVE :=Mama: take Loretta to Howard Johnson's and have those fried clams. I know you love that .08 ::HAVE :=Mama: you want to. I can take it. You don't have to act like you're just visiting here, .09 ::HAVE :=Jessie: You can because you have to. It's what you've always done. .09 ::HAVE :=Jessie: No, Mama! We wouldn't have more talks like tonight, because it's .09 ::HAVE :=Jessie: and I didn't make it. Me -- who might have made a difference to me -- I'm not going .09 ::HAVE :=Jessie: so good, Mama. No, Mama. This is how I have my say. This is how I say what I thought .09 ::HAVE :=Mama: Yes! No. No. I -- might not have thought of all the things you've sa .09 ::HAVE :=Mama: the truth when you ask me. Let you have your say. .09 ::HAVE :=Mama: Try it for two more weeks. We could have more talks like tonight . .09 ::HAVE :=Mama: gone! I guess you think they'll all have to talk about you now! I guess you think .09 ::HAVE :=Mama: the back yard just waiting for me to have my hands full someday and how am I supposed .09 ::HAVE :=Mama: you want. Maybe with me gone, you'll have all the quiet you want, right here in .09 ::HAVE :=Mama: can get brave and try some more . You don't have to give up! .09 ::HAVE :=Mama: longer. Just a few more years. I don't have that many more to go, Jessie. And as .10 ::HAVE :=Jessie: No, Mama. You have to be more selfish from now on. Now, .10 ::HAVE :=Jessie: I want Loretta to have my little calculator. Dawson bought .10 ::HAVE :=Jessie: him what I did, and tell Ricky you have something for him, out here, from me, .10 ::HAVE :=Jessie: me and I thought you might like to have it, but I didn't think you'd wear it .10 ::HAVE :=Jessie: first one to me. Be funny for her to have it now, don't you think? And all my .10 ::HAVE :=Jessie: get enough food to feed them all and have some left for you. But don't let anybody .10 ::HAVE :=Jessie: Agnes will be there, so you might not have to talk at all. .10 ::HAVE :=Jessie: mine, and I don't want anybody else to have any of it. .10 ::HAVE :=Mama: They wake up fast, Jessie, if they have to. They don't matter here, Jessie. .10 ::HAVE :=Mama: children. I'll talk about what they have on, that's always good. And I'll have .10 ::HAVE :=Mama: up, honey. It's only fair to let her have some macaroni or something. .10 ::HAVE :=Mama: have on, that's always good. And I'll have some crochet work with me. .10 ::HAVE :=Mama: hall and you can't get past me. You'll have to knock me down to get away from me, .01 ::HAVEN'T :=Mama: You haven't forgot what night it is, have you? .03 ::HAVEN'T :=Jessie: me do it so I'll have something to do, haven't you? .08 ::HAVEN'T :=Mama: eyes get this big! But, Jessie, you haven't... .08 ::HAVEN'T :=Mama: the reason I even brought this up! You haven't had a seizure for a solid year. A .10 ::HAVEN'T :=Jessie: home. You'll probably see people you haven't seen for years, but I thought about .03 ::HAVING :=Jessie: Mama -- I'm just not having a very good time and I don't have .03 ::HAVING :=Mama: You're not having a good time! Whoever promised you .01 ::HE :=Jessie: He did. .01 ::HE :=Jessie: any more about Ricky. Those two rings he took were the last valuable things I had, .01 ::HE :=Jessie: I'd turn him in myself if I knew where he was. .01 ::HE :=Mama: Dawson took the shotgun, didn't he? Hand me that basket, hon. .01 ::HE :=Mama: Maybe he's in with some bad people. He just needs some time, sugar. He'll get .01 ::HE :=Mama: then. There's that box from the ones he wore to the hospital. When he died, they .01 ::HE :=Mama: to take those rubber boots, too, but he said they were for fishing. I told him .01 ::HE :=Mama: the ones he wore to the hospital. When he died, they told me I could have them back, .02 ::HE :=Jessie: He took it as a compliment. He thought I .02 ::HE :=Jessie: He took it as a compliment. He thought I might be taking an interest .02 ::HE :=Jessie: they'd send me some bullets and he said he'd just call for me, because he .02 ::HE :=Jessie: me all about the bullets and then he said we ought to talk like this more .02 ::HE :=Jessie: send them if he told them to. And he was absolutely right. Here they are. .02 ::HE :=Jessie: I guess. Anyway, I asked Dawson if he thought they'd send me some bullets and .02 ::HE :=Jessie: because he knew they'd send them if he told them to. And he was absolutely right. .02 ::HE :=Jessie: him, I'll just have to do it before he gets here. Soon as you hang up the phone, .02 ::HE :=Jessie: I was worried about prowlers. He said he thought it was a good idea. He told me .02 ::HE :=Jessie: He said he thought it was a good idea. He told me what kind to ask for. .02 ::HE :=Jessie: he said he'd just call for me, because he knew they'd send them if he told them .02 ::HE :=Jessie: might be taking an interest in things. He got through telling me all about the bullets .02 ::HE :=Jessie: told him I was worried about prowlers. He said he thought it was a good idea. He .02 ::HE :=Mama: If he had any idea... .02 ::HE :=Mama: How could he do that? .02 ::HE :=Mama: That gun's no good, you know. He broke it right before he died. He dropped .02 ::HE :=Mama: He broke it right before he died. He dropped it in the mud one day. .02 ::HE :=Mama: you know. He broke it right before he died. He dropped it in the mud one da .02 ::HE :=Mama: Dawson will put a stop to this. Yes he will. He'll take the gun away. .02 ::HE :=Mama: Dawson right now. We'll just see what he has to say about this little stunt. .03 ::HE :=Jessie: He just calls me Jess like he knows who he's .03 ::HE :=Jessie: Sure he does. Be sure you clean out the lint tray .03 ::HE :=Jessie: He just calls me Jess like he knows who he's talking to. He's always .03 ::HE :=Mama: When he died, they checked them. .03 ::HE :=Mama: Make him sorry he hurt you, then. That's it, isn't it? .03 ::HE :=Mama: ever have to see Dawson either if he bothers you. Does he bother you? .03 ::HE :=Mama: could come over, you know. What if he calls us? .03 ::HE :=Mama: Dawson either if he bothers you. Does he bother you? .03 ::HE :=Mama: Dawson can just leave her at home when he comes. And we don't ever have to see Dawson .05 ::HE :=Jessie: He didn't mean anything by that, Mama. .05 ::HE :=Jessie: I know he loved me. .05 ::HE :=Jessie: Not anymore. He didn't mean to. I didn't have to come .05 ::HE :=Jessie: You didn't ever love him, or he did something and you stopped loving him, .05 ::HE :=Jessie: it might be better for you after he died. You'd get interested in things. .05 ::HE :=Jessie: love him. Sorry for you, I mean. He seemed like a nice man. .05 ::HE :=Jessie: know what Daddy said to you the night he died. You came storming out of his room .05 ::HE :=Jessie: were going to watch Gunsmoke. What did he say to you? .05 ::HE :=Mama: He didn't have anything to say to me, Jessie. .05 ::HE :=Mama: He felt sorry for me. He wanted a plain country .05 ::HE :=Mama: He felt sorry for you, too, Jessie, don't .05 ::HE :=Mama: He never really went fishing, you know. Never .05 ::HE :=Mama: He never said a word he didn't have to, Jessie. .05 ::HE :=Mama: The way he told it? I'm sitting in the mud, he comes .05 ::HE :=Mama: What if he did? It didn't change anything. .05 ::HE :=Mama: Oh, I see. He died and left you stuck with me and you're .05 ::HE :=Mama: He never said a word he didn't have to, Jessie. That was probably .05 ::HE :=Mama: He felt sorry for me. He wanted a plain country woman and that's .05 ::HE :=Mama: If I had died instead of him, he wouldn't have taken you in like I did .05 ::HE :=Mama: I didn't have a thing he wanted. He got his share, though. You loved him enough .05 ::HE :=Mama: that. He said you were a runt and he said it from the day you were born and .05 ::HE :=Mama: him, Jessie. I didn't have a thing he wanted. He got his share, though. You .05 ::HE :=Mama: boat myself. But you, you knew what he was thinking about and you're going to .05 ::HE :=Mama: he told it? I'm sitting in the mud, he comes along, drags me in the kitchen, .05 ::HE :=Mama: pipe cleaners a couple of times but he always had more somewhere. .05 ::HE :=Mama: was full of chewing tobacco and all he ever did was drive out to the lake and .05 ::HE :=Mama: you wouldn't be killing yourself if he were still alive. That's a fine thing .05 ::HE :=Mama: and I told him to get a shirt on and he went in and got one and then he said, .05 ::HE :=Mama: and that's what he married, and then he held it against me the rest of my life .05 ::HE :=Mama: a plain country woman and that's what he married, and then he held it against me .05 ::HE :=Mama: birds than I got from the two of you. He could've had that GONE FISHING sign around .05 ::HE :=Mama: his last chance not to talk to me and he took full advantage of it. .05 ::HE :=Mama: say to me, Jessie. That's why I left. He didn't say a thing. It was his last chance .05 ::HE :=Mama: somehow. Like I remember this one day he was standing on the porch and I told him .05 ::HE :=Mama: told me. And Bennie at the bait shop, he told Dawson. They all laughed about it. .05 ::HE :=Mama: It was a big fat lie, the whole thing. He just thought it was funnier that way. .05 ::HE :=Mama: Jessie, don't kid yourself about that. He said you were a runt and he said it from .05 ::HE :=Mama: he'd said to me all day, Jessie. So if he said it, there was something to it, but .05 ::HE :=Mama: in a shoe store? Why should I? Because he said to? Because you said to? Well I wasn't .05 ::HE :=Mama: on and he went in and got one and then he said, real peaceful, but to the point, .05 ::HE :=Mama: said it from the day you were born and he said you didn't have a chance. .06 ::HE :=Jessie: I never understood why he hated it so much when it's so good. Smoking .06 ::HE :=Jessie: They didn't bother him at all. Except he did feel responsible for it. It was his .06 ::HE :=Jessie: comes on Wednesdays and Saturdays, and he leaves the order blanks in an egg box, .06 ::HE :=Jessie: of Magnesia box. Cecil left me because he made me choose between him and smokin .06 ::HE :=Mama: He had a girl, Jessie. I walked right in .06 ::HE :=Mama: Jessie, I know he wasn't that dumb. .06 ::HE :=Mama: I never thought he was good enough for you. They moved here .07 ::HE :=Jessie: He is not. Ricky is as much like me as it's .07 ::HE :=Jessie: He wasn't the wrong man, Mama. I loved Cecil .07 ::HE :=Jessie: He wasn't the wrong man. .07 ::HE :=Jessie: Or that baby bed he built for Ricky. I told him he didn't .07 ::HE :=Jessie: I loved that bridge he built over the creek in back of the house. .07 ::HE :=Jessie: and he got it straight from me. And he knows not to try to get work, and .07 ::HE :=Jessie: not to try to get work, and guess where he got that. He walks around like there's .07 ::HE :=Jessie: bed he built for Ricky. I told him he didn't have to spend so much time on it, .07 ::HE :=Jessie: love me, not Cecil. But that's how he felt. .07 ::HE :=Jessie: . And he knows not to trust anybody and he got it straight from me. And he knows .07 ::HE :=Jessie: do. I think he did the right thing. He gave himself another chance, that's all. .07 ::HE :=Jessie: everything I loved out here if only he would take me with him, but he couldn't .07 ::HE :=Jessie: to get work, and guess where he got that. He walks around like there's loose .07 ::HE :=Jessie: I see it on his face. I hear it when he talks. We look out at the world and we .07 ::HE :=Jessie: bed have to last, anyway?" But maybe he thought if it was strong enough, it might .07 ::HE :=Jessie: down around me like they do. I think he did the right thing. He gave himself another .07 ::HE :=Jessie: I tried to stay outside with him, but he always knew I was trying, so it didn't .07 ::HE :=Jessie: boards would have been just fine, but he used that yellow pine and rubbed it s .07 ::HE :=Jessie: have to spend so much time on it, but he said it had to last, and the thing ended .07 ::HE :=Jessie: Ricky's out there trying to get even . And he knows not to trust anybody and he .07 ::HE :=Jessie: if only he would take me with him, but he couldn't and I understood that. I wrote .07 ::HE :=Jessie: to look at you, if you don't mind? No. He loved me, Mama. He just didn't know how .07 ::HE :=Jessie: you don't mind? No. He loved me, Mama. He just didn't know how things fall down .07 ::HE :=Mama: He didn't love you, Jessie, or he wouldn't .07 ::HE :=Mama: He had responsibilities here. He had a wife .07 ::HE :=Mama: He was a selfish man. He told me once he .07 ::HE :=Mama: Then he should've taken you with him! .07 ::HE :=Mama: He was a selfish man. He told me once he hated to see people move .07 ::HE :=Mama: He had responsibilities here. He had a wife and son here and he failed .07 ::HE :=Mama: He didn't love you, Jessie, or he wouldn't have left. .07 ::HE :=Mama: Go downtown. Find him. Talk to him. He didn't know what he had in you. Maybe .07 ::HE :=Mama: I admit that. So I took you in when he left. I'm sorry. .07 ::HE :=Mama: here. He had a wife and son here and he failed you. .07 ::HE :=Mama: into his houses after he built them. He knew they'd mess them up. .07 ::HE :=Mama: He was a selfish man. He told me once he hated to see people move into his houses .07 ::HE :=Mama: didn't know what he had in you. Maybe he sees things different now, but you're .07 ::HE :=Mama: him. Talk to him. He didn't know what he had in you. Maybe he sees things different .07 ::HE :=Mama: see people move into his houses after he built them. He knew they'd mess them .07 ::HE :=Mama: go see him. Or call him up! Right now! He might be home. .08 ::HE :=Jessie: So what if he had little fits? It's not inherited. I .08 ::HE :=Jessie: wanted to see, so it was better when he wasn't looking at me all the time. .08 ::HE :=Jessie: -- a relief in a way. I never was what he wanted to see, so it was better when he .08 ::HE :=Mama: He said kids have them all the time. He said .08 ::HE :=Mama: He thought you were -- you fell down a lot. .08 ::HE :=Mama: But I get you cleaned up before he gets here and I make him leave before .08 ::HE :=Mama: your daddy had fits, too. I think he sat in his chair and had little fits. .08 ::HE :=Mama: you. I don't know what he thought. He didn't think about it. .08 ::HE :=Mama: -- you fell down a lot. That's what he thought. You were careless. Or maybe he .08 ::HE :=Mama: He said kids have them all the time. He said there wasn't anything to do but wait .08 ::HE :=Mama: eating a popsicle and down you went. He gave it to you. It's his fault, not m .08 ::HE :=Mama: thought. You were careless. Or maybe he thought I beat you. I don't know what .08 ::HE :=Mama: thought I beat you. I don't know what he thought. He didn't think about it. .08 ::HE :=Mama: Your daddy gave you those fits, Jessie. He passed it down to you like your green .09 ::HE :=Mama: he looks like and I don't know how he sounds coming up behind me like that or .09 ::HE :=Mama: he'll change the subject as fast as he can. He'll talk about how much he has .09 ::HE :=Mama: as he can. He'll talk about how much he has to pay to park his car these days .09 ::HE :=Mama: myself anyhow when I don't know what he looks like and I don't know how he sounds .10 ::HE :=Jessie: Well, then, I hope he gets some good dope with it, Mama. And .10 ::HE :=Jessie: every penny the way she does, so he gave the first one to me. Be funny for .10 ::HE :=Jessie: hears you tell her that. I'm glad he loves Loretta so much, but I wish he knew .10 ::HE :=Jessie: it for himself, you know, but then he saw one he liked better and he couldn't .10 ::HE :=Jessie: then he saw one he liked better and he couldn't bring both of them home with .10 ::HE :=Jessie: he loves Loretta so much, but I wish he knew not everybody has her size feet. .10 ::HE :=Jessie: last week and he answered, so I know he still there. .10 ::HE :=Jessie: call Cecil. I called it last week and he answered, so I know he still there. .10 ::HE :=Jessie: I think he'll feel like a real jerk if he doesn't. Me telling him to, like this .10 ::HE :=Jessie: himself, you know, but then he saw one he liked better and he couldn't bring both .10 ::HE :=Mama: man he was to make you feel the way he did and I'll give Ricky's watch to Dawson .10 ::HE :=Mama: tell me what to tell Dr. Davis when he calls or how much you want me to tell .10 ::HE :=Mama: I'll tell Cecil what a miserable man he was to make you feel the way he did and .02 ::HE'D :=Jessie: send me some bullets and he said he'd just call for me, because he knew they'd .05 ::HE'D :=Mama: he'd come back from fishing and all he'd have to show for it was -- a whole pipe-cleaner .05 ::HE'D :=Mama: Dawson. They all laughed about it. And he'd come back from fishing and all he'd .05 ::HE'D :=Mama: have to, Jessie. That was probably all he'd said to me all day, Jessie. So if he .06 ::HE'D :=Jessie: even met him at all. You thought maybe he'd help you out around the place, come .08 ::HE'D :=Jessie: Daddy would've known if he'd had fits, Mama. .01 ::HE'LL :=Mama: He just needs some time, sugar. He'll get back in school or get a job or .01 ::HE'LL :=Mama: a job or one day you'll get a call and he'll say he's sorry for all the trouble .02 ::HE'LL :=Jessie: too small, but they go with the robe, he'll say. Be back in a minute. .02 ::HE'LL :=Mama: will put a stop to this. Yes he will. He'll take the gun away. .07 ::HE'LL :=Jessie: Oh, he'll have plenty of that. Five years for .07 ::HE'LL :=Mama: isn't through yet. You don't know how he'll turn out! .09 ::HE'LL :=Mama: If somebody asks Dawson about it, he'll change the subject as fast as he can. .09 ::HE'LL :=Mama: And Ricky will be married by then and he'll bring your grandbabies over and you .09 ::HE'LL :=Mama: change the subject as fast as he can. He'll talk about how much he has to pay to .10 ::HE'LL :=Jessie: I think he'll feel like a real jerk if he doesn't. .10 ::HE'LL :=Mama: He'll buy dope with it! .10 ::HE'LL :=Mama: He'll sell it! .10 ::HE'LL :=Mama: And you think he'll go for it? .01 ::HE'S :=Jessie: He's just too lazy to climb up there, Mama. .01 ::HE'S :=Jessie: lazy to climb up there, Mama. Or maybe he's just being smart. That floor's not very .01 ::HE'S :=Jessie: the last valuable things I had, so now he's started in on other people, door to .01 ::HE'S :=Mama: say he's sorry for all the trouble he's caused and invite you out for supper .01 ::HE'S :=Mama: day you'll get a call and he'll say he's sorry for all the trouble he's caused .01 ::HE'S :=Mama: something Ricky's going through. Maybe he's in with some bad people. He just needs .02 ::HE'S :=Mama: He's your brother. .03 ::HE'S :=Jessie: He's hurt me, I've hurt him. We're about .03 ::HE'S :=Jessie: like he knows who he's talking to. He's always wondering what I do all day. .03 ::HE'S :=Jessie: He just calls me Jess like he knows who he's talking to. He's always wondering what .03 ::HE'S :=Mama: I'm so dumb. He's the one run under the tractor. .03 ::HE'S :=Mama: get one that he's got a job, that he's getting married, or how about he's joined .03 ::HE'S :=Mama: he's into. You could get one that he's got a job, that he's getting married, .03 ::HE'S :=Mama: he's getting married, or how about he's joined the army, wouldn't that be n .03 ::HE'S :=Mama: always going to be some new trouble he's into. You could get one that he's got .04 ::HE'S :=Jessie: get Buster to build her a new one, he's dead. How could she burn it up? .06 ::HE'S :=Mama: He's the best carpenter I ever saw. That .08 ::HEAD :=Jessie: I'm not laughing. My head turns around and I fall down and then .08 ::HEAD :=Jessie: been run over. Sometimes I feel my head start to turn around or hear myself .09 ::HEAD :=Jessie: at the colors waving around over her head and chewed on a polka-dot whale and .08 ::HEAP :=Mama: to tell. You just -- crumple, in a heap, like a puppet and somebody cut the .01 ::HEAR :=Jessie: just brushing your teeth and you hear this -- noise down the hall? .01 ::HEAR :=Mama: him out of my treats, won't it? You hear me, honey? I hate it when the coconut .07 ::HEAR :=Jessie: I see it on his face. I hear it when he talks. We look out at the .08 ::HEAR :=Jessie: I feel my head start to turn around or hear myself scream. And sometimes there is .10 ::HEAR :=Jessie: Now, when you hear the shot, I don't want you to come in. .10 ::HEAR :=Jessie: pan. You wash that pan till you hear the doorbell ring and I don't care if .09 ::HEARD :=Jessie: It was somebody pink and fat who never heard of sick and lonely, somebody who cried .09 ::HEARD :=Mama: because, I mean, honey, you've never heard noise like that in your life. Who am .10 ::HEARD :=Jessie: and said, "'Night, Mother," and you heard me close my bedroom door and the next .10 ::HEARD :=Jessie: my bedroom door and the next thing you heard was the shot. And whatever reasons .10 ::HEARS :=Jessie: worn any of them, and make sure Dawson hears you tell her that. I'm glad he loves .08 ::HEAVY :=Jessie: I'm too heavy for you now. How do you do it? .08 ::HEAVY :=Jessie: it if you don't. And keep ordering the heavy black bags. It doesn't pay to buy the .05 ::HELD :=Mama: that's what he married, and then he held it against me the rest of my life like .09 ::HELD :=Jessie: and got fed, and reached up and got held and kicked but didn't hurt anybody, .02 ::HELL :=Mama: You'll go to hell just for saying that, Jessie! .02 ::HELL :=Mama: It's a sin. You'll go to hell. .01 ::HELP :=Jessie: That doesn't help much, Mother. .01 ::HELP :=Mama: I'm not trying to help, sugar. We don't have anything anybody'd .02 ::HELP :=Jessie: Just trying to help, Mama. .02 ::HELP :=Jessie: Dawson will get here just in time to help you clean up. Go ahead, call him. Then .06 ::HELP :=Jessie: met him at all. You thought maybe he'd help you out around the place, come in and .09 ::HELP :=Mama: every day, and you're supposed to help me die when the time comes. I can't .09 ::HELP :=Mama: mean there isn't something that would help. You find it. You think of it. You can .03 ::HELPER :=Jessie: The plumber's helper is under the sink, too. .05 ::HELPS :=Jessie: The cocoa helps. .03 ::HER :=Mama: She'd never in her life, would she? .03 ::HER :=Mama: What's the matter with her? .03 ::HER :=Mama: over here again. Dawson can just leave her at home when he comes. And we don't ever .04 ::HER :=Jessie: Good for her. .04 ::HER :=Jessie: Three, then. Her whole house burns up? Her clothes and .04 ::HER :=Jessie: She wouldn't burn her house down now. Where would she go? She .04 ::HER :=Jessie: for one thing. Why they stay with her when they could be outside with the other .04 ::HER :=Jessie: she wear all those whistles around her neck? .04 ::HER :=Jessie: she go? She can't get Buster to build her a new one, he's dead. How could she burn .04 ::HER :=Jessie: Three, then. Her whole house burns up? Her clothes and pillows and everything? I'm .04 ::HER :=Mama: Her kitchen is just a tiny thing. When she .04 ::HER :=Mama: I could make her come over here, Jessie. I could call .04 ::HER :=Mama: does. And she says they just follow her home. Well, I know for a fact she's still .04 ::HER :=Mama: thought about her at all. I'll tell her she just has to come and she'll come, .04 ::HER :=Mama: time ago. But she's still got it in her, I'm sure of it. .04 ::HER :=Mama: I didn't know you ever thought about her at all. I'll tell her she just has to .04 ::HER :=Mama: and expect to get away with it. Made her crazy. .04 ::HER :=Mama: come over here, Jessie. I could call her up right now and she could bring the .05 ::HER :=Jessie: one day when Agnes is out getting her hair done, you could take them all for .05 ::HER :=Mama: I'll tell her to bring a pan. You said you would do .05 ::HER :=Mama: Agnes gets more talk out of her birds than I got from the two of you. .08 ::HER :=Jessie: it. So you can call Loretta and remind her. .08 ::HER :=Mama: fifteen seconds apiece, so that out of her life, she'd only lost about two weeks .09 ::HER :=Jessie: she wanted to, just by closing her eyes. Somebody who mainly just laid there .09 ::HER :=Jessie: at the colors waving around over her head and chewed on a polka-dot whale .10 ::HER :=Jessie: and make sure Dawson hears you tell her that. I'm glad he loves Loretta so much, .10 ::HER :=Jessie: my house slippers are in a sack for her in my closet. Tell her I know they'll .10 ::HER :=Jessie: but I wish he knew not everybody has her size feet. .10 ::HER :=Jessie: in a sack for her in my closet. Tell her I know they'll fit and I've never worn .10 ::HER :=Jessie: gave the first one to me. Be funny for her to have it now, don't you think? And .10 ::HER :=Mama: Connie Richards does come, I can get her to tell me where she gets that Irish .10 ::HER :=Mama: set up, honey. It's only fair to let her have some macaroni or something. .01 ::HERE :=Jessie: Here it is. I found it. .01 ::HERE :=Mama: is way too far to come for what's out here to steal. Never seen a one. .01 ::HERE :=Mama: I told you, we don't get criminals out here. .02 ::HERE :=Jessie: I don't want anybody else over here. Just you and me. If Dawson comes over, .0