Source Text: CANDIDA2.3Marchbanks: Is anything the matter?
Morell: Nothing but this: that either you were right this morning, or Candida is mad.
Burgess: What! Candy mad too! Oh, come! come! come!
Candida: Oh, youre only shocked! Is that all? How conventional all you unconventional people are!
Burgess: Come: be'ave yourself, Candy. Whatll Mr Morchbanks think of you?
Candida: This comes of James teaching me to think for myself, and never to hold back out of fear of what other people may think of me. It works beautifully as long as I think the same things as he does. But now! because I have just thought something different! look at him! Just look!
Burgess: Well, James, you certnly haint as himpressive lookin as usu'l.
Morell: I suppose not. I beg all your pardons: I was not conscious of making a fuss. Well, well, well, well!
Candida: Well, Eugene: why are you so sad? Did the onions make you cry?
Marchbanks: It is your cruelty. I hate cruelty. It is a horrible thing to see one person make another suffer.
Candida: Poor boy! have I been cruel? Did I make it slice nasty little red onions?
Marchbanks: Oh, stop, stop: I dont mean myself. You have made him suffer frightfully. I feel his pain in my own heart. I know that it is not your fault: it is something that must happen; but dont make light of it. I shudder when you torture him and laugh.
Candida: I torture James! Nonsense, Eugene: how you exaggerate! Silly! Dont work any more, dear. Come and talk to us.
Morell: Ah no: I cant talk. I can only preach.
Candida: Well, come and preach.
Burgess: Aw no, Candy. Ang it all!
Lexy: How do you do, Mrs Morell? So glad to see you back again.
Candida: Thank you, Lexy. You know Eugene, dont you?
Lexy: Oh yes. How do you do, Marchbanks?
Marchbanks: --uite well, thanks.
Lexy: I've just come from the Guild of St Matthew. They are in the greatest consternation about your telegram.
Candida: What did you telegraph about, James?
Lexy: He was to have spoken for them tonight. Theyve taken the large hall in Mare Street and spent a lot of money on posters. Morell's telegram was to say he couldnt come. It came on them like a thunderbolt.
Candida: Given up an engagement to speak!
Burgess: Fust time in his life, I'll bet. Ain it, Candy?
Lexy: They decided to send an urgent telegram to you asking whether you could not change your mind. Have you received it?
Morell: Yes, yes: I got it.
Lexy: It was reply paid.
Morell: Yes, I know. I answered it. I cant go.
Candida: But why, James?
Morell: Because I dont choose. These people forget that I am a man: they think I am a talking machine to be turned on for their pleasure every evening of my life. May I not have one night at home, with my wife, and my friends.
Candida: Oh, James, you musnt mind what I said about that. And if you dont go youll have an attack of bad conscience tomorrow.
Lexy: I know, of course, that they make the most unreasonable demands on you. But they have been telegraphing all over the place for another speaker; and they can get nobody but the President of the Agnostic League.
Morell: Well, an excellent man. What better do they want?
Lexy: But he always insists so powerfully on the divorce of Socialism from Christianity. He will undo all the good we have been doing. Of course, you know best; but --
Candida: Oh, do go, James. We'll all go.
Burgess: Look ere, Candy! I say! Lets stay at home by the fire, comfortable. He wont need to be more'n a couple-o- hour away.
Candida: Youll be just as comfortable at the meeting. We'll all sit on the platform and be great people.
Eugene: Oh please dont let us go on the platform. No: everyone will stare at us: I couldnt. I'll sit at the back of the room.
Candida: Dont be afraid. Theyll be too busy looking at James to notice you.
Morell: Prossy's complaint, Candida! Eh?
Candida: Yes: Prossy's complaint.
Burgess: Prossy's complaint! What are you talkin about, James?
Morell: Miss Garnett.
Proserpine: Yes, Mr Morell. Coming.
Burgess: Listen ere, Mr. Mill. Whats Prossy's complaint? Whats wrong with er?
Lexy: Well, I dont exactly know; but she spoke very strangely to me this morning. I'm afraid she's a little out of her mind sometimes.
Burgess: Why, it must be catchin! Four in the same ouse!
Proserpine: What is it, Mr Morell?
Morell: Telegraph to the Guild of St Matthew that I am coming.
Proserpine: Dont they expect you?
Morell: Do as I tell you.
Morell: Burgess: you dont want to come.
Burgess: Oh, dont put it like that, James. It's ony that it aint Sunday, you know.
Morell: I'm sorry. I thought you might like to be introduced to the chairman. He's on the Works Committee of the County Council, and has some influence in the matter of contracts. You'll come?
Burgess: Cawrse I'll come, James. Aint it awlus a pleasure to ear you!
Morell: I shall want you to take some notes at the meeting, Miss Garnett, if you have no other engagement. You are coming, Lexy, I suppose?
Lexy: Certainly.
Candida: We're all coming, James.
Morell: No: you are not coming; and Eugene is not coming. You will stay here and entertain him -- to celebrate your return home.
Candida: But, James --
Morell: I insist. You do not want to come; and he does not want to come. Oh, dont concern yourselves: I shall have plenty of people who have never heard me before.
Candida: Eugene: wouldnt you like to come?
Morell: I should be afraid to let myself go before Eugene: he is so critical of sermons. He knows I am afraid of him: he told me as much this morning. Well, I shall shew him how much afraid I am by leaving him here in your custody, Candida.
Marchbanks: Thats brave. Thats beautiful.
Candida: But -- but -- Is anything the matter, James? I cant understand --
Morell: Ah, I thought it was I who couldnt understand, dear.